(no subject)
last night was great i had alot of fun i dont know why my dream was so horrible... i feel like its true.. and i was so upset that i actually felt the pain .. ill tell you the story.. so i have this best freind and her boyfreind is awesome too.. i love them to death.. well i was in love with a girl... and i dont know what happend... but my " freind" was hooking up the girl i used to be so in love with or whatever with her boyfreinds coworker and i saw it all as if i was looking at them and they couldnt see me there.. they planned dates to hang out and all that shit .. i felt so decieved .. why? because this is my best freind making plans to take out the girl i used to love and i still feel some kind of weird attraction to her .. but its mostly painful... anyways .. is it weird that i felt so bad? so angry.. i dont know what to think.. ive had dreams like that before and they usually ... happen.. its weird.. i have a feeling im going to hit a big ass fucking wall pretty soon.. im here trying to make myself happy but my demons are coming out to kick my fucking ass! i dont know whats up all i know is that i want to get in a fight or something get this shit out of my system .. this HATE .. this PAIN... arghhhhhhhhhhhh