always sighing
i dont know why, but i think i need to be responsible and end this, because i am going to end up breaking you into little pieces of old fashioned agony, and i dont want to do that to you.
i can't take this because i'm used to believing in adoration, and i'm used to NOT being an expendable accessory. i don't know if i can do this knowing you don't really want to care.
you contradict yourself a lot, did you know that?
i always get in far too deep for my own good, and last night it was tears in the pillow case and the desire to let you choke me just so i could look death in the face.
i've been this pathetic for a while now, and the old mantra is starting to grow strong again.
i'm lost like usual and covering my eyes and hiding under the bed because i just want to run away from it all, only i'm too much of a good girl to get high and smashed like so many of you do. and it's things like that that make me think i'm masochistic.
i wish i didnt need anything like this, and i wish i didn't hate myself every other hour.
i can't take this because i'm used to believing in adoration, and i'm used to NOT being an expendable accessory. i don't know if i can do this knowing you don't really want to care.
you contradict yourself a lot, did you know that?
i always get in far too deep for my own good, and last night it was tears in the pillow case and the desire to let you choke me just so i could look death in the face.
i've been this pathetic for a while now, and the old mantra is starting to grow strong again.
i'm lost like usual and covering my eyes and hiding under the bed because i just want to run away from it all, only i'm too much of a good girl to get high and smashed like so many of you do. and it's things like that that make me think i'm masochistic.
i wish i didnt need anything like this, and i wish i didn't hate myself every other hour.