Happy birthday to me?!?!?
This past weekend was my b-day weekend and with all I had planned, operative word PLANNED, it was okay, just okay. Of course the reason for this is all my doing. I wanted to kick off my weekend by celebrating at my usual haunt on Fridays. We all went to the club around 9:30pm and by 11:00pm I was wasted, not drunk, WASTED. I do not know if I had fun or not because of this. I only realized the day after what an evening it was and how bad it ended. There are the blurs of thing s said and certain situations that come with a next day hangover, the ones you kinda know what happened but not really why or when or if they even did. Needless to say, I was an obnoxious drunk that evening, cussing up a storm to whom ever crossed me or even attempted to do the exact opposite of what I wanted. Saturday i was hurting bad, first physically then emotionally, after I had found out from various sources what had transpired the evening before. My ego was bruised as well as both my body (still haven't figured that one out.) I acted like a complete jerk of the worst kind, I acted out emotions that I have been suppressing for quite sometime as it turns out. I know why I did,what the root cause was after a very lengthy discussion with Chris, as far as what is eating at me inside, but I never knew my demons were that pent up, just waiting for the perfect moment where I would lose control of what was keeping them hostage. I still don't feel right about anything that happened. It's all mend-able I suppose, just the fact I was that out of control of my emotions still bothers me to this moment. That much anger and resentment spilled out on an evening set aside to celebrate.
Saturday was going to be another going out day in Austin. I had barely the energy to get dressed to go to dinner with my family. My day started at 2pm when I woke up to get ready to head to Austn for my birthday dinner with my family. We ate at Red Lobster, yum. After, Chris and I went by David's apt and hung out for about an hour before deciding to just go home and skip the Paradox adventure for the evening. I was just not ready to go out and party another night, not after the night I had before. We just stayed home and watched movies. I was totally fine and not disappointed as I thought I would be. I had a nice Sat evening.
Sunday, my actual b-day, I turned 29. I went to lunch with my cousin and Chris and did some shopping. Later, I was suppose to go to Austin again to Elysium. Early on I decided I did not want to go, though I was feeling better recovering from Friday, I did not want to go out dancing, I even contemplated whether I would go out at all again anytime soon. So anyway, we stayed home, invited a couple of friends over, made hotwings and some chips and dip and stayed home watching movies. At least I caught up on movies I wanted to see!!
As far as gifts, I received;
Clothes and cologne
Green Day hits CD
The Killers CD
Hand painted Madonna wood nesting dolls
Hand painted Pooh nesting doll from germany
Portable CD/MP3 player for my truck (no cd player in truck)
Gift cert from Best Buy
Some star wars figures I had wanted
All in all it was a nice b-day. I turned out different than what I expected, and looking at it now, maybe that was a good thing. I had originally planned on drinking my weekend away, not really connecting or spending quality time with Chris or my friends and family. That was one good thing I can say came from Friday night!!
Saturday was going to be another going out day in Austin. I had barely the energy to get dressed to go to dinner with my family. My day started at 2pm when I woke up to get ready to head to Austn for my birthday dinner with my family. We ate at Red Lobster, yum. After, Chris and I went by David's apt and hung out for about an hour before deciding to just go home and skip the Paradox adventure for the evening. I was just not ready to go out and party another night, not after the night I had before. We just stayed home and watched movies. I was totally fine and not disappointed as I thought I would be. I had a nice Sat evening.
Sunday, my actual b-day, I turned 29. I went to lunch with my cousin and Chris and did some shopping. Later, I was suppose to go to Austin again to Elysium. Early on I decided I did not want to go, though I was feeling better recovering from Friday, I did not want to go out dancing, I even contemplated whether I would go out at all again anytime soon. So anyway, we stayed home, invited a couple of friends over, made hotwings and some chips and dip and stayed home watching movies. At least I caught up on movies I wanted to see!!
As far as gifts, I received;
Clothes and cologne
Green Day hits CD
The Killers CD
Hand painted Madonna wood nesting dolls
Hand painted Pooh nesting doll from germany
Portable CD/MP3 player for my truck (no cd player in truck)
Gift cert from Best Buy
Some star wars figures I had wanted
All in all it was a nice b-day. I turned out different than what I expected, and looking at it now, maybe that was a good thing. I had originally planned on drinking my weekend away, not really connecting or spending quality time with Chris or my friends and family. That was one good thing I can say came from Friday night!!