[ it's not until the sun sets that spike's able to leave the sun-free sanctity of his residence here in luceti and track down the slayer. he didn't say anything about willow going home over the journals, even though he probably should have. he just didn't know what to say that wasn't in person and was never all that much of a fan of doing things over lines of communication such as letters and telephone calls and that godforsaken e-mail business that he rather enjoyed watching angel fail at back home, but that was neither here nor there. and now that the sun was down and the risk of bursting into flames was gone, he could offer whatever she needed - someone to talk to, someone to scream at, a round of kick the spike, maybe even a hug if she'd allow him to give her one - in person and not through some book.
tracking her isn't difficult, especially in a closed in place like this, and instead of doing his usual routine of "spike, we really should get you a bell" and popping out of the shadows unnoticed, the vampire makes a point to step on a twig to defy the natural, stealthy nature of his being and alert her of his presence (if her vampire senses weren't already tingling), tacking on a vocal announcement there at the end as he steps out of the bushes. ]
Buffy.
[ not slayer, not pet or love or anything else he could've called her. just her name. ]
[When the vamp-senses go a-tingling, Buffy pays attention. In smoother, less selfish repeat of the festival night, she hopes the sensation means the arrival of Drusilla. It would be nice to deal with this problem before anyone got hurt. Or, anyone else in the assumption that there has already been a victim or two.
But then she hears her name and her rather rigid figure relaxes. Imperceptible to many, but most likely impossible to ignore for the vampire who knows her so well.]
Spike. [She turns to look behind her--to look at Spike. There were so many different opening lines available to her. One about Willow, one about how he had questioned her honour the day before. One about how sorry she was, but an apology was right out. She has done too much of that already.
So, Buffy lands on the other common thread:] I'm guessing you saw the big threat-fest with Drusilla?
[ on any other day, he would've given her a look and squinted while making some smart ass comment towards her immediate jump to business, but today, he doesn't. he keeps his expression neutral, free of malice or question - though there is concern. no need to hide that. willow is buffy's best friend and had been since before he rolled into sunnydale and first took out that sign they had to keep putting back up...because he kept running into it. a best friend who's now gone. yay and all for her being returned home to where she belongs, but not so much for the slayer who's left behind, once again. ]
'Course. Tried to detour a few of the potential to-be-bittens, but not sure if any of them took the hint or the blunt laying down of all the cards. People here tend to be a bit more daft than even those infuriating Hollywood folk who seem to think going into a dark alley with someone dressed like Disco Stu is a wonderful idea with no negative consequences of the blood-loss type to come.
[For now, it's enough to be able to let the BFF-grief be visible in all of her body language. If she can be honest in this small capacity, then it's one small slice of coping.]
There's...a guy. Haseo. He used to--[God, she can't believe it even though she knows it's true.] He used to feed her. He could be a great help, but I don't know how to tell if she's just pulling his strings or not. [Buffy pauses, wincing.] Can she even pull strings?
[Drusilla may have spent a great deal of time in Sunnydale at the same time as Buffy, but the Slayer's interactions with her were limited. It had always been Spike, or Angelus.]
[ spike grimaces and nods, slowly and reluctantly. ] ...she can. She's good at hypnotism, especially on humans. Actually, I'm not sure if it works on other vampires or demons. Works on Slayers. [ he pauses and eyes her wearily, apologetically. the truth hardly ever sounded good. ] That's how she killed that Slayer that was around before Faith. Part of it, at least.
Kendra. [Buffy offers her name with a steely edge. She had known the who of the other Slayer's death, but not the distinct how. She had arrived there just in time to be blamed for the whole thing.]
So, that's a big-time no on trusting him, then. [She sighs. She had been hoping for a boon that wasn't a beatstick--because, so far? That hadn't helped.]
[ he doesn't comment on kendra. that had happened pre-soul, pre-chip. he'd applauded dru for it, nevermind the fact that spike's killed two slayers, himself. ]
Probably not. Doesn't mean you can't try to rough some information out of him.
[She appears doubtful at the prospect of roughing Haseo up. Truthfully, he had been a great help during the last time Drusilla had rampaged. But bringing that up meant bringing up Atoli and Angel and a whole bunch of things that she does not want to pile on top of everything else.]
Look--Spike. [Buffy eyes him, carefully.] If I asked you, would you tell me where to find her? [No compunction to play it dumb. She knows there is a connection between vampire and sire--and she is not ashamed to try and use that to her advantage.]
North. [ he answers without a beat, turning to point in that direction. after a moment, he drops his hand to his side and turns back to her. ] You'll have to do it, y'know. The final blow. [ he makes as if to stake himself with an invisible stake, fist over his heart while mimicking the whoosh sound a vampire makes as they dust. ] I'll fight her, I'll beat her down, but I don't... I don't think I could take that last shot.
[ he takes in an unnecessary gulp of air and lets it out, slowly. ] I almost killed Angel, once. There was this cup, silly thing to do with this false prophecy as part of that Lindsey fellow I told you about's plans. I could've done it. Ended it, right then and there and God knows part of me wanted to - a large part - but I couldn't.
[ he runs a hand over his hair - hair that's starting to go brown at the roots. bleaching again hasn't really occurred to him. ] I'm not saying I wouldn't if it came down to it with Dru, just that you shouldn't rely on me to. I'll be by your side in whatever you need me for, I just...wanted you to know that.
[Buffy nods. Fair enough--perhaps she would rather the final blow, anyway. Drusilla has plagued her for long enough, in Luceti and, well? She is thankful enough to have Spike's support in the matter. Another competent fighter is a blessing, but one who could offer insights into Drusilla's movements? Doubly so.]
You're one better than me, then. [She offers, rather lightly.] Because I did kill Angel. Obviously not very permanently, but--[it felt like it.] But it happened. [Frown.] Thanks to you, of course.
[She begins walking in the indicated direction. Might as well take this investigation to the next level.] At least Will went home before whatever-the-heck-this-is-gonna-be goes down.
[ spike nods. ] Of course. I've got no reason to lie to you, love, and I'd never forgive myself if something happened to you, because you've got it in your head I'll do something I can't, all because I never opened my mouth about it.
[ he doesn't comment on her killing angel. touchy pre-soul/pre-chip subject, just like kendra. he remembered, standing there in the hall with dru in his arms, watching them fight and remarking to the dead air around him about how angelus was going to kill her. and then he just shrugged and walked away. it made sense to him - hell, he was there - as to why he just didn't give a damn, but at the same time, from the point of view of a man who had his conscience back...he felt horrid about it and found himself asking "what if" - if he'd stayed, would she have been forced to do that? so many roads not taken.
the vampire falls in step with her when she mentions willow. good, she brought it up herself. he would rather her take the initiative in that topic, for he often ended up on the other side of a fist whenever he tried. ] Yeah. Red's had enough trouble, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't be sad to see her go.
[Business may have been the opening argument, but the subject does invariably come back to just how roughly she is taking the disappearance. She has watched so many of them come and go. And, this time, it was the second instance of walking into her bedroom only to find half of its contents missing. It isn't quite so dramatic as when Kirk had left; after all, she will see Willow again. She just needs to win the golden ticket, too.]
Not really her scene, anyway. [She talks as though it has somehow become hers. A hokey old village just newly brought into the electric era. But she has so very keenly tried to own a slice of the violence in this place. By comparison, she had wanted to protect Willow from the really worst pats of Luceti. The kidnappings and the fighting. The random psychos who decide that some weeks just look like prime murdering moments.
It is important to note that Buffy's behaviour does not close off, again. Nowhere near as carefully protected as she had been while walking. Although it had been for a minority percentage of the time she had been normaltastic, Spike's presence and obvious on-her-sidedness had had a tremendous effect on how she interprets his company.]
Maybe not, but you liked having her here. You can't tell me that you didn't and that you wouldn't be completely opposed to her coming back. [ he shoves his hands inside his duster, though he keeps his eyes on her. ] I know you, Buffy. [ and his voice drops to barely above a whisper as he points out: ] This is eatin' you up inside.
Of course I liked having her here. [Spike is right. Spike's almost always right, in these matters. It was infuriating and comforting all at once. It upsets her that someone else should be able to so easily access her feelings, without even trying; however, it was a nice break to not actually have to put words to all these feelings. He just knew.]
It was nice having a non-ex-enemy around, for a change. [So that isn't quite the truth. Will did have her evil moment. But that had still been after six years of dedicated goodness. It made a difference--even if it was hard to admit to Spike--in comparison to all of these other folks who had tried to kill her in the past, but here trying to move on. There had been a long and lonely stretch where Faith had inherited the title of closest friend from home. Things had been...strained.]
Hey. Stop for a minute. [ not in the interest of taking no for an answer, Spike reaches out and grabs her arm, just below the elbow and maneuvers around her until he's standing in front of her, blocking her path. he doesn't take his hand away. ] It's hard, I know. And I'm not going to feed you a load of fluff and say that you should be happy she's away from here, because while there is that, it's not the whole caboodle. You should let it hurt and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. You, most of all, are allowed to be selfish now and again.
tracking her isn't difficult, especially in a closed in place like this, and instead of doing his usual routine of "spike, we really should get you a bell" and popping out of the shadows unnoticed, the vampire makes a point to step on a twig to defy the natural, stealthy nature of his being and alert her of his presence (if her vampire senses weren't already tingling), tacking on a vocal announcement there at the end as he steps out of the bushes. ]
Buffy.
[ not slayer, not pet or love or anything else he could've called her. just her name. ]
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But then she hears her name and her rather rigid figure relaxes. Imperceptible to many, but most likely impossible to ignore for the vampire who knows her so well.]
Spike. [She turns to look behind her--to look at Spike. There were so many different opening lines available to her. One about Willow, one about how he had questioned her honour the day before. One about how sorry she was, but an apology was right out. She has done too much of that already.
So, Buffy lands on the other common thread:] I'm guessing you saw the big threat-fest with Drusilla?
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'Course. Tried to detour a few of the potential to-be-bittens, but not sure if any of them took the hint or the blunt laying down of all the cards. People here tend to be a bit more daft than even those infuriating Hollywood folk who seem to think going into a dark alley with someone dressed like Disco Stu is a wonderful idea with no negative consequences of the blood-loss type to come.
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There's...a guy. Haseo. He used to--[God, she can't believe it even though she knows it's true.] He used to feed her. He could be a great help, but I don't know how to tell if she's just pulling his strings or not. [Buffy pauses, wincing.] Can she even pull strings?
[Drusilla may have spent a great deal of time in Sunnydale at the same time as Buffy, but the Slayer's interactions with her were limited. It had always been Spike, or Angelus.]
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So, that's a big-time no on trusting him, then. [She sighs. She had been hoping for a boon that wasn't a beatstick--because, so far? That hadn't helped.]
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Probably not. Doesn't mean you can't try to rough some information out of him.
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Look--Spike. [Buffy eyes him, carefully.] If I asked you, would you tell me where to find her? [No compunction to play it dumb. She knows there is a connection between vampire and sire--and she is not ashamed to try and use that to her advantage.]
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[ he takes in an unnecessary gulp of air and lets it out, slowly. ] I almost killed Angel, once. There was this cup, silly thing to do with this false prophecy as part of that Lindsey fellow I told you about's plans. I could've done it. Ended it, right then and there and God knows part of me wanted to - a large part - but I couldn't.
[ he runs a hand over his hair - hair that's starting to go brown at the roots. bleaching again hasn't really occurred to him. ] I'm not saying I wouldn't if it came down to it with Dru, just that you shouldn't rely on me to. I'll be by your side in whatever you need me for, I just...wanted you to know that.
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You're one better than me, then. [She offers, rather lightly.] Because I did kill Angel. Obviously not very permanently, but--[it felt like it.] But it happened. [Frown.] Thanks to you, of course.
[She begins walking in the indicated direction. Might as well take this investigation to the next level.] At least Will went home before whatever-the-heck-this-is-gonna-be goes down.
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[ he doesn't comment on her killing angel. touchy pre-soul/pre-chip subject, just like kendra. he remembered, standing there in the hall with dru in his arms, watching them fight and remarking to the dead air around him about how angelus was going to kill her. and then he just shrugged and walked away. it made sense to him - hell, he was there - as to why he just didn't give a damn, but at the same time, from the point of view of a man who had his conscience back...he felt horrid about it and found himself asking "what if" - if he'd stayed, would she have been forced to do that? so many roads not taken.
the vampire falls in step with her when she mentions willow. good, she brought it up herself. he would rather her take the initiative in that topic, for he often ended up on the other side of a fist whenever he tried. ] Yeah. Red's had enough trouble, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't be sad to see her go.
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Not really her scene, anyway. [She talks as though it has somehow become hers. A hokey old village just newly brought into the electric era. But she has so very keenly tried to own a slice of the violence in this place. By comparison, she had wanted to protect Willow from the really worst pats of Luceti. The kidnappings and the fighting. The random psychos who decide that some weeks just look like prime murdering moments.
It is important to note that Buffy's behaviour does not close off, again. Nowhere near as carefully protected as she had been while walking. Although it had been for a minority percentage of the time she had been normaltastic, Spike's presence and obvious on-her-sidedness had had a tremendous effect on how she interprets his company.]
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It was nice having a non-ex-enemy around, for a change. [So that isn't quite the truth. Will did have her evil moment. But that had still been after six years of dedicated goodness. It made a difference--even if it was hard to admit to Spike--in comparison to all of these other folks who had tried to kill her in the past, but here trying to move on. There had been a long and lonely stretch where Faith had inherited the title of closest friend from home. Things had been...strained.]
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There's no time to let it hurt. There's--my God, Spike. There's way too much other stuff to do. There's Drusilla...and, the draft.
[Buffy feels the pressure of a deadline, having received her fate from Albert just briefly before meeting up with Spike.]
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