Prompt 030: Merlin ficlet: "Tis a Silly Piece" Merlin/Arthur, PG
Title: Tis a Silly Piece
Author shinodabear
Fandom: Merlin
Characters/Pairing(s): Merlin/Arthur established
Rating/Warnings: PG, crack-ish nods to Monty Python
Wordcount: 740
Disclaimer: The characters belong to the BBC, not me.
Prompt: 020. I started this a long time ago, having just found this now on the hard drive. I’m pretty sure it was written for this prompt; a cracky pic, a bird. It fits, I think.
One moment they were riding out to the forest for an afternoon’s hunt, then the next moment, Arthur was prancing about like a fool and Merlin was trailing behind him, clapping together two empty coconut halves.
“Percy!” Arthur shouted, keeping his hands raised as if he were holding reins.
“Merlin, sire,” Merlin corrected him.
“Yes, er,” Arthur shrugged off the confusion, dropping his "reins" and “dismounting” off of thin air. “Do you have any idea what’s happened to the horses?”
“Well, sire,” Merlin held out the coconut shells. “It appears something’s taken them and replaced them with two coconut shells.”
“Yes,” Arthur agreed. Then, “But who would do such a thing?”
“Well, sire,” Merlin blinked owlishly. “I saw a suspicious looking swallow a while back. Perhaps he snatched up our horses, dropped a coconut in their places, and buggered off to Africa for the winter. Shall we head back to Camelot, after all, to report the thievery?”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Merlin. A swallow could barely carry a coconut, never mind a horse.”
“Depends on what kind of swallow it was.”
“Does not.”
“Does so. An African swallow could carry a coconut across the sea. What’s to say it couldn’t carry a horse?”
“Common sense, Merlin!”
“I hardly thing a thing like that should play into it when we’ve seen stranger things happen.”
“Name one thing.”
“That rabbit that nearly took off your head.”
“What rabbit?”
“You know. The one with the,” Merlin gestured something that might have been “fangs.” “It could,” He started again, making another gesture. “The killer!”
“I don’t recall any such thing. I think you’re confusing reality with your dreams again.”
“Oh, this isn’t anything like my dreams, sire.” Merlin smirked devilishly - as devilishly as any semi-innocent idiot could. “I remember something decidedly less linen-like.” He smoothed down the wrinkles that had gathered on Arthur’s shirt. Merlin's hand remained on Arthur's chest when his work was done. He began to tug suggestively at the shirt’s laces.
Arthur frowned. “Don’t be absurd, Merlin. I believe it was simply the work of some idiot sorcerer who got bored and decided he didn’t want to ride horses all day, so he turned them into a couple of coconuts.”
Merlin sputtered indignantly, but Arthur kissed him anyway. “You could’ve simply said that you wanted to stop. The sight of my arse all afternoon is enough to have anyone tired of riding bloody horses.”
Author shinodabear
Fandom: Merlin
Characters/Pairing(s): Merlin/Arthur established
Rating/Warnings: PG, crack-ish nods to Monty Python
Wordcount: 740
Disclaimer: The characters belong to the BBC, not me.
Prompt: 020. I started this a long time ago, having just found this now on the hard drive. I’m pretty sure it was written for this prompt; a cracky pic, a bird. It fits, I think.
One moment they were riding out to the forest for an afternoon’s hunt, then the next moment, Arthur was prancing about like a fool and Merlin was trailing behind him, clapping together two empty coconut halves.
“Percy!” Arthur shouted, keeping his hands raised as if he were holding reins.
“Merlin, sire,” Merlin corrected him.
“Yes, er,” Arthur shrugged off the confusion, dropping his "reins" and “dismounting” off of thin air. “Do you have any idea what’s happened to the horses?”
“Well, sire,” Merlin held out the coconut shells. “It appears something’s taken them and replaced them with two coconut shells.”
“Yes,” Arthur agreed. Then, “But who would do such a thing?”
“Well, sire,” Merlin blinked owlishly. “I saw a suspicious looking swallow a while back. Perhaps he snatched up our horses, dropped a coconut in their places, and buggered off to Africa for the winter. Shall we head back to Camelot, after all, to report the thievery?”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Merlin. A swallow could barely carry a coconut, never mind a horse.”
“Depends on what kind of swallow it was.”
“Does not.”
“Does so. An African swallow could carry a coconut across the sea. What’s to say it couldn’t carry a horse?”
“Common sense, Merlin!”
“I hardly thing a thing like that should play into it when we’ve seen stranger things happen.”
“Name one thing.”
“That rabbit that nearly took off your head.”
“What rabbit?”
“You know. The one with the,” Merlin gestured something that might have been “fangs.” “It could,” He started again, making another gesture. “The killer!”
“I don’t recall any such thing. I think you’re confusing reality with your dreams again.”
“Oh, this isn’t anything like my dreams, sire.” Merlin smirked devilishly - as devilishly as any semi-innocent idiot could. “I remember something decidedly less linen-like.” He smoothed down the wrinkles that had gathered on Arthur’s shirt. Merlin's hand remained on Arthur's chest when his work was done. He began to tug suggestively at the shirt’s laces.
Arthur frowned. “Don’t be absurd, Merlin. I believe it was simply the work of some idiot sorcerer who got bored and decided he didn’t want to ride horses all day, so he turned them into a couple of coconuts.”
Merlin sputtered indignantly, but Arthur kissed him anyway. “You could’ve simply said that you wanted to stop. The sight of my arse all afternoon is enough to have anyone tired of riding bloody horses.”