2009
I really, really like Leona Lewis' cover of Run. Snow Patrol's original is good, low and dark, but hers feel more emotional, more heartbroken, and her voice is just gorgeous.
I was supposed to post an introspective post about 2008 and 2009 and naturally resolutions, because no new year is complete without it, but I ran out of time, after spending an afternoon fretting over Sec 1 Auditions. The tasks I set for the scriptwriters are completely fiendish, I say with a hint of pride.
I need to bathe by 10, so this has to be quick.
What stood out in 2008:
- 315. My class/the people in it have been a complete bunch of Awesomeness, and I speak the truth when I say 315's the best/most awesome class in the entire levelschool, and I am so, so glad I was in it in 2008, and I will again be in its promoted version (415!) in 2009. I still remember two years back, at the end of Sec 2, when I saw the class list, nearly 1/3 of 315 was people I didn't know, had only heard of, and I remember colour-coding them into People I Like, People I Don't, and People I Don't Know; it was a pretty even split into thirds, honestly, but now at the end of the year with them, I'm glad to say the number of people in the second and third categories have diminished to the point that the categories don't even exist anymore :D I've really had a lot of fun and good memories in 315, and it has always been a place which felt like an unconditional home to me, and I'm just so, so glad for 315, because it has definitely been a defining presence in my life. I need to remember to treasure the last year left there in 2009. Some of the best people in my life I met in 315, and yet others are in 315.
- OBS. This probably comes under 315, because it was one of the first experiences which bonded us together, and beyond that, true to its aim, it taught me a lot about myself, vulnerabilities and strengths both.
- History and SS lessons (aka Jalleh and Law :D). It's hard to really say what made them so inspiring, beyond that fact that they were, simply, because of the teachers and the discourse we had during the lessons. It was such a fantastic experience, being able to argue with teachers and in class without having to worry about speaking your mind, knowing that that's encouraged, even, because lessons would have been terribly boring otherwise, since I am apparently a Very Argumentative Person :D But Mr. Law and Mr. Jalleh have had huge impact on my life as personal examples, and they are two teachers I respect hugely.
- My batch! :D Things definitely aren't smooth-sailing, but this year saw our batch finally step up to their places as Sec 4s/English Drama exco, and it was really heart-warming to see them finally find their place in English Drama, and Lovebug! will definitely be the shiniest indicator of that brilliance within us. Despite everything that's happened, somehow I can always count on my batch being there when the CCA goes awry in spite of our best intentions. I've had first hand experience with that, so.
I'm thinking really hard. Obviously if I have to think this hard, then whatever I'm thinking of didn't stand out, right?
The people in 2008:
This actually goes out to every single person in my heart, because they are part of what made 2008 such an unforgettable year (not fantastic, because there were lousy moments, but definitely indelible from my memory). Some of the best memories of my life will be of them.
gee - this isn't the best memory ever, but just a recent one, of us having lunch after a two-week absence, and it was one of the best lunches I've ever had, because it was carefree and fun, and also together with liz, my birthday lunch earlier this year, which was the best birthday present they could ever give me (in Singapore; lunch - or any meal - with them in an exotic locale will beat that hands-down any day (; ), and she was also the first person I told about her and that means something, I think. our europe backpacking trip is still on, I hope! :D
liz - again, not the best, just a recent one, Christmas gathering at her house, because it had been so long, and gee and liz are the two people I can talk the easiest to; we've known each other for nearly six years nowsince practically forever, and there have been rubbish between us, but our friendship always prove the stronger for it, and it means a lot to me.
evan - baking cookies! or, fake-baking cookies less than a month earlier, and getting her Christmas card in the mail definitely ranks among the high points of Christmas, and also this time really, really long ago when she came up to me in class during recess and suddenly hugged me, and apologized (thrice, because I couldn't hear her muffled voice in my shoulder the first two times) for something I can't remember but it was something small and I thought it was really, really sweet, so.
bernice - during midyear paper checking, after I got my history paper back, and I got 28/40, and I got a little stunned and shocked, and I had to leave the history RA row because I was unwillingly tearing up, so I went to sit next to bernice, and she just held me while I cried really embarrassingly, and I can still remember how I was saying to her, "It's okay. I'm just crying because - it's quite stupid. I'm fine. Really." and she just went, "Darling, are you trying to convince yourself? You're the one crying! " and "Oh, Karen." in this, I-can't-believe-you're-crying-over-a-3.6-which-is-so-like-you but really nice way. this also sounds really stupid, but she lets me hug her when I need to.
deb - I remember the two of us talking in class after everyone had left, sometime before elections in both our CCA, and just talking and talking about all the things I can't say to anyone else in my batch or she to hers, and also movie! Awesome movie! I also remember her talking to me sometime after the Lit Fiasco, about the people in my life and just telling me some things which upset me a lot but were what I needed to know, before I got too blinded by the whole situation.
sam - somehow sam has always been there at some of the worst moments in 2008, haha. In a good way; somehow the people you've known in your primary school share a secret bond with you that's really, really hard to break. she was there after the jetty jump during OBS, when I couldn't jump, even after what must have been 20 minutes of fear and shivering there on the plank, in front of my OBS watch, people I didn't even know, and sally and her were there, encouraging me, and even after, when most of them had left first (so as to not pressure me) and after that complete embarrassment, sally and sam were the only two people I could stand talking to me for a long while, because it was a huge vulnerability, a huge weakness that just happened and I didn't trust the rest.
sally - I didn't really spend much time with her this year /: but I remember earlier in the year her writing me a long, long letter because she had been unhappy in her class, and sam and I talking to her about it, and then during OBS, when she had been unhappy because her watch didn't seem to contribute much, and us folding tents together, and me making peanut butter and jam sandwiches for her, and her dipping bread right into the jar (which was gross) because they had already washed the knife.
weiqing - who has been one of the closest people to me this year, surprisingly, given the amount of time we've actually spent together, but somehow being around her is really easy, and we spoken about things that I don't usually say to other people, and I remember this funny thing which happened sometimes towards the end of the year, when both of us were walking from the GO past the PB room, and we just happened to be holding hands, and then Mrs. Ho saw us, and she gave us (and our hands) this weird/raised-eyebrow look, and we laughed, and broke contact for just enough time to walk past her, and it was funny. kind of sweet, like her postcard to me, too, from Japan (not sent from Japan; gotten from Japan, and passed personally :D)
kar min - both kar min and weiqing are just fantastic people to argue with me (-grins), especially during history and SS and philo (except weiqing wasn't in our philo class, and kar min and I weren't friends then), and one of the sweetest things she'd done was to come looking for me every day during ICYL, even for the briefest of moments, because she always had something to do somewhere else, just to see if I was having fun and what I thought about it, and touching her hand to mine in farewell on the last day of ICYL, and us browsing supermarkets together :D
flo - I remember smses sent to me at simply random times, all sweet and just Flo-esque, sending me love and telling me she'd missed me, and it'll always make me smile, and she always seem happy to see me, and it's really just the odd feeling of knowing she thinks of you, like seeing an sms she sent at 2 am in the morning, and feeling a little frantic because it was slightly worrying, but when I asked her about it, she said it was nothing, or her calling me for help with her orientation speech, and it's hard to explain, but it's a very warm feeling knowing that someone knows you'll always be there for her.
sze min - because I think she knows why, and sometimes you need someone who knows exactly how you feel, and I can't even begin to imagine what she goes through, if my situation is bad enough /: also because she's my cat, and she's the most adorable chat ever, and - she plays the piano prettily (:
steph - we don't talk much, but when we do talk, about serious things, she somehow gets the crux of the matter, even if I refuse to admit it, and how she's much deeper than she looks, and also the two weeks of WEP, which was awesome and I wouldn't have wanted anyone else with me during that two weeks, and I remember making the giant card with her, and our dinner together on the last day of work during which we spoke about and laughed hysterically over silly things like vegetables (no, don't ask) and her drawing a Haha, Bob sticker just for me because she knew I liked it (:
ashima - because there is no one else I want as chair, and beside me during CCA, and even though we'll probably get completely sick of each other after a year together, We Will Do Great Things, and of course, I can never forget her plucking this gigantic flying bug out of my hair with her bare hands while watching Fourplay, and also tricking me into watching HSM 3 while she went off to agonise over Clueless and getting really, really mad at people on my behalf :)
tiffany - because she makes me feel the best when I'm angsting over her, and she's hyperactive, and bubbly, and somehow things which should be insulting sound hilarious coming from her, and also because she dances with me, and doesn't complain when I'm clumsy (:
anni - because she came to me before elections and told me that I had her vote of trust/confidence, and because I was with her during the whole OM-mix up with Ms Chen, and also because she always tries to make me feel included, and I can trust her to stick up for me, the way I would rip into anyone who hurt her.
dora - whose hairband I stole, and still have, and she doesn't really care if I never return it to her, I think, and also because she looked so very surprised when I met her at the airport and gave her a candy cane after OSL, and because she brought me to church to talk to some guy about Christianity once, and she understands my questions. Also, I think she has abs O:
you - I don't really understand how in six months you've become one of the most important people in my life, or at least the person who can make me happy the easiest, and the funny thing is under this attraction, our actions doesn't bely the fact that we really know only so little about each other, but the strongest memories I have of you are us sitting close in the foyer, waiting for your dad, you telling me about his university, and the way you look at me.
beverly - whom I knew for about six days during/after OSL, and probably not anymore, but she told me, commandingly to "I'm coming back for ICYL in 2010. So, join ICYL in 2010, okay? But only if I'm coming. If not, then it's okay." which was really sweet, I thought. Also she saw me dressed as a boy before I watched Comeback, and she was all O.o
There are more people in my life, but not a whole lot more; it is a nice feeling to know that I can trust those people above, would defend them fiercely and I want to remember them.
<3
Thinking about all that have made me realize that I need to make the effort to remember everyone in 2009, because it's easy to forget when you get caught up in all the rush of the moment.
I was supposed to post an introspective post about 2008 and 2009 and naturally resolutions, because no new year is complete without it, but I ran out of time, after spending an afternoon fretting over Sec 1 Auditions. The tasks I set for the scriptwriters are completely fiendish, I say with a hint of pride.
I need to bathe by 10, so this has to be quick.
What stood out in 2008:
- 315. My class/the people in it have been a complete bunch of Awesomeness, and I speak the truth when I say 315's the best/most awesome class in the entire levelschool, and I am so, so glad I was in it in 2008, and I will again be in its promoted version (415!) in 2009. I still remember two years back, at the end of Sec 2, when I saw the class list, nearly 1/3 of 315 was people I didn't know, had only heard of, and I remember colour-coding them into People I Like, People I Don't, and People I Don't Know; it was a pretty even split into thirds, honestly, but now at the end of the year with them, I'm glad to say the number of people in the second and third categories have diminished to the point that the categories don't even exist anymore :D I've really had a lot of fun and good memories in 315, and it has always been a place which felt like an unconditional home to me, and I'm just so, so glad for 315, because it has definitely been a defining presence in my life. I need to remember to treasure the last year left there in 2009. Some of the best people in my life I met in 315, and yet others are in 315.
- OBS. This probably comes under 315, because it was one of the first experiences which bonded us together, and beyond that, true to its aim, it taught me a lot about myself, vulnerabilities and strengths both.
- History and SS lessons (aka Jalleh and Law :D). It's hard to really say what made them so inspiring, beyond that fact that they were, simply, because of the teachers and the discourse we had during the lessons. It was such a fantastic experience, being able to argue with teachers and in class without having to worry about speaking your mind, knowing that that's encouraged, even, because lessons would have been terribly boring otherwise, since I am apparently a Very Argumentative Person :D But Mr. Law and Mr. Jalleh have had huge impact on my life as personal examples, and they are two teachers I respect hugely.
- My batch! :D Things definitely aren't smooth-sailing, but this year saw our batch finally step up to their places as Sec 4s/English Drama exco, and it was really heart-warming to see them finally find their place in English Drama, and Lovebug! will definitely be the shiniest indicator of that brilliance within us. Despite everything that's happened, somehow I can always count on my batch being there when the CCA goes awry in spite of our best intentions. I've had first hand experience with that, so.
I'm thinking really hard. Obviously if I have to think this hard, then whatever I'm thinking of didn't stand out, right?
The people in 2008:
This actually goes out to every single person in my heart, because they are part of what made 2008 such an unforgettable year (not fantastic, because there were lousy moments, but definitely indelible from my memory). Some of the best memories of my life will be of them.
gee - this isn't the best memory ever, but just a recent one, of us having lunch after a two-week absence, and it was one of the best lunches I've ever had, because it was carefree and fun, and also together with liz, my birthday lunch earlier this year, which was the best birthday present they could ever give me (in Singapore; lunch - or any meal - with them in an exotic locale will beat that hands-down any day (; ), and she was also the first person I told about her and that means something, I think. our europe backpacking trip is still on, I hope! :D
liz - again, not the best, just a recent one, Christmas gathering at her house, because it had been so long, and gee and liz are the two people I can talk the easiest to; we've known each other for nearly six years nowsince practically forever, and there have been rubbish between us, but our friendship always prove the stronger for it, and it means a lot to me.
evan - baking cookies! or, fake-baking cookies less than a month earlier, and getting her Christmas card in the mail definitely ranks among the high points of Christmas, and also this time really, really long ago when she came up to me in class during recess and suddenly hugged me, and apologized (thrice, because I couldn't hear her muffled voice in my shoulder the first two times) for something I can't remember but it was something small and I thought it was really, really sweet, so.
bernice - during midyear paper checking, after I got my history paper back, and I got 28/40, and I got a little stunned and shocked, and I had to leave the history RA row because I was unwillingly tearing up, so I went to sit next to bernice, and she just held me while I cried really embarrassingly, and I can still remember how I was saying to her, "It's okay. I'm just crying because - it's quite stupid. I'm fine. Really." and she just went, "Darling, are you trying to convince yourself? You're the one crying! " and "Oh, Karen." in this, I-can't-believe-you're-crying-over-a-3.6-which-is-so-like-you but really nice way. this also sounds really stupid, but she lets me hug her when I need to.
deb - I remember the two of us talking in class after everyone had left, sometime before elections in both our CCA, and just talking and talking about all the things I can't say to anyone else in my batch or she to hers, and also movie! Awesome movie! I also remember her talking to me sometime after the Lit Fiasco, about the people in my life and just telling me some things which upset me a lot but were what I needed to know, before I got too blinded by the whole situation.
sam - somehow sam has always been there at some of the worst moments in 2008, haha. In a good way; somehow the people you've known in your primary school share a secret bond with you that's really, really hard to break. she was there after the jetty jump during OBS, when I couldn't jump, even after what must have been 20 minutes of fear and shivering there on the plank, in front of my OBS watch, people I didn't even know, and sally and her were there, encouraging me, and even after, when most of them had left first (so as to not pressure me) and after that complete embarrassment, sally and sam were the only two people I could stand talking to me for a long while, because it was a huge vulnerability, a huge weakness that just happened and I didn't trust the rest.
sally - I didn't really spend much time with her this year /: but I remember earlier in the year her writing me a long, long letter because she had been unhappy in her class, and sam and I talking to her about it, and then during OBS, when she had been unhappy because her watch didn't seem to contribute much, and us folding tents together, and me making peanut butter and jam sandwiches for her, and her dipping bread right into the jar (which was gross) because they had already washed the knife.
weiqing - who has been one of the closest people to me this year, surprisingly, given the amount of time we've actually spent together, but somehow being around her is really easy, and we spoken about things that I don't usually say to other people, and I remember this funny thing which happened sometimes towards the end of the year, when both of us were walking from the GO past the PB room, and we just happened to be holding hands, and then Mrs. Ho saw us, and she gave us (and our hands) this weird/raised-eyebrow look, and we laughed, and broke contact for just enough time to walk past her, and it was funny. kind of sweet, like her postcard to me, too, from Japan (not sent from Japan; gotten from Japan, and passed personally :D)
kar min - both kar min and weiqing are just fantastic people to argue with me (-grins), especially during history and SS and philo (except weiqing wasn't in our philo class, and kar min and I weren't friends then), and one of the sweetest things she'd done was to come looking for me every day during ICYL, even for the briefest of moments, because she always had something to do somewhere else, just to see if I was having fun and what I thought about it, and touching her hand to mine in farewell on the last day of ICYL, and us browsing supermarkets together :D
flo - I remember smses sent to me at simply random times, all sweet and just Flo-esque, sending me love and telling me she'd missed me, and it'll always make me smile, and she always seem happy to see me, and it's really just the odd feeling of knowing she thinks of you, like seeing an sms she sent at 2 am in the morning, and feeling a little frantic because it was slightly worrying, but when I asked her about it, she said it was nothing, or her calling me for help with her orientation speech, and it's hard to explain, but it's a very warm feeling knowing that someone knows you'll always be there for her.
sze min - because I think she knows why, and sometimes you need someone who knows exactly how you feel, and I can't even begin to imagine what she goes through, if my situation is bad enough /: also because she's my cat, and she's the most adorable chat ever, and - she plays the piano prettily (:
steph - we don't talk much, but when we do talk, about serious things, she somehow gets the crux of the matter, even if I refuse to admit it, and how she's much deeper than she looks, and also the two weeks of WEP, which was awesome and I wouldn't have wanted anyone else with me during that two weeks, and I remember making the giant card with her, and our dinner together on the last day of work during which we spoke about and laughed hysterically over silly things like vegetables (no, don't ask) and her drawing a Haha, Bob sticker just for me because she knew I liked it (:
ashima - because there is no one else I want as chair, and beside me during CCA, and even though we'll probably get completely sick of each other after a year together, We Will Do Great Things, and of course, I can never forget her plucking this gigantic flying bug out of my hair with her bare hands while watching Fourplay, and also tricking me into watching HSM 3 while she went off to agonise over Clueless and getting really, really mad at people on my behalf :)
tiffany - because she makes me feel the best when I'm angsting over her, and she's hyperactive, and bubbly, and somehow things which should be insulting sound hilarious coming from her, and also because she dances with me, and doesn't complain when I'm clumsy (:
anni - because she came to me before elections and told me that I had her vote of trust/confidence, and because I was with her during the whole OM-mix up with Ms Chen, and also because she always tries to make me feel included, and I can trust her to stick up for me, the way I would rip into anyone who hurt her.
dora - whose hairband I stole, and still have, and she doesn't really care if I never return it to her, I think, and also because she looked so very surprised when I met her at the airport and gave her a candy cane after OSL, and because she brought me to church to talk to some guy about Christianity once, and she understands my questions. Also, I think she has abs O:
you - I don't really understand how in six months you've become one of the most important people in my life, or at least the person who can make me happy the easiest, and the funny thing is under this attraction, our actions doesn't bely the fact that we really know only so little about each other, but the strongest memories I have of you are us sitting close in the foyer, waiting for your dad, you telling me about his university, and the way you look at me.
beverly - whom I knew for about six days during/after OSL, and probably not anymore, but she told me, commandingly to "I'm coming back for ICYL in 2010. So, join ICYL in 2010, okay? But only if I'm coming. If not, then it's okay." which was really sweet, I thought. Also she saw me dressed as a boy before I watched Comeback, and she was all O.o
There are more people in my life, but not a whole lot more; it is a nice feeling to know that I can trust those people above, would defend them fiercely and I want to remember them.
<3
Thinking about all that have made me realize that I need to make the effort to remember everyone in 2009, because it's easy to forget when you get caught up in all the rush of the moment.