this just in part two
I realized a long time ago that my inability to write was killing me.
I've written two songs in six years.
I used to do an album a month.
It's like a part of me died.
Those two songs were both about Shannon. She killed that part of me with the fake imperfection.
I also realized that the last song I wrote, SLAM KING's "GB", was basically a suicide note. I wrote it as a goodbye to her, but, it's so fucking obvious it's me saying goodbye to the world.
In a way that's lovely but I was just answering negativity with negativity. I wasn't directing the hate out, I was channeling it back in.
When I think of this in terms of my recent panic attacks, a light bulb went off.
The longer I hold onto this dusty shit, the worse I feel. I'm killing myself for nothing and dragging everyone around me down with. It's the definition of bullshit and I've decided to stop.
Just have to be strong and take it one day at a time.
I've written two songs in six years.
I used to do an album a month.
It's like a part of me died.
Those two songs were both about Shannon. She killed that part of me with the fake imperfection.
I also realized that the last song I wrote, SLAM KING's "GB", was basically a suicide note. I wrote it as a goodbye to her, but, it's so fucking obvious it's me saying goodbye to the world.
In a way that's lovely but I was just answering negativity with negativity. I wasn't directing the hate out, I was channeling it back in.
When I think of this in terms of my recent panic attacks, a light bulb went off.
The longer I hold onto this dusty shit, the worse I feel. I'm killing myself for nothing and dragging everyone around me down with. It's the definition of bullshit and I've decided to stop.
Just have to be strong and take it one day at a time.