"Some of the information isn't quite digestable to even me as yet." - sociallyineptxx
Here's a girl that can always tell you how I feel without her actually knowing me. Here's a piece from her LiveJournal, no not my useless words cause they mostly tell you litterly and unpoeticly divine.. And actually, I wish I could have written what she says all by myself. But I guess sometimes, people can explain it better for you, then you do for yourself. Totally sociallyineptxx kicking ass, a bit adjusted by me :
"I came to a horrific realisation a couple of days ago.
Words don't seem to come so easy, when I need them oh so badly..
I'm scared to be honest. Though it's silly.
It's very silly.
But it's not, it's not. At the same time, it's so fucking un-silly that I'm scaring myself to fuck even thinking about it.
I just. I'm blaming my emotions. My hormones. I don't know, whatever.
I'M BLAMING SOMETHING, GODAMMIT.
I'm confused, not to mention emotionally flattened.
It's that time of year again.
The time when everybody's life moves forward a step, and I'm stuck on the same godforsaken fucking rung of this shitsville I call LIFE as I was last year. And the year before that.
Oh, and the year before that.
I'm getting older, but not getting anywhere.
And now THIS. The mother of all spanners. As if I didn't hate myself enough already.
Guess I kinda shoulda seen it coming, really?
But.. fuck, it hurts to think about. It aches and it stabs and it just. Bleh.
Fuck it. Fuck it all.
My heart is in my throat, and I haven't even hit UPDATE yet. Too much information? Too vague? Too dramarama? Who knows. Why am I so scared? Who fucking knows anymore."
I don't want these silly games anymore.. although I created them myself.. I don't want to hurt you.. because I love you.. and as for you.. I think I have to tell you all the same...
Please kill me...
dot. Although it will be never over.. really...