Captain EO is the Greatest Starfleet Captain of All Time:
I skipped out on Gallifrey 2010 on Saturday to go to Disneyland with Shane, Noelle, Noelle's mom and my godchild. Pictures coming some time next week in a locked post.
The reason we went to Disneyland, aside from forcing a toddler to mug for pictures: CAPTAIN MOTHERFUCKING EO. Noelle's a big MJ stan - in fact, Tomorrowland was full of them. The Captain EO tribute only reopened last weekend so there were still Michael Jackson cosplayers and people with original merchandise roaming around. It was actually pretty cute.
I remember thinking that Captain EO was goddamn awful as a kid. It doesn't help that it was next to my most favoritest ride ever: Star Tours. My parents always wanted to go see Captain EO and I was like, 'NO DAMMIT MICHAEL JACKSON TOUCHES LITTLE CHILDREN, HE'S A PERV.' So they would get in the no-line for Captain EO and I would spend dumb money on Star Wars crap until they were done.
Okay so the point I'm coming to is this: I take it back. I take it all back. Captain EO is fucking amazing and I hope it sticks around for a while.
It is pure 80s nostalgia, like someone dug up a can of 80s from a closet long after they had ceased making it, and you all sat down to enjoy one last fresh taste. Francis Ford Coppola! George Lucas! Muppets! Terrible greenscreening and the oldschool 80s version of 3D with motion chairs that force you to chair dance to 'Another Part of Me'! (Yo Disney, I don't need encouragement for that, you know what I'm sayin'?)
So Michael Jackson is the Captain of a Muppet crew in a quasi-Star Wars universe. They have to deliver something to the 'Supreme Leader', who turns out to be a Borg Queen. Naturally, after they have many misadventures with something shooting at them, a holovid bossguy screaming and the Muppets making 'whoops, aren't we adorable' gags. And the Queen is pissed so the Muppet robots turn into musical instruments, so that Michael Jackson can have a dance off, while turning a bunch of Borg Drones into backup dancers through the power of song and sparkling lights.
And at the very end? The Borg Queen is revealed to have been Angelica Huston. Angelica Huston! How could I have ever crapped on such a thing of pure magnificence?
Picard never hit Q, but Picard also never defeated the Borg Queen through the power of song. Hence I am forced to conclude this: Michael Jackson is the true secret badass of all science fiction.
You all should go see it. It's rad, especially because everyone in the audience is in their early 30s/later 20s and thus remembers going to see it the first time/loving Michael Jackson/loving shit exactly like this during their misbegotten youth. The audience participation will give you a contact high of love.
Also, if you go, hit up the Star Tours on your way out if you ever loved it. They're scrapping it to replace it with Star Tours II: Now With More Pod-Racing! I am horribly depressed.
The reason we went to Disneyland, aside from forcing a toddler to mug for pictures: CAPTAIN MOTHERFUCKING EO. Noelle's a big MJ stan - in fact, Tomorrowland was full of them. The Captain EO tribute only reopened last weekend so there were still Michael Jackson cosplayers and people with original merchandise roaming around. It was actually pretty cute.
I remember thinking that Captain EO was goddamn awful as a kid. It doesn't help that it was next to my most favoritest ride ever: Star Tours. My parents always wanted to go see Captain EO and I was like, 'NO DAMMIT MICHAEL JACKSON TOUCHES LITTLE CHILDREN, HE'S A PERV.' So they would get in the no-line for Captain EO and I would spend dumb money on Star Wars crap until they were done.
Okay so the point I'm coming to is this: I take it back. I take it all back. Captain EO is fucking amazing and I hope it sticks around for a while.
It is pure 80s nostalgia, like someone dug up a can of 80s from a closet long after they had ceased making it, and you all sat down to enjoy one last fresh taste. Francis Ford Coppola! George Lucas! Muppets! Terrible greenscreening and the oldschool 80s version of 3D with motion chairs that force you to chair dance to 'Another Part of Me'! (Yo Disney, I don't need encouragement for that, you know what I'm sayin'?)
So Michael Jackson is the Captain of a Muppet crew in a quasi-Star Wars universe. They have to deliver something to the 'Supreme Leader', who turns out to be a Borg Queen. Naturally, after they have many misadventures with something shooting at them, a holovid bossguy screaming and the Muppets making 'whoops, aren't we adorable' gags. And the Queen is pissed so the Muppet robots turn into musical instruments, so that Michael Jackson can have a dance off, while turning a bunch of Borg Drones into backup dancers through the power of song and sparkling lights.
And at the very end? The Borg Queen is revealed to have been Angelica Huston. Angelica Huston! How could I have ever crapped on such a thing of pure magnificence?
Picard never hit Q, but Picard also never defeated the Borg Queen through the power of song. Hence I am forced to conclude this: Michael Jackson is the true secret badass of all science fiction.
You all should go see it. It's rad, especially because everyone in the audience is in their early 30s/later 20s and thus remembers going to see it the first time/loving Michael Jackson/loving shit exactly like this during their misbegotten youth. The audience participation will give you a contact high of love.
Also, if you go, hit up the Star Tours on your way out if you ever loved it. They're scrapping it to replace it with Star Tours II: Now With More Pod-Racing! I am horribly depressed.