You are not a nuisance, and you are not doing anything Wrong to ask questions, I promise.
I think that the reason that there was no warning on the post itself in the easily-seen post text as an OOC is because the organizers knew in advance about this, gave consent, and put Chuck's 'donation' in a thread at the very beginning, and thought they had made the event 'avoidable' by letting people opt-out at the meeting by just not eating the brownies.
Sadly, they underestimated the Fandom Gossip Tree, and the dang squirrels, very similar to what happened with Raven getting bitten by a vampire awhile back. It spiraled beyond the original players and the entire island ended up hearing about it one way or another.
I know recreational drug users who have never had a problem. I know people who have had drugs ruin their entire lives. And I agree with you that it is a very trigger-y issue. I have tried to only touch very very lightly on Emma's problems with sleeping pills and her family's drug abuse, because while it is all canon, I am aware it is Problematic for many people. It's also why I tread carefully with the abuse Anemone underwent. Hell, Emma's family could be considered one big ball of triggery issues for many people. But I've discovered that sometimes it goes places in comment-threads that I need to address, and I don't always remember to go back and edit the original post. Which, is by no means an excuse, and I thank you for this reminder that I SHOULD be more diligent in what I put in OOC and my tags.
I think a great deal of it stems from pot being seen as a 'victimless drug,' which, I know some people will argue differently. It's not to my personal tastes, as the smoke actually gives me migraines, but I have (and probably will) baked Magic Brownies for people in the past, and will in the future, as my boyfriend suffers from severe glaucoma, and his doctors have told him to take it under-the-table, since medical marijuana is not approved in our state. But I would never dream of giving them to anyone who DID NOT KNOW what they were. That would be a violation of a person, just as much as physical violence would be.
On a more technical note, if we're worried about LJ cracking down on us for smutty content, hence putting things in personal journals, preferably with an LJ cut and flocked, we should be equally as concerned with illicit substances in an open, public, community. I will be the first one to stand up and yell, LOUDLY, that censorship laws are of the Dumb and Stupid and often violating people's rights, but for now we need to abide by them, and be aware that we ARE findable by minors. Even if we disagree on what is or is not triggery, we have a responsibility to not get ourselves shut-down, should some irate parent discover that their underage child has been reading this game, waiting for when they can app.
Which is probably a tl;dr way of saying you are not over-reacting, and it's probably something that we, as a whole, need to look at and remember that everyone has different limits.
So, I'm the world's slowest commenter back, but I wanted to get to this one for sure.
I can freely admit that I'm not a fan of any sort of recreational drug use in my personal life. Which is my shiny own personal right just like using pot is a lot of other peoples' shiny personal rights and choices.
There's been unwarned for drug use in the game before (though I have to admit, I've never noticed it from Emma) and I've reacted IRL poorly. But they've been mostly isolated posts that weren't treated as a game/something good (bad-but-good, yes, but that's a different scenario) and, well, honestly in this case? My consent issues are probably pinging harder than the drug use. Which is the same thing as the last time this happened and Chuck drugged his cabin. That got much the same reaction from me.
But it's icky and messed up with the situation and the general acceptance of the inability to consent in the game really threw me for a loop. As well as the lack of significant consequences to his actions. (I know he's been turned into a girl. I... don't feel that evens out drugging people without their consent so... yeah.)
But, all my triggers beside the point, all I particularly want out of the game is a warning on the posts that have common triggery issues in them. Lack of consent and drug abuse are two pretty common triggers--I'd say they're very nearly as common as violence and rape and alcoholism, actually--so... yeah. Wow this is incoherent. I am so sorry if none of this makes sense and thank you for answering and for, well, not making me feel silly. I seriously appreciate it.
You should never, ever, feel silly for speaking up about something that bothers you. Ever. If you aren't sure if you're over-reacting, you should do exactly what you did. Email me, chat with Shannon, poke Nuance, talk with people. We're not just other players, we're your friends, and we'll be honest with you, because I know you'd be honest with us.
Since there's always going to the issue of what is / is not triggery for people, in regards to recreational activities of all types, since we are from all over the world, I'm wondering if the best course of action would be to add 'dubious consent' to the list from the OF. Consent isn't just sexual, after all, and it sounds like that's the biggest hitting point for you (and for a lot of people, IMHO). Which, I'll admit, I was out-of-town for the last OF & the roundup afterwards, so I had no idea such a list existed. (Thanks, MP, for posting it on the userinfo!) This is very much why I am sadface that the wiki went down, because for a new player? The rules for the game can be very confusing, and they aren't always all in one place.
We're never going to get everyone to agree to everything, and I do agree with Erin that we can't put half the game behind a cut-tag, but I think that if we take it step-by-step and encourage people to think critically about what they're posting where, it won't just help make the game a better place, but it might improve our own writing and help facilitate player-to-player communication. For the most part, we're a shy group of people who are usually anxious about tagging/emailing/IMing each other, and maybe seeing very human reactions (like yours) will help ease some of the nameless, faceless dread of interacting OOC-ly with each other.
I think that the reason that there was no warning on the post itself in the easily-seen post text as an OOC is because the organizers knew in advance about this, gave consent, and put Chuck's 'donation' in a thread at the very beginning, and thought they had made the event 'avoidable' by letting people opt-out at the meeting by just not eating the brownies.
Sadly, they underestimated the Fandom Gossip Tree, and the dang squirrels, very similar to what happened with Raven getting bitten by a vampire awhile back. It spiraled beyond the original players and the entire island ended up hearing about it one way or another.
I know recreational drug users who have never had a problem. I know people who have had drugs ruin their entire lives. And I agree with you that it is a very trigger-y issue. I have tried to only touch very very lightly on Emma's problems with sleeping pills and her family's drug abuse, because while it is all canon, I am aware it is Problematic for many people. It's also why I tread carefully with the abuse Anemone underwent. Hell, Emma's family could be considered one big ball of triggery issues for many people. But I've discovered that sometimes it goes places in comment-threads that I need to address, and I don't always remember to go back and edit the original post. Which, is by no means an excuse, and I thank you for this reminder that I SHOULD be more diligent in what I put in OOC and my tags.
I think a great deal of it stems from pot being seen as a 'victimless drug,' which, I know some people will argue differently. It's not to my personal tastes, as the smoke actually gives me migraines, but I have (and probably will) baked Magic Brownies for people in the past, and will in the future, as my boyfriend suffers from severe glaucoma, and his doctors have told him to take it under-the-table, since medical marijuana is not approved in our state. But I would never dream of giving them to anyone who DID NOT KNOW what they were. That would be a violation of a person, just as much as physical violence would be.
On a more technical note, if we're worried about LJ cracking down on us for smutty content, hence putting things in personal journals, preferably with an LJ cut and flocked, we should be equally as concerned with illicit substances in an open, public, community. I will be the first one to stand up and yell, LOUDLY, that censorship laws are of the Dumb and Stupid and often violating people's rights, but for now we need to abide by them, and be aware that we ARE findable by minors. Even if we disagree on what is or is not triggery, we have a responsibility to not get ourselves shut-down, should some irate parent discover that their underage child has been reading this game, waiting for when they can app.
Which is probably a tl;dr way of saying you are not over-reacting, and it's probably something that we, as a whole, need to look at and remember that everyone has different limits.
Reply
I can freely admit that I'm not a fan of any sort of recreational drug use in my personal life. Which is my shiny own personal right just like using pot is a lot of other peoples' shiny personal rights and choices.
There's been unwarned for drug use in the game before (though I have to admit, I've never noticed it from Emma) and I've reacted IRL poorly. But they've been mostly isolated posts that weren't treated as a game/something good (bad-but-good, yes, but that's a different scenario) and, well, honestly in this case? My consent issues are probably pinging harder than the drug use. Which is the same thing as the last time this happened and Chuck drugged his cabin. That got much the same reaction from me.
But it's icky and messed up with the situation and the general acceptance of the inability to consent in the game really threw me for a loop. As well as the lack of significant consequences to his actions. (I know he's been turned into a girl. I... don't feel that evens out drugging people without their consent so... yeah.)
But, all my triggers beside the point, all I particularly want out of the game is a warning on the posts that have common triggery issues in them. Lack of consent and drug abuse are two pretty common triggers--I'd say they're very nearly as common as violence and rape and alcoholism, actually--so... yeah. Wow this is incoherent. I am so sorry if none of this makes sense and thank you for answering and for, well, not making me feel silly. I seriously appreciate it.
Reply
Since there's always going to the issue of what is / is not triggery for people, in regards to recreational activities of all types, since we are from all over the world, I'm wondering if the best course of action would be to add 'dubious consent' to the list from the OF. Consent isn't just sexual, after all, and it sounds like that's the biggest hitting point for you (and for a lot of people, IMHO). Which, I'll admit, I was out-of-town for the last OF & the roundup afterwards, so I had no idea such a list existed. (Thanks, MP, for posting it on the userinfo!) This is very much why I am sadface that the wiki went down, because for a new player? The rules for the game can be very confusing, and they aren't always all in one place.
We're never going to get everyone to agree to everything, and I do agree with Erin that we can't put half the game behind a cut-tag, but I think that if we take it step-by-step and encourage people to think critically about what they're posting where, it won't just help make the game a better place, but it might improve our own writing and help facilitate player-to-player communication. For the most part, we're a shy group of people who are usually anxious about tagging/emailing/IMing each other, and maybe seeing very human reactions (like yours) will help ease some of the nameless, faceless dread of interacting OOC-ly with each other.
Reply
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