why i decided to drop everything and run
i entered this world with infinite possibilities and, like centering down from another galaxy to the atoms within your skin, realized that everything breaks up into infinite pieces.
the path you take is not always the path you choose, but the path you never venture on, even if you hear some fuckin beautiful thing calling in the distance [yet choose to ignore, for whatever reason], is one you consciously do not choose. unconscious decisions bring me the most solitude, the most confidence.
i suppose i thrive in the inevitability of certain things. ultimatums scare the shit out of me, but the most scary thought i can imagine having when i am an old man is that of "fuck sky, you should have taken more chances."
giving has always come before taking for me. i prefer to hand myself over to someone else in return for their happiness. but i won't feel guilty taking something intangible, something that is created by myself in order for me to reach out for it.
for once, i'd like to open up my skin and run through uncertainty. just absorb all the bacteria and disease and shit. and know what it is like to trust yourself.
be an amoeba. be all encompassing. be the world.. be the change. make a change. it all surrounds me, completes me, destroys me.
nothing is truly easy, and i will miss this.. i mean.
skidmore has given me a home. skidmore has given me a family.
and i'm going to take that with me when i venture off into the unknown.
i don't know what's in front of me [and that scares the shit out of me],
but i do know what is behind me. and i'll always be turning back to smile.
we should always know that we can do anything.
in the end, i have decided to transfer to massart. i'm not even sure how long i will last there - i know i need to be in the world, doing something. someday, i will float around from farm to farm or i will be an art teacher. but right now, i need to be somewhere where my heart is. i love skidmore, but i don't think i'm living skidmore. i live and breathe for the distance that is farther away, for that complexity in the city. my thoughts are constantly over there, or elsewhere, and i feel as though once i connect my heart, my mind, and my body, i will be able to grow.
plus i just want to make shit, you know? :]
the path you take is not always the path you choose, but the path you never venture on, even if you hear some fuckin beautiful thing calling in the distance [yet choose to ignore, for whatever reason], is one you consciously do not choose. unconscious decisions bring me the most solitude, the most confidence.
i suppose i thrive in the inevitability of certain things. ultimatums scare the shit out of me, but the most scary thought i can imagine having when i am an old man is that of "fuck sky, you should have taken more chances."
giving has always come before taking for me. i prefer to hand myself over to someone else in return for their happiness. but i won't feel guilty taking something intangible, something that is created by myself in order for me to reach out for it.
for once, i'd like to open up my skin and run through uncertainty. just absorb all the bacteria and disease and shit. and know what it is like to trust yourself.
be an amoeba. be all encompassing. be the world.. be the change. make a change. it all surrounds me, completes me, destroys me.
nothing is truly easy, and i will miss this.. i mean.
skidmore has given me a home. skidmore has given me a family.
and i'm going to take that with me when i venture off into the unknown.
i don't know what's in front of me [and that scares the shit out of me],
but i do know what is behind me. and i'll always be turning back to smile.
we should always know that we can do anything.
in the end, i have decided to transfer to massart. i'm not even sure how long i will last there - i know i need to be in the world, doing something. someday, i will float around from farm to farm or i will be an art teacher. but right now, i need to be somewhere where my heart is. i love skidmore, but i don't think i'm living skidmore. i live and breathe for the distance that is farther away, for that complexity in the city. my thoughts are constantly over there, or elsewhere, and i feel as though once i connect my heart, my mind, and my body, i will be able to grow.
plus i just want to make shit, you know? :]