I don't believe what "they" say.
So the other day I was thinking.
Holding back from assenting to the existence of God around others becomes exhausting. It sometimes makes me feel sick and tired, like I’ve been fake in living my life; playing some game. How many times do people question whether the food they eat, the people they meet, or what they see in the sky is real? Then comes the argument, can we see God, taste or touch or hear this thing called God? We can see his words in the bible, or hear them or even get the messages God tries to send through people or things without sound. We can observe the concrete-ness of God through matter and energy, magnetic and gravitational forces, the physics of the sky and earth and water, and living organisms. We can experience the abstract of God through beauty and art and love and imagination and philosophy (like the very next sentence ->). But how do you KNOW? And that is the kind of existential hoop-jumping that I’m talking about. How long do I have to put up this act or else be labeled the oppressive idiot?
People say, and to their credit I’d guess many genuinely think that all they want is to experience God before they say God exists. Yet they do or could do this all the time. People say that if they could just see a sign or a miracle or some kind of proof then that would be enough, but it’s been there all along. No, they want something Old Testament-style to happen today for them, guaranteed the hand of God; they want to see Jesus pop up out of nowhere and say it’s all true. But I can’t believe these people anymore. I don’t think that even those things would do it for them, because how much “proof” would ever be enough? They would disbelieve it ever happened after a day or an hour or after talking with anyone else who had doubts. What they really want is to see the face of God and not fear it, to have God answer every question or solve every problem that each of the 6 billion+ people in the world could think of, and do it daily, in a completely satisfying way. People don’t want to “be able to” believe in God, they want to be Gods. And when we can’t, we childishly pretend God doesn’t exist. The kind of “proof” they want would disprove God. “If god really loved me, he would be my slave.” He has.
Holding back from assenting to the existence of God around others becomes exhausting. It sometimes makes me feel sick and tired, like I’ve been fake in living my life; playing some game. How many times do people question whether the food they eat, the people they meet, or what they see in the sky is real? Then comes the argument, can we see God, taste or touch or hear this thing called God? We can see his words in the bible, or hear them or even get the messages God tries to send through people or things without sound. We can observe the concrete-ness of God through matter and energy, magnetic and gravitational forces, the physics of the sky and earth and water, and living organisms. We can experience the abstract of God through beauty and art and love and imagination and philosophy (like the very next sentence ->). But how do you KNOW? And that is the kind of existential hoop-jumping that I’m talking about. How long do I have to put up this act or else be labeled the oppressive idiot?
People say, and to their credit I’d guess many genuinely think that all they want is to experience God before they say God exists. Yet they do or could do this all the time. People say that if they could just see a sign or a miracle or some kind of proof then that would be enough, but it’s been there all along. No, they want something Old Testament-style to happen today for them, guaranteed the hand of God; they want to see Jesus pop up out of nowhere and say it’s all true. But I can’t believe these people anymore. I don’t think that even those things would do it for them, because how much “proof” would ever be enough? They would disbelieve it ever happened after a day or an hour or after talking with anyone else who had doubts. What they really want is to see the face of God and not fear it, to have God answer every question or solve every problem that each of the 6 billion+ people in the world could think of, and do it daily, in a completely satisfying way. People don’t want to “be able to” believe in God, they want to be Gods. And when we can’t, we childishly pretend God doesn’t exist. The kind of “proof” they want would disprove God. “If god really loved me, he would be my slave.” He has.