Crack Theatre - Insidious Trap
Title: Crack Theatre - Insidious Trap
Rating: NC-17 for Plushie Smut
Warning: Dude, plushie smut.
Ed: Get me an insulin shot, my cute level has overloaded.
Envy: OMG, teehee, look I'm the adorable chibi Envy from the OAV!
Ed: That's a likely story, althought you do have little rosy cheeks and lovely lavender eyes I could fall into... NO IT'S SOME INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING TRAP!
Envy: But look Ed, look into my adorable lovely lavender chibi eyes, they are quite irresistable, you know you want to gaze at me wantonly and have thoughts that make your wee wee become a woodie <3
Ed: That's not true! My wee wee would never be a woodie because of you! There is only one plushie here who gives me fiber filled wood! But, um, what is that cologne you are wearing! IT'S AN INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEROMONE EXUDING TRAP!
Envy: Not at all, but I'm told even my lovely, tight, paradise like sphincter even smells nice, want a whiff?
Ed: THE FUCK? NO! ...it does smell kind of NO IT'S SOME INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEREMONE EXUDING SPHINCTER SPRITZING LIKE A DOG MARKING TERRITORY TRAP!
Envy: You smell pheremoney, too! <3 Let me just lick at your nipples! I bet that is one of your g-spots!
Ed: What?! NO! Get off me... to the left damn it and up a bit...NO IT'S SOME INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEREMONE EXUDING SPHINCTER SPRITIZING LIKE A DOG NIPPLE LAPPING TRAP!
Ed: OK YOU! That's enough, I'm going to throw you over on your stomach and I'm going to plug this hole up so no one can be lured in by your INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEREMONE EXUDING SPHINCTER SPRITZING LIKE A DOG NIPPLE LAPPING way!
Envy: TEEHEE! On the first date! <3
Roy: Hi Boys, I heard a commotion, anything going on I should know about?
Envy: I'm putting out on my first date! <3
Ed: Stay back Roy! It's a INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEREMONE EXUDING SPHINCTER SPRITZING LIKE A DOG NIPPLE LAPPING PRETENDING TO BE A VIRIGIN TRAP!
Roy: A virgin? So tell me, is this really your first date? I mean, on a scale of 1 to 10, how far did you two get before I got here?
Envy: Oh, but, I'm not sure I should tell, after all, I'm here on Ed's arm...
Ed: THE FUCK?! He's not, we got to -5 if you wanna know anything about it, I keep telling you it's a INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEREMONE EXUDING SPHINCTER SPRITZING LIKE A DOG NIPPLE LAPPING PRETENDING TO BE A VIRIGIN TRAP AND MAKING A SUCKER OUT OF YOU TRAP!
Roy: You know, Fullmetal, I think you do protest to much. Think of the cause here, Edward. We could be ridding the world of some insidious evil here. We should inpsect this homunculous throughly to find his weakiness.
Ed: *gulp* Um, well, I mean, if you put it that way... could you like rub all over me while we inspect the homunculus?
Envy: TEEHEE!
Ed: WAIT! It's a INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEREMONE EXUDING SPHINCTER SPRITZING LIKE A DOG NIPPLE LAPPING PRETENDING TO BE A VIRIGIN AND MAKING A SUCKER OUT OF YOU AND NOW YOU'RE TRYING TO SEDUCE ME INTO AIDING AND ABEDING TRAP!
Al: HI! Hi everyone in LJ land!
Al: I have a kitty. See? Her name is Kitty <33333
Roy: That's it, that's it. If you really want to know about human culture so you'll blend right in, you have to know the proper courting procedures.
Envy: Well, I supposedly do WANT to be a human, or that's at least what Studio Bones keeps telling me...
Ed: I'll show you the proper techinque for courting from the back...
Roy: Don't stop with the mouth greeting while Ed shows you the bend over and spread them greeting....
Sky: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS THING?! HOW DID IT GET IN HERE?! ARE THE TRAPS NOT WORKING?! EW! GET AWAY FROM MY ROY AND ED PLUSHIES YOU INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEREMONE EXUDING SPHINCTER SPRITZING LIKE A DOG NIPPLE LAPPING PRETENDING TO BE A VIRIGIN AND MAKING A SUCKER OUT OF YOU AND NOW YOU'RE TRYING TO SEDUCE ME INTO AIDING AND ABEDING TOUCHING MY PLUSHIES IN AN INAPPROPRIATE FASHION AND NOW I'LL HAVE TO FUMIGATE THEM THING!
Ed and Roy: *inno*
Envy: Wheee!
Envy: Oh no, the floor is a cold and lonely place to be! My chibiness shall keep me warm!
Sky: IT'S STILL MOVING! STOMP IT!
Random Foot O' Doom: *squish*
Envy: *Expire*
Roy: Well, I guess we can continue our research in private.
Ed: I guess.
Sky: My poor plushies, are you traumatized? Do you need to go to a rape center?
Roy: Give us about 20 mintues, then Ed will need to go.
Ed: What? Again?
~The End~
Rating: NC-17 for Plushie Smut
Warning: Dude, plushie smut.
Ed: Get me an insulin shot, my cute level has overloaded.
Envy: OMG, teehee, look I'm the adorable chibi Envy from the OAV!
Ed: That's a likely story, althought you do have little rosy cheeks and lovely lavender eyes I could fall into... NO IT'S SOME INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING TRAP!
Envy: But look Ed, look into my adorable lovely lavender chibi eyes, they are quite irresistable, you know you want to gaze at me wantonly and have thoughts that make your wee wee become a woodie <3
Ed: That's not true! My wee wee would never be a woodie because of you! There is only one plushie here who gives me fiber filled wood! But, um, what is that cologne you are wearing! IT'S AN INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEROMONE EXUDING TRAP!
Envy: Not at all, but I'm told even my lovely, tight, paradise like sphincter even smells nice, want a whiff?
Ed: THE FUCK? NO! ...it does smell kind of NO IT'S SOME INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEREMONE EXUDING SPHINCTER SPRITZING LIKE A DOG MARKING TERRITORY TRAP!
Envy: You smell pheremoney, too! <3 Let me just lick at your nipples! I bet that is one of your g-spots!
Ed: What?! NO! Get off me... to the left damn it and up a bit...NO IT'S SOME INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEREMONE EXUDING SPHINCTER SPRITIZING LIKE A DOG NIPPLE LAPPING TRAP!
Ed: OK YOU! That's enough, I'm going to throw you over on your stomach and I'm going to plug this hole up so no one can be lured in by your INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEREMONE EXUDING SPHINCTER SPRITZING LIKE A DOG NIPPLE LAPPING way!
Envy: TEEHEE! On the first date! <3
Roy: Hi Boys, I heard a commotion, anything going on I should know about?
Envy: I'm putting out on my first date! <3
Ed: Stay back Roy! It's a INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEREMONE EXUDING SPHINCTER SPRITZING LIKE A DOG NIPPLE LAPPING PRETENDING TO BE A VIRIGIN TRAP!
Roy: A virgin? So tell me, is this really your first date? I mean, on a scale of 1 to 10, how far did you two get before I got here?
Envy: Oh, but, I'm not sure I should tell, after all, I'm here on Ed's arm...
Ed: THE FUCK?! He's not, we got to -5 if you wanna know anything about it, I keep telling you it's a INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEREMONE EXUDING SPHINCTER SPRITZING LIKE A DOG NIPPLE LAPPING PRETENDING TO BE A VIRIGIN TRAP AND MAKING A SUCKER OUT OF YOU TRAP!
Roy: You know, Fullmetal, I think you do protest to much. Think of the cause here, Edward. We could be ridding the world of some insidious evil here. We should inpsect this homunculous throughly to find his weakiness.
Ed: *gulp* Um, well, I mean, if you put it that way... could you like rub all over me while we inspect the homunculus?
Envy: TEEHEE!
Ed: WAIT! It's a INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEREMONE EXUDING SPHINCTER SPRITZING LIKE A DOG NIPPLE LAPPING PRETENDING TO BE A VIRIGIN AND MAKING A SUCKER OUT OF YOU AND NOW YOU'RE TRYING TO SEDUCE ME INTO AIDING AND ABEDING TRAP!
Al: HI! Hi everyone in LJ land!
Al: I have a kitty. See? Her name is Kitty <33333
Roy: That's it, that's it. If you really want to know about human culture so you'll blend right in, you have to know the proper courting procedures.
Envy: Well, I supposedly do WANT to be a human, or that's at least what Studio Bones keeps telling me...
Ed: I'll show you the proper techinque for courting from the back...
Roy: Don't stop with the mouth greeting while Ed shows you the bend over and spread them greeting....
Sky: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS THING?! HOW DID IT GET IN HERE?! ARE THE TRAPS NOT WORKING?! EW! GET AWAY FROM MY ROY AND ED PLUSHIES YOU INSIDIOUS SHAPE SHIFTING PHEREMONE EXUDING SPHINCTER SPRITZING LIKE A DOG NIPPLE LAPPING PRETENDING TO BE A VIRIGIN AND MAKING A SUCKER OUT OF YOU AND NOW YOU'RE TRYING TO SEDUCE ME INTO AIDING AND ABEDING TOUCHING MY PLUSHIES IN AN INAPPROPRIATE FASHION AND NOW I'LL HAVE TO FUMIGATE THEM THING!
Ed and Roy: *inno*
Envy: Wheee!
Envy: Oh no, the floor is a cold and lonely place to be! My chibiness shall keep me warm!
Sky: IT'S STILL MOVING! STOMP IT!
Random Foot O' Doom: *squish*
Envy: *Expire*
Roy: Well, I guess we can continue our research in private.
Ed: I guess.
Sky: My poor plushies, are you traumatized? Do you need to go to a rape center?
Roy: Give us about 20 mintues, then Ed will need to go.
Ed: What? Again?
~The End~