Well, here we go
I feel so alone. I only have a few friends. My girlfriend being the closest is really the only person I feel like I can talk to. No one else understands. Its so hard, because Im trying my very best to be the best example I can, uphold my witness, and do all I can to be Godly and positively influence people, but its hard. Those who were once there to help me through it and try their best to do the same arent there anymore. I havent felt this alone in a long time. Its really hard. I think that this is God teaching me not only patience, but perserverence as well. If it werent for the chapters I read in my Bible at night, I wouldnt be making it through. I fear that God is really gonna send a wake up call to a few people, and Im scared for it. For the first time in a while, I genuinely have a great fear of the Lord, and its awesome, but at the same time scary. Im not sure what to do, but I hope that God will bless my efforts to help out my friends, even if I dont want to because I dont feel like they've helped me, at all. But I am also aware that this very point, that I'm not recieving anything in return, is a true example of Christ-likeness, and God is teaching me to be more like that, cuz I know Im not. Pray for me if you read this, and I will for you, and remember that He's always watching, so live like your life is on camera.