12/365 - Kirk's Dick
Kirk’s big dick was three feet long
As thick as baseball bats
Though James T Kirk boned everything
His Jimmy wore no hats
STD’s from outer space
Now rock the cock of Kirk
Females fell in hapless hordes
Towards that charming smirk
6 and thirty inches long
Each inch of cock diseased
His member’s mostly mortified
From all the ones he’s pleased
Those green sores are hot to touch
And blink like spider eyes
And over here a patch of blue
That daily grows in size
Herpes from Orion girls
Form some emerald scabs
Over there the skittering
Of slightly psychic crabs
The end of Kirk’s huge member has
A constant, stinging dribble
The dude had sex with everything
He even fucked a tribble
He’s gotten cures for what he can
From Federation bases
Shots and pills and hypo sprays
For all the separate cases
But most of the infections here
Are mysteries to us
A Tholian infection there
That’s dripping sparkly pus
He boldly went and boldly came
Where no man came before
Slaves and robots, ensigns, teens
Females by the score
Andorians and Romulans
Vulcans, Gorns, Iotians
If Kirk’s ejaculate was saved
It would have filled two oceans
Was this man a slut machine?
A horndog? Kinda. Sorta.
I heard one time on Klingon wine
He even fucked a horta.
Ports and storms, the saying goes
In every port a floozy
Landing parties partied on
He wasn’t even choosy
Now the space Lothario
The Casanova Kirk
The Romeo Rasputin-dicked
Nympho-manic jerk
Contends with constant penis pain
On every itching inch
And swarms of angry aliens
Now want a Kirk to lynch
Kirk’s new mission? Run and hide
From angry, angry exes
All-colours-of-the-rainbow-skinned
In ships the size of Texas
Out of wedlock children searching
For a father chase him
Jealous boyfriends, fathers, sons,
All want to erase him
The problem is that Kirk’s ‘explored’
in every single system
Every planet’s touched his cock
And every woman’s kissed him
So Kirk can’t hide for very long
This justice he can’t duck
It’s what he gets for beaming down
With phasers set to fuck
Good luck Jim, you horny fool
You randy, silly goose
I hope your cock’s not long enough
For them to make a noose
tags
As thick as baseball bats
Though James T Kirk boned everything
His Jimmy wore no hats
STD’s from outer space
Now rock the cock of Kirk
Females fell in hapless hordes
Towards that charming smirk
6 and thirty inches long
Each inch of cock diseased
His member’s mostly mortified
From all the ones he’s pleased
Those green sores are hot to touch
And blink like spider eyes
And over here a patch of blue
That daily grows in size
Herpes from Orion girls
Form some emerald scabs
Over there the skittering
Of slightly psychic crabs
The end of Kirk’s huge member has
A constant, stinging dribble
The dude had sex with everything
He even fucked a tribble
He’s gotten cures for what he can
From Federation bases
Shots and pills and hypo sprays
For all the separate cases
But most of the infections here
Are mysteries to us
A Tholian infection there
That’s dripping sparkly pus
He boldly went and boldly came
Where no man came before
Slaves and robots, ensigns, teens
Females by the score
Andorians and Romulans
Vulcans, Gorns, Iotians
If Kirk’s ejaculate was saved
It would have filled two oceans
Was this man a slut machine?
A horndog? Kinda. Sorta.
I heard one time on Klingon wine
He even fucked a horta.
Ports and storms, the saying goes
In every port a floozy
Landing parties partied on
He wasn’t even choosy
Now the space Lothario
The Casanova Kirk
The Romeo Rasputin-dicked
Nympho-manic jerk
Contends with constant penis pain
On every itching inch
And swarms of angry aliens
Now want a Kirk to lynch
Kirk’s new mission? Run and hide
From angry, angry exes
All-colours-of-the-rainbow-skinned
In ships the size of Texas
Out of wedlock children searching
For a father chase him
Jealous boyfriends, fathers, sons,
All want to erase him
The problem is that Kirk’s ‘explored’
in every single system
Every planet’s touched his cock
And every woman’s kissed him
So Kirk can’t hide for very long
This justice he can’t duck
It’s what he gets for beaming down
With phasers set to fuck
Good luck Jim, you horny fool
You randy, silly goose
I hope your cock’s not long enough
For them to make a noose
tags