Your plot and writing skills are fantastic. I love Norris and have always thought he should have had a bigger part in Vee's life. I totally adored Cassidy's maturation in this fic - I could "see" him as I read your words. And yea! for former Deputy Leo. He's such a great guy, and I love the way you twisted the "Leo-stoled-the-tapes" story into something more, and in such a cool way. Truly, your plot intricacies are superb. *bows in awe* I can completely see how this would have been done in chapters - it's terrific as it is, but would have been really cool doled out in pieces.
A couple of things: I suspect the plot would have been easier to follow had you finished it the way you started, that is, in smaller bites. I'm thrilled you finished at all, I appreciate the work you put into your story, and I don't intend to be critical, but I'm guessing the long confessional/expository scene(s) between Logan and Veronica were meant to be done as action rather than explanation. Also, I realize when you write fic, it's your world to create, but I thought everyone's attitude toward Logan, particularly Veronica's, was a bit over-the-top. I'm not saying Logan & Veronica should have ended up together, because I buy that it was not appropriate, but I thought the whole "it's all Logan's fault" stuff was one-sided. Maybe I'm a Logan apologist, but he did have reasons for most of the things he did, and he does have a totally screwed-up, brutal and abusive father, an alcoholic mother, and a rotten childhood. And, frankly, Veronica was not blameless and Duncan's never going to be a saint.
But that's just my opinion. This was so fun to read, and I love the way you incorporated and altered events from the show. Your take was so unique and it's a wonderful read. Thanks for finishing - I was dying to know what happened - and thanks for sharing.
Thank you so much for taking the time to write such detailed feedback. I really appreciate that. Yes, originally the last chapter was going to be 3 chapters - Logan goes to the Casablancas house and 1) Talks to Dick - finds out about Betina, 2) Talks to Kendall - finds out she was the "witness" and more detail on the Duncan/Kendall rendezvous 3) Sneaks into Cassidy's room while he's in the shower to copy all the phone numbers in his call log.
This chapter was going to be 5 - 6 chapters with Logan following up on the phone numbers - seeing Leo with his sister, going to the convalescence home, following Leo to the Coast Guard, etc.
If I had the time I would have laid out all the clues so that there would not have been so much expositions. As for the 'Veronica blames Logan' - well, she always does. Logan is wrong until proven right and Duncan is right until proven wrong.
But I didn't want to leave readers hanging while I am on my writing hiatus. I hope the story at least made sense.
A couple of things: I suspect the plot would have been easier to follow had you finished it the way you started, that is, in smaller bites. I'm thrilled you finished at all, I appreciate the work you put into your story, and I don't intend to be critical, but I'm guessing the long confessional/expository scene(s) between Logan and Veronica were meant to be done as action rather than explanation. Also, I realize when you write fic, it's your world to create, but I thought everyone's attitude toward Logan, particularly Veronica's, was a bit over-the-top. I'm not saying Logan & Veronica should have ended up together, because I buy that it was not appropriate, but I thought the whole "it's all Logan's fault" stuff was one-sided. Maybe I'm a Logan apologist, but he did have reasons for most of the things he did, and he does have a totally screwed-up, brutal and abusive father, an alcoholic mother, and a rotten childhood. And, frankly, Veronica was not blameless and Duncan's never going to be a saint.
But that's just my opinion. This was so fun to read, and I love the way you incorporated and altered events from the show. Your take was so unique and it's a wonderful read. Thanks for finishing - I was dying to know what happened - and thanks for sharing.
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This chapter was going to be 5 - 6 chapters with Logan following up on the phone numbers - seeing Leo with his sister, going to the convalescence home, following Leo to the Coast Guard, etc.
If I had the time I would have laid out all the clues so that there would not have been so much expositions. As for the 'Veronica blames Logan' - well, she always does. Logan is wrong until proven right and Duncan is right until proven wrong.
But I didn't want to leave readers hanging while I am on my writing hiatus. I hope the story at least made sense.
Reply
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