Deathday Party: Consequences
Morning all. I'm back!
I had a fabulous week with some utterly fabulous people. I'm working on catching up with my flist (no internet for a week!). And yes, I'd do it all again. (In fact, the lack of internet led to 5000 words of High School Musical fic, but more on that later. I'm still a bit shell-shocked by it, tbh)
Anyway, we played some marvellous games of Consequences. For those unfamiliar with the game: each person has a piece of paper. They write the name of a character/person at the top and fold it over so the name is hidden. Then the papers are passed on to the next person. They then write another person's name, fold over and pass on. The game continues thus (in the version we played - HPsoccers, we have a new recipe):
[First person] met
[Second person] at
[Time/Place]
[First person said]
[Second person said]
[First person gave second person]
[Second person gave first person]
[The next day...]
[The consequence was...]
Then the papers are unrolled and read out, hopefully to much hilarity.
Got it? Good. Here are some of our better efforts.
Petunia met
Pansy Parkinson at
Noon.
Petunia said, “Let me give you a wheeze.”
Pansy said, “Only if you do it first.”
Petunia gave Pansy a lesson in washing-up, Muggle-style.
Pansy gave Petunia the rest of the bottle of Ogdens.
The next day they parted ways, satisfied.
The consequence was: they both had to apparate to the Ministry reception in the nude.
Regulus Black met
Bellatrix at
Madam Malkin’s.
Regulus said, “What is the meaning of life?”
Bellatrix said, “My cousin brought me.”
Regulus gave Bellatrix three issues of Witch Weekly.
Bellatrix gave Regulus a dirty look.
The next day it rained.
The consequence was: There was a big song and dance number involving chorus girls and all was resolved in perfect four-part harmony.
Aberforth Dumbledore met
Aberforth Dumbledore’s favourite goat at
The Three Broomsticks.
Aberforth said, “My sudoku won’t come out.”
The goat said, “I really don’t think you will manage.”
Aberforth gave the goat a riding crop.
The goat gave Aberforth a sensual massage.
The next day Aberforth said, “You’re my kind of person”. The goat said, “Nothing doing.”
The consequence was Hippogriffs for all (and free booze).
Viktor Krum met
Ron Weasley at
The turn-off to the M20 on a rainy Monday.
Viktor said, ‘How do you do that without three hands?’
Ron said, ‘I don’t see that’s any of your business.’
Viktor gave Ron a close shave.
Ron gave Viktor six pints of butterbeer with Firewhiskey chasers.
The next day the papers were full of their exploits.
The consequence was a new Minister for Magic and strict in-house discipline.
Xenophilius Lovegood met
Prof. Trelawney at
Zonko’s, beside the dungbombs.
Lovegood said, ‘Well, you could knock me down with a feather!’
Trelawney said, ‘You look wonderful when you say things like that.’
Lovegood gave Trelawney Ravenclaw’s diadem.
Trelawney gave Lovegood a black eye and a detention with Filch.
The next day they sold their story to the Quibbler.
The consequence was a couple of people with sports having a lot of fun.
Minerva McGonagall met
Justin Finch-Fletchley at
The Yule Ball.
Minerva said, “Bloody hell! That’s expensive!”
Justin said, “Why should I care what you think?”
Minerva gave Justin a suggestive wink.
Justin gave Minerva a slap on the arse.
The next day three feet of snow fell in the Home Counties.
In consequence, they all got married, had children named after their dead parents and generally perpetuated the heteronormative patriarchy.
And okay, this wasn't actually a game of Consequences. But when someone asks me if I've got a piece of paper and I have on in my hand - I'm going to say 'I have in my hand a piece of paper...'
This followed.
Adolf Hitler met
Neville Chamberlain in
1939.
Adolf said, ‘I promise to be a good fuhrer.’
Neville said, ‘You’d better be.’
Adolf gave Neville a folded piece of paper.
Neville gave Adolf a stern look.
The next day Neville went home and waved his piece of paper merrily.
The consequence was six years of war and the end of Neville (in a political sense) and the end of Adolf (in a mortal sense).
I had a fabulous week with some utterly fabulous people. I'm working on catching up with my flist (no internet for a week!). And yes, I'd do it all again. (In fact, the lack of internet led to 5000 words of High School Musical fic, but more on that later. I'm still a bit shell-shocked by it, tbh)
Anyway, we played some marvellous games of Consequences. For those unfamiliar with the game: each person has a piece of paper. They write the name of a character/person at the top and fold it over so the name is hidden. Then the papers are passed on to the next person. They then write another person's name, fold over and pass on. The game continues thus (in the version we played - HPsoccers, we have a new recipe):
[First person] met
[Second person] at
[Time/Place]
[First person said]
[Second person said]
[First person gave second person]
[Second person gave first person]
[The next day...]
[The consequence was...]
Then the papers are unrolled and read out, hopefully to much hilarity.
Got it? Good. Here are some of our better efforts.
Petunia met
Pansy Parkinson at
Noon.
Petunia said, “Let me give you a wheeze.”
Pansy said, “Only if you do it first.”
Petunia gave Pansy a lesson in washing-up, Muggle-style.
Pansy gave Petunia the rest of the bottle of Ogdens.
The next day they parted ways, satisfied.
The consequence was: they both had to apparate to the Ministry reception in the nude.
Regulus Black met
Bellatrix at
Madam Malkin’s.
Regulus said, “What is the meaning of life?”
Bellatrix said, “My cousin brought me.”
Regulus gave Bellatrix three issues of Witch Weekly.
Bellatrix gave Regulus a dirty look.
The next day it rained.
The consequence was: There was a big song and dance number involving chorus girls and all was resolved in perfect four-part harmony.
Aberforth Dumbledore met
Aberforth Dumbledore’s favourite goat at
The Three Broomsticks.
Aberforth said, “My sudoku won’t come out.”
The goat said, “I really don’t think you will manage.”
Aberforth gave the goat a riding crop.
The goat gave Aberforth a sensual massage.
The next day Aberforth said, “You’re my kind of person”. The goat said, “Nothing doing.”
The consequence was Hippogriffs for all (and free booze).
Viktor Krum met
Ron Weasley at
The turn-off to the M20 on a rainy Monday.
Viktor said, ‘How do you do that without three hands?’
Ron said, ‘I don’t see that’s any of your business.’
Viktor gave Ron a close shave.
Ron gave Viktor six pints of butterbeer with Firewhiskey chasers.
The next day the papers were full of their exploits.
The consequence was a new Minister for Magic and strict in-house discipline.
Xenophilius Lovegood met
Prof. Trelawney at
Zonko’s, beside the dungbombs.
Lovegood said, ‘Well, you could knock me down with a feather!’
Trelawney said, ‘You look wonderful when you say things like that.’
Lovegood gave Trelawney Ravenclaw’s diadem.
Trelawney gave Lovegood a black eye and a detention with Filch.
The next day they sold their story to the Quibbler.
The consequence was a couple of people with sports having a lot of fun.
Minerva McGonagall met
Justin Finch-Fletchley at
The Yule Ball.
Minerva said, “Bloody hell! That’s expensive!”
Justin said, “Why should I care what you think?”
Minerva gave Justin a suggestive wink.
Justin gave Minerva a slap on the arse.
The next day three feet of snow fell in the Home Counties.
In consequence, they all got married, had children named after their dead parents and generally perpetuated the heteronormative patriarchy.
And okay, this wasn't actually a game of Consequences. But when someone asks me if I've got a piece of paper and I have on in my hand - I'm going to say 'I have in my hand a piece of paper...'
This followed.
Adolf Hitler met
Neville Chamberlain in
1939.
Adolf said, ‘I promise to be a good fuhrer.’
Neville said, ‘You’d better be.’
Adolf gave Neville a folded piece of paper.
Neville gave Adolf a stern look.
The next day Neville went home and waved his piece of paper merrily.
The consequence was six years of war and the end of Neville (in a political sense) and the end of Adolf (in a mortal sense).