So if Harry Potter were written by Disney...

[skitty_kat]

... with full song and dance numbers, naturally.

James Potter (school hero, dull and nauseating) is Troy.
Thus Lily (pretty and fairly dull) is Gabriella.
Sirius (school heartthrob and jock) is Chad.
Peter gets to be bless-him-but-he's-stupid Jason.
So Remus has to have a secret baking habit as Zeke. Chocolate cookies, clearly.
No one could be as fabulous and bitchy as Lucius so he gets Sharpay (fab-u-lous!).
Which leaves Severus to look sharp in hats as Ryan. Drama queen.

Yeah, I'm going to hide now.