[Fic] Empathy

[adaliseranis]

This would be my - ah, let's see now... first post on this comm!! So hello, everyone, very nice to meet you all.
Here's a little what-if scribble I did; thought I'd share.

Title: Empathy

Author: Adali

Rating: PG [Mild swearing]

Characters: Shouko, Yashiro (Hints of Ren/Kyouko, Shou/Kyouko)

Notes: Takes place during the events of chapters 96/97.

Comments

[insulynde]

I think it would have been a lot more interesting if you didn't make Yashiro find out she was Shou's manager, though more for the amusing fact that Yashiro and Shouko could fall in love, and it'd be a vicious situation.. Plus, I think the last paragraph is unclear on how Yashiro knows that the girl Shouko spoke of is Kyoko... or are you saying something else? It's kind of hard to tell. XD;

But it's still very good, even if I was confused by the ending! ^^ I like how you've gotten all the characters down very well. ^__^

[adaliseranis]

I did think about keeping Yashiro in the dark, but this was intended to be more of a one-shot, going-no-where sort of fic. Just a sort of 'what if' (if that makes any sense... probably not... but anyway...)

It doesn't matter if Yashiro realized Shouko was talking about Kyouko (although I'd like to think he did). He can 'relate' because he, too, now has an unattainable woman (so you half got your wish... he knows who Shouko is, but he's also in love with her...)

Thank you very much for your review, especially the concrit about the last paragraph. You're absolutely right.

[insulynde]

Ohhh, I see, now.. XD; Yeah, this is why you need to keep things clear-so people like me can understand. XDXD

It's no prob! I like helping people with writing, even though I'm not very good at it myself. XD;;

[the_sweet]

I enjoyed it! Cute, without being overbearing in any way. I need to catch up on Skip Beat...

[adaliseranis]

Thanks, I'm glad you liked it.
I just caught up too... got hooked and read straight through for way longer than I care to admit. ^_^

[yokainomiko]

I quite enjoyed the story! It's cute and sometimes it's nice to read about the background characters' feelings of what's going on (if that makes any sense). I feel so sad knowing that there is almost no Skip Beat! fanfiction. I love your Yashiro and Ren avatar by the way >.>

[adaliseranis]

Thank you!
I agree, we need more Skip Beat fanfics. The characters and story are so wonderful, I'm suprised there aren't.

[anenko]

There's so little Skip Beat! fanfic that I would have been thrilled to find this story even if it wasn't so awesome--so it was a real treat to find a story that was well written and entertaining. I liked that the story was told from Yashiro's PoV; the poor man has so much to deal with, and it's adorable how much of a Ren/Kyoko 'shipper he is even in canon.

[adaliseranis]

I admit, I love Yashiro: he's like my fan-girl's voice in canon ^_^ Sadly, Ren doesn't listen to Yashiro anymore than he listens to me.
I'm glad you liked it!

[snigger02]

Very, very well-written. Having Yashiro as the lead is a bonus.