And I'll live without you. Love, but what good is one glove without the other?

[skinnyj]

I'm about to fall asleep in a home occupied by two humans and one cat, yet I feel more alone then I've felt in a long time. I've pushed so many people away lately with my stupid and selfish actions, I don't even want to be around myself anymore. I feel like I'm doing the right thing when I make a decision but I always seem to end up making the wrong choices. I regret almost everything I do anymore. Everyone tells me to pick something and stick with it. But what is one to do when everything they pick turns out to be the wrong thing and only makes them unhappy? What then? What do you do when you feel like your only with someone to make them happy, but then realize your just hurting them anyway. And as soon as you end that relationship you wish you hadn’t because you feel so empty inside. What do you do when you've pushed away someone whom you feel you had a genuine bond forming with, and now that bond is weakened if not broken but your actions. There is an easy way out of all this, well maybe two, yet each one seems just as bad as the other.

One would take someone from me forever, and the other would take me from this world forever. I don't know if I have the courage to try either. Say what you will about courage and killing yourself. I think taking your own life takes a pretty big amount of courage. Fuck I don't even know why I'm typing anymore. Goodnight.