DC BigBang fic: It's a (new) Winchester's life (1/6)

[skiing_pelican]

Chapter 1



Title: It's a (new) Winchesters life

Author: skiing_pelican

Artist: rayneshine

Fandom/Genre: Supernatural/post season 5 AU/humor, family, domestic, drama, baby!fic,

Pairing(s): Dean/Cas, Sam/Gabriel

Rating: NC17

Word Count: ~43 000

Warnings: turned-into-a-girl-Dean, Girl!Dean/Cas; Sam/Gabriel; (little bit) Angst; explicit het and slash (both Dean/Cas); violence; established relationship, language; fluff, fluff and more fluff
[Spoiler (click to open)]eventually Cairestiel; don't worry about underage issues, nothing inappropriate happens while Cas is in Claire's body)
Beta: oomnydevvotchka

Summary:

We all know Dean really wants to have a family. When Gabriel finds out, he gives him the possibility to have one. While Dean deals with the weirdness of her crazy situation, her girly body, her absolutely not-girlieness, tremendous amount of girly sex, later a huge potbelly and an annoying teasing brother, Dean has to put up with Gabriel's trickster demeanor too.

And if that wasn't enough, heaven has plans with Dean. Again.

Set approx. two years after a slightly AU finale of season 5 where Michael surprisingly decided to side with the Winchesters. AU from there on. Anna was revived. Dean/Cas established relationship with explicit scenes, Sam/Gabriel side pairing. Featuring lots of other Supernatural characters. Mostly fluffety fluff, schmoop and dripping sappyness, but with some seriously angsty bits in the later half. Baby!fic, no M!Preg.

Author's notes:

This fic is pure self-indulgence. I wanted a happy alternative to season six. I wanted to develop a verse that organically follows season 5, with an unique plot. I wanted to write a believable fem!Dean who is really still the Dean we know. I wanted to give them the chance to be happy and have a family without m!preg and without a totally ooc fem!Dean or fem!Cas. I wanted to give them time to develop, heal, and outgrow their issues. I wanted to incorporate all what I love about Destiel and Supernatural. Actually, this fic is only a snippet of all that I have planned - I grew fond of this verse, and it's probably not the last fic, as it only scratches the big main plot I have in mind. I hope I pull off all that I mentioned before, so please tell me what you think! Only with feedback I'm able to develop as writer ;)

I know reading Dean about Dean as “she” might set off some readers. Believe me, it was weird for me too at first. But I have my reasons for it, so please don't turn the fic down because of it, give it a chance. As my beta pointedly said, it's probably not supposed to feel comfortable.

And last but not least, huge thanks to my beta and my wonderful Artist for the really cute art! Please, visit her Artpost and tell her how great she is! Also, a big thank you to the DC BigBang community for hosting this challenge! I'm exited to be a part of it and can't wait to read all the fic and look at all the art! THANK YOU!

Fic link: Fic Masterlist

Art link: Art Masterlist

Chapter 1

When the world goes down, you look into her eyes and see what wouldn't be possible,
then you will understand about change.
Change is our fate.

Michael, Stull Cemetery, 2010

Dean relaxed on the hood of the Impala in Bobby's junkyard, thoughtfully looking up at the stars. He sipped on a beer, and although the night was calm and peaceful, his face was worried. The only disturbance was the shift in the air when Castiel appeared next to him.

"Is everything alright?" the angel asked.

Dean took another sip from his beer, still looking up at the stars. "Yeah. I was just thinking... With Michael sobering up and the apocalypse averted... With you and Gabe here, Bobby pushing us to find our own house... it seems like it's all over now."

Castiel sat down next to him silently.

"I can't believe it, though."

Castiel searched Dean's eyes. In Dean's short life, he had never had a break. He had never known peace like Castiel had.

"Good things do happen, Dean." Castiel stated solemnly.

Dean turned to glance at Cas. He still couldn't believe it, even if the proof was right in front of his nose. Yes, good things could happen, like Cas happened to him. But he still couldn't believe it was over. The other shoe would always drop. It was just a matter of time.

"Do you wish to settle down?" Castiel asked.

"I don't think I ever can." Dean answered, taking another sip from his beer. "There are still enough sons of bitches out there."

"But do you wish to, Dean?"

Dean thought for a moment. "Settling down... into an apple-pie life in an apple-pie house, like Ben and Lisa's. I don't know."

He sighed deeply. Something seemed to be wrong about it.

Castiel folded his hands. "I know you wish to have a family, Dean. I am sorry my vessel cannot provide you with one."

Dean stared at Cas in surprise. "I didn't even think about that!"

"My apologies if I assumed wrong."

"No, you didn't!" Dean suddenly admitted and grabbed Cas arm. His mouth went on auto-pilot, words falling out that he never intended to say out loud.

"It's just, I never thought about that. But a family with you would be pretty awesome..."

Cas smiled at him. Dean let go of Cas' arm. He didn't know what had made him say that. It was the truth, but thinking about it hurt in his chest. A family... that's what he really dreamed of. That's what would be missing in the apple-pie life in the apple-pie house. He wanted a family with Cas, but that simply wasn't possible. First, Cas was a man. Or at least, his vessel was a man. And second, he was an angel. He didn't even know if angels could have babies, let alone if it really would be Cas' baby and not Jimmy's. And on top of it all, he wouldn't want a baby to suffer in the insanity that was his life. Damn this chick-flick-moment that brought up unknown wishes.

"Fuck." he muttered and slipped from the car. He needed harder stuff to drown these thoughts. He couldn't have it anyway.

"Dean?" Cas asked, worried, but the hunter stomped to the house, ignoring him.

Dean sat down in Bobby's study and grabbed a bottle of liquor. Cas followed him, but stopped at the door frame. He didn't understand what happened to make Dean angry.

"Dean, did I do something wrong?" Cas asked. He tilted his head to the side in concern, an insecure frown wrinkling his forehead.

Dean set the liquor down after pouring himself a shot. He smiled up at Cas, but the smile didn't reach his eyes. "No Cas, everything's all right," he said and downed the shot. "You should probably go and find out what Sam or Bobby are doing."

Cas said nothing, only fixed Dean with one of his stares. Gabriel appeared next to him and poked him in the ribs. Cas didn't flinch in the slightest.

"Stop doing that, Gabriel." he scolded with his ever deep voice, not even looking at Gabriel. Gabriel just smirked at him, crossed his arms and looked at Dean.

"So... what's this about, huh?" he asked. "Let me guess, Dean is a stubborn mule and won't tell you what's bugging him."

"He won't." Cas said, "We were in the junkyard, speaking about..."

"That is none of your business, Gabe!" Dean interrupted, growling angrily at the archangel. "Why do you keep talking to him anyway?" he complained at Cas.

Castiel frowned, even more concerned. Gabriel rolled his eyes.

"Cassie is my favorite baby brother, genius! I know he acts like he doesn't know a single being in creation, but damn, we shared things ages before you and Sam were born. Literally!"

Dean still glowered at Gabe and downed another shot.

"So, what were you talking about, Cassie?" Gabe asked again. He still had his arms crossed, pretending he didn't really care, as always, but Cas knew Gabe was there for him.

"I was apologizing that my vessel cannot provide a family." Cas said quietly. Thanks to his deep voice, the words carried enough to reached Dean. Dean downed another shot, angrily slamming the glass on the table, jaw set in frustration.

"That so?" Gabriel asked with his trademark smirk. He clicked his fingers. "Well... I shouldn't mess with you, since your vessel is connected with your grace and everything, but if Dean wants a family..."

Castiel slowly turned his head to face Dean. Dean was staring back at them, the glass in her hand half way frozen on the way to her lips.

"Dean?" Castiel asked with a tilt of his head as he went over to Dean.

"Oh, my, you all don't need to thank me so much!" Gabriel exclaimed, his grin spanning from one ear to the other. "Well, I'll leave you two to it. You've got a baby to make, after all!"

"What's that talkin' 'bout a baby?" a grumpy voice sounded from the kitchen.

"Huh?" Sam's voice could also be heard. A moment later, the other two hunters stood in the door frame, next to a smirking Gabriel and stared. Sam rubbed his eyes and opened them again, only to find that the sight hadn't changed.

Dean was still sitting at Bobby's desk, the glass in her hand forgotten, staring at Cas because she was too afraid to look at herself.

"Now look what we have here." Bobby commented. "Ain't there anythin' tha' angel of yours can't do, Sam?"

"Is that really Dean?" Sam asked slowly. "I mean, he...she sure looks like him, but..."

Gabriel rolled his eyes. "He's still your brother- oh, sorry, I mean she is still your sister, you should be able to recognize her!" He took another look at Dean before he added with a suggestive wiggle of eyebrows "A hot sister!"

"Dude, that's my brother you're talking about!" Sam complained, bitch-facing Gabriel.

Dean finally had the strength to look down. Boobs! She slowly raised her hands and grabbed her own boobs incredulously. Her expression varied from confused to horrified to amazed and back. Slowly, the wheels in her head turned, trying to grasp what happened.

"Sam, I have boobs!" she suddenly blurted out with a maniacal look on her face. Then she noticed the sound of her voice. Her throat was suddenly dry. Terrified, Dean didn't dare to speak again.

"Oh my god..." Sam muttered frowning, but smiled.

Bobby rubbed his forehead in exasperation. "Well Dean, you're a girl now, that's what comes with the package. You ain't got a dick anymore..."

"I guess?" he added, looking at Gabriel for reassurance.

Gabriel made a playful huffy face. "Hey, when I screw with people I do it right!"

Dean's eyes went wide as moons as she stared down at her pants. She was slowly, but surely freaking out. Her jeans were too big now, hanging down loosely from her legs. Dean reached down with one hand and found something was missing. A horrified expression took over her face.

"Dean." Castiel tried to regain her attention.

Gabriel sensed what his brother was up to and pushed the others out of the room. "I think Cassie and Deanna have some talking to do."

"So, that idjit really wants to be a mom?" Bobby asked in the hallway after the door closed behind them. Sam mirrored his puzzled expression.

"I don't know." Gabriel shrugged. "I kinda tossed them into the cold water with this. But that's the best chance they get for having a family, right?"

Sam's eyes got all feely. "That could be the best thing you've ever done for us, Gabe!"

"Oh boy." Bobby muttered and hurried out of ear range before the boy could embarrass himself even more.

"Oh, no biggie." Gabe said, dismissing it with a wave of his hand. Sam gathered him and pulled him up to a kiss, and with a snap of fingers, they were in their upstairs room.

* * *

"Dean, this could be your chance for a family." Cas said softly, patiently searching Dean's eyes. "Our chance for a family."

"Right... It's just... weird. Even by our standards." Dean's hands were on her boobs again. She still couldn't believe they were there. This was all so screwed.

"Cas, I don't know... I... I have to think about it... I don't know what to think about it, I don't know if I could even pull it off."

Dean hesitated. The sound of her voice was familiar. It still had that rough edge, but it was much higher than she was used to. It sounded a little like the abused voice of a jazz singer who smoked too much. It also reminded her faintly of the voice she used to have as a boy.

Castiel took her hand and dropped down to his knees in front of her to be closer. "Take your time, Dean. However you decide, I will respect your decision and help you in any way possible."

Dean looked down at her angel.

"You've never said if you want a family." she probed hesitantly.

Castiel smiled. "I do want it, Dean, very much. I have rebelled and I have fallen for you." His voice dropped even deeper as he continued. "And I have always marveled at the gift my father granted your kind. The gift to create life. I never even dared to dream I would get this chance."

Castiel's words went straight to Dean's heart. She fought back the tears that were forming in her eyes. So many emotions were swirling in her head, making her stomach knot, tearing her apart on the inside. But she was still unable to admit or express the depth of what she was feeling for Cas. With all that burning inside her, barely held together, she only looked down at Cas, staring into his eyes for a ridiculous amout of time.

"Cas..." Dean finally managed, her voice almost breaking. "Would it even be yours? This isn't your real body, after all."

"It will." Cas answered solemnly. "The body will be created of Jimmy's DNA, but what matters is the soul. Jimmy's soul has long left this body. The child's soul will be a product of my grace and your soul."

"How can you be so sure?" Dean asked.

"I can't." Cas answered hesitantly. "There are rumors that there were Nephilim before, but we don't know for sure."

Dean frowned, considering this information. The situation, fuck, her whole life was fucked up enough as it was. And who knew what kind of baby they would have, if not even Cas could tell?

"Gabriel will help us should any problems arise." Castiel added.

Dean sighed. "Cas I..."

"Dean. You should rest. This is a serious decision; you should take your time to consider it. I will respect whatever decision you make."

"Okay." Dean smiled. She leaned down to kiss her angel. He was so perfect and understanding right now. The love she felt for him seemed ridiculous to her and she felt like a teenager with her first crush. With the only difference being that this was much deeper. But she didn't say a word about it.

"Hey," she suddenly blurted "do you still like me?"

"I don't understand." Castiel tilted his head confused.

"Oh well, I was a dude before, now I'm a girl. Doesn't that weird you out? Do you even like girls?"

Castiel smiled. "You are still attractive. Gender has no real meaning to me."

"It weirds me out for sure."

The theoretical talk about angel babies and Cas' pure sweetness had taken Dean's thoughts off the fact that she was a girl for the time being. She had not yet dared to think about what would be necessary to make a baby. Only thinking about it made her freak out. She jumped when Cas laid a hand on her thigh, close to the spot where something that should be there was not there. Dean already missed her dick incredibly.

'I can't fuck him anymore!' suddenly occurred to her. She stared down at her boyfriend, eyes widened in terror. The wheels in her brain turned on mercilessly, delivering the next terrifying fact. She had a vagina.

Dean Winchester, manliest man on the whole planet, had his dick replaced with a vagina.

"I hate Gabriel!" Dean bolted, jumped up and rushed up to the bathroom adjoining her and Cas' room. Even moving with this body felt different - she almost tripped over the stairs. Cas followed, surprised by her sudden mood swing.

Dean locked the door behind her and stripped completely. She stared at her form in the bathroom mirror. She didn't recognize it as her body at all. It was all wrong, and weird, and there were no words to describe how uncomfortable she felt in it.

Awkwardly, she touched the unfamiliar curves of her body with the slender tips of her fingers. The skin was smooth, almost hairless and deliciously soft. The most curious thing was that all her freckles were in exactly the right spots on the wrong body. Somehow, feeling the touches on her skin helped her grasp that this was now her body. But it still felt wrong. Her fingers trailed down, stroking the smooth skin lightly where her happy trail had been, and further down... Her breath hitched and her body shuddered as she touched a sensitive spot. It felt so wrong. It felt so awkward, wrong but good at the same time. A weird pull spread through the lower part of her body, a strange sensation she couldn't quite place. Her brain swirled. This was too much for her. She retrieved her fingers in shock, and stared at her flushed face in the mirror. She didn't recognize it as her face. The same mossy green eyes stared back at her through thick lashes, but from a face that belonged to someone else. She felt like she was looking at a stranger instead of a reflection. She pulled back, grabbed her boxers and T-shirt and rushed to slip them on.

As she finally went out of the bathroom, Cas was standing there, waiting for her.

"Let's just hit the hay." Dean suggested and rushed to the bed. She didn't want to think about this mess anymore.

Castiel lay down next to her and spooned up, wrapping an arm around her slim waist and placing a soft kiss on her neck. His touch was comforting, but Dean couldn't really calm down. Dean tried to ignore how Cas' arm draped around her waist felt so different. She was even tempted to remove his arm, something she would normally never do, but she knew the weird feeling wouldn't disappear. Exhausted by the long day, Dean slipped into sleep much faster that she had expected.

* * *

Dean woke up early. The familiar weight of Cas' arm lay on her belly. She smiled in his direction as she slowly opened her eyes. He was awake, watching her sleep, as always. Dean had long ago stopped wondering if the angel had nothing better to do than to watch her the whole night. It had been weird at first, but Dean felt protected. She didn't have any nightmares when Cas was with her. She would never admit that she enjoyed it now and didn't like sleeping without her stalker angel watching over her anymore.

"Good morning, Dean." He smiled at her and leaned over to place a soft kiss on her lips.

"G'mornin' Cas." she muttered sleepily. Abruptly, she was wide awake and jolted up. The weirdness of her own voice reminded her of what had happened the other day. She swung her legs out of the bed and rushed straight into the bathroom. She splashed cold water in her face and looked into the mirror. Her face looked a tiny bit more familiar than the night before. She sighed deeply, taking a moment to breathe and concentrate. The sleep had helped her calm down. The second look in the mirror, curiously, didn't freak her out as much as before. She was now more on the level of simply accepting the weirdness. That didn't mean she had to like it, but she could look at herself more calmly. Dean once again stared at her features, analyzing them in a scientific, detached way. Actually, she looked good, she concluded. Very good. To tell the truth, she looked like the damn hottest chick in town!

Suddenly, it clicked in Dean's head and she realized that this was her body now. She was no longer looking at a stranger, she was looking at herself. It was still feeling all kinds of weird, but the first step was taken. Slowly, a smile spread on her face. The girl in the mirror smiled back, and it looked so much like Dean's trademark smirk that her grin even grew.

* * *

Sam yawned and rubbed his sleepy eyes as he stumbled down into the kitchen. He found a short haired girl standing in front of the coffee pot. In an instant, adrenaline pumped through his system and he grabbed one of the shotguns that where hidden everywhere in Bobby's house.

"Who are you and what are you doing in here!" he yelled at the girl, pointing the shotgun at her head. The woman nearly dropped the coffee pot and jolted around.

"Dude, it's me! Dean! Gabriel screwed with me last night, remember?"

Sam groaned and put the shotgun back. "Sorry. It's too early."

The woman smirked in a perfect Dean way and offered him a cup of coffee. Sam gave his brother-sister-whatever a once over and chuckled awkwardly. It seemed wrong to see the body of a girl dressed like this if she wasn't his girlfriend. Dean's boxers hung loosely on her hips, the otherwise too large t-shirt was tight at her boobs, and her limbs were slender, less hairy and... girly.

"I think you need new stuff." he said, and concentrated on his coffee to avoid staring at his brother too closely.

"I think I need a bra..." Dean murmured, with a mixed expression on her face.

Sam nearly choked on his coffee.

"Never mind." Dean said. She was so not telling her brother about all the weird girly things she would need now.

"So," Sam said, setting down his coffee. "Do you know what to do now? Are Cas and you...you know... trying it?" Sam stumbled over the words. The thought of what Cas and Dean would have to do was... gross. But Sam wanted to know anyway.

"No, I've got no idea how to deal with this shit!" Dean exclaimed angrily. "Hell, I don't even know if I want a family, with all this shit we're dealing with every day! The poor kid could get all kinds of screwed!"

"Calm down, ya idjit!" Bobby grumbled from the door. He stomped into the kitchen and took a cup of coffee.

"I'll tell ya somethin' kid, if ya like it or not: First, nobody is forcing anythin' on ya. Second, it's calm right now. You could get out. Hell, I've never seen anyone with better chances before! Most hunters don't even get one! An' besides, the damn daddy of the kid will be an angel! If anyone can keep your family safe, it's Cas, an' you know it. So I'll tell you what ya gonna do, ya gonna get fuckin' knocked up and get yourself a family! I want to have grandchildren, for christ's sake! I'm sure ya can handle nine months as a woman!"

At the end of his speech, he patted Dean's shoulder. "An' don't ya dare fuck this up, boy, 'cause you an' Cas, that's as happy as I've seen any hunter get. We all know you're head over heels for that boy."

Dean and Sam were both stunned into silence. Bobby was right and they knew it. Of course Sam and Bobby noticed how much Dean really cared for Cas. She was still reserved when it came to admitting feelings or touching in public, but Sam and Bobby knew her well enough to know she was totally whipped. All three knew Bobby meant much more when he said "head over heels".

Dean finally cleared her throat. "Okay... you finished, Bobby?"

"Yeah. Just think about it." Bobby said seriously, pointing a warning finger at her.

Sam grinned. To him, it was only a matter of time until Dean would give in. The only obstacle was that Dean would really have to spend almost a year as a girl.

"Hey, why don't we ask Gabriel to let your hair grow?" Sam teased, "You look kind of weird with the old Dean-style!"

Dean glared at him.

"Hey, that's a good idea!" Gabriel exclaimed cheerfully, strolling into the kitchen. He clicked his fingers, and Dean had long, brown hair falling down on her shoulders.

"You're so going to regret that." Dean grumbled, sending a death glare in Gabriel's direction.

* * *

Dean groaned. They had arrived at the local shopping mall. Bobby had lent her some of his wife's old stuff for the trip, but she didn't like wearing dead people's clothes. She needed some new ones, and thus the trip to the shopping mall was a necessary evil.

"Hey, while we're at it, we should grab some clothes for wanna-be-moms!" Sam teased.

This was going to be a long shopping trip.

"First, undies." Dean decided.

Sam looked at her, a goofy grin barely suppressed on his features. "Do you even know what size you have?"

"32 C." Dean knew instantly.

Sam frowned. "How can you be so sure?"

"Well," Dean grinned and grabbed her boobs again, "call it my specialty."

Sam rolled his eyes.

"Sorry, no Sams and Gabes permitted." Dean grinned. "Besides, it would be weird if I had three dudes looking over my shoulder while I chose hot stuff."

"What would be wrong with it?" Castiel asked quite oblivious.

Gabriel laughed out loud and patted his brother's shoulder. "Because people would think we all fuck Dean!"

"Shout it out louder, not everyone in the fucking parking lot heard it!" Sam snapped. He was horrified by the mental picture.

"I see." Castiel responded calmly. "May I join Dean, or would that be weird too?"

Dean grabbed his tie. "You are required to join me!" she grinned and dragged him along.

Her body still felt all kinds of weird, but it would be a shame not to wear steaming hot undies on a steaming hot body, now, wouldn't it?

"Oh, and call me Deanna when we're in public, ok?"

* * *

The woman in the lingerie boutique was quite amused by the pile gathered in the arms of the resolute woman in her store. She shoved a collection of bras in the arms of her quiet boyfriend. It seemed as if she was in for some major restocking. Her boyfriend looked at the bras as if he did not know what purpose they served. 'Maybe he's her brother and still a virgin...' the clerk pondered. But she was smiling nice and helpful and didn't react in any way to the weirdness of the couple.

Dean had way too much fun in the boutique. She was grinning like mad as she looked at the lace, silk and satin and imagined it on a hot chick. It was weird, though, that she would be the hot chick wearing them. But at the same time, she was really excited. And the best part was yet to come. She finally took everything out of Cas' arms and disappeared into a changing room. After a short moment, she moved the curtain aside so that Cas could look at her.

"How's that?" she asked, grinning suggestively. She tried to stand in what she thought would be a seductive pose, but didn't quite pull it off. But no matter how feeble her attempts were, the sight of her curvy body covered in suggestive lingerie with just the right amount of coverage made Cas' blue eyes go wide in awe.

"I like that." Cas deadpanned.



Dean chuckled. This was as good as she expected. She disappeared behind the curtain and tried other things.

'Obviously not her brother.' the sales clerk pondered, 'This girl is not shy at all. Well, I probably wouldn't be if I had her hips...'

Dean finally emerged from the shop with a large shopping bag in her hands. She grinned broadly and Cas trailed behind her with a slight blush on his cheeks. Gabriel grinned.

"Dean-o, what are you doing with my bro? Public sex? You're corrupting him!"

"We..." Cas paused, "did not engage in coitus... here." His ears were slowly turning a dark shade of red.

"Yeah, yeah, I don't believe you!" Gabriel exclaimed, laughing, knowing very well his brother had not lied. "But you should learn how to talk! It's called fucking!"

Castiel glared at him. Sam gaped, staring at his boyfriend in shock. Dean was only slightly annoyed. A random grandmother covered the ears of a little girl with her hands. And Gabriel was enjoying their reactions. "Oh, come on, she'll fuck when she is older!" he said to the Grandmother. "And I really hope you've had a lot of fucking, or I would be very sorry for you!"

"Gabriel, that's enough." Sam said, with the most serious bitch-face he could manage.

"Hey, I'm only talking about the most normal thing in the world here!" Gabriel complained, still smirking.

"Yeah, whatever." Dean grumbled, "Let's get this over with."

The rest of the shopping trip was boring Dean out of her skull. Sam and Gabe's constant teasing and Cas' obliviousness about friggin' everything in the store were tearing on her nerves.

"Hey, why don't you try this one?" Sam asked, chuckling, holding up a shiny pink mini skirt with ruffles.

"Hey, I might be in a different body, but I'm still a dude up here!" Dean complained, pointing at her head. "And there is no fucking way I'm wearing a skirt!"

"Why not?" Gabriel chimed in. "They are quite comfy."

Everyone except Castiel stared at him in shock. "How the fuck do you know?" Dean demanded.

"You think I was in this vessel all the time? Yeah, I've been wearing him a long time now, but I had a girl vessel once." he explained.

"Huh." Dean said.

"Is he still in there?" Sam asked, concerned.

"Hell no. Dead for centuries."

Sam was clearly relieved.

When Sam and Gabriel were not looking, Dean hid a skirt in the pile anyway. Just out of pure curiosity. But of course, not the awful pink one. It was a short hot black one.

* * *

The shopping trip went on, as they had to get a lot of new stuff for Dean. Gabriel came up time after time with new things that Dean and Sam wouldn't even have thought about. And explained some of them in much more detail than any of the brothers ever cared to know. At some point or the other, Dean needed to relieve herself. She went right into the restroom, not taking a second thought about it.

"Hi Sam" she said as she passed him without looking, heading for the booths.

"Uhm, De...anna?" Sam asked. "Don't you think you're wrong here?"

Dean stopped and turned to look around. All the guys were staring at her, and some hurried to close their pants.

"Sorry." she muttered and hurried out of the bathroom, blushing and embarrassed. Sam only shook his head and grinned.

Dean stopped in front of the door that parted the mystery that was the woman restrooms from the rest of the mall. It felt wrong to go in there. She still was a dude after all. Hesitantly, she opened the door and stepped inside. Two girls where standing in front of a large mirror and chatting, while one of them applied some lipstick.

"And you won't believe what he said!"

"What?"

"He said: I have to show you my cool new car. And he wiggled his eyebrows in this, I want to have sex with you! way. I mean seriously, he's absolutely not getting in my pants because he has an old-timer!"

"Men are so stupid! Only thinking with their dicks!"

"Yeah. And he was so proud of this Impala or what's it called."

Dean felt kicked in her guts. She quickly passed the two girls to get her business done. Which was a whole new kind of weird, but some part of her brain just accepted that everything was different now and she just dealt with it without freaking out. Or without freaking out too much.

Sam was waiting and talking to Castiel when she got out again. The moment Dean stepped out, a stupid grin was directed in her direction. Sam was enjoying all this way too much. Figures the bitch would take immense pleasure in playing dress-up with Dean as his personal doll. She reached out angrily to slap Sam hard, to wipe that stupid grin off his face, but her arm was shorter than she was used to, and only the tips of her fingers brushed lightly over Sam's shoulder. Sam broke into a fit of barking laughter.

"Dude, you just bitch-slapped me!" he exclaimed, laughing so hard that tears were welling up in his eyes. Cas just looked from Sam to Dean and back, the humor of the situation completely lost on him.

"Shut up, Bitch!" Dean barked and stepped nearer to punch Sam on the shoulder. She hit him hard this time, but Sam still couldn't hold back his laughter and just rubbed the sore spot with his hand.

"I'm not the one dealing out bitch-slaps!" Sam insisted, nearly doubling over with laughter.

She huffed, ignored Sam and went on. She was never going to live this down. And she really wanted this shopping trip to get over with.

* * *

It was already getting dark when they were finally finished and arrived back at Bobby's. Dean went up with her new stuff to change immediately. She really didn't feel good about wearing the stuff of a dead woman. When she was finished and looked at herself in the mirror, she was slightly more at ease with the weirdness that was her body. She wore a simple black T-shirt (they couldn't find any with band prints in the mall), a long sleeved button-down shirt and some fitting, but not too tight jeans. She sighed. At least her eyes were the same. Her face was also still familiar. The constant beard stubble was gone and her features appeared finer, but it was still the same face. Even if it looked girly.

'Can I really pull this off? Be a mom?' she asked herself. 'Can I raise a kid and protect it from all the fuckers out there? Can I keep my kid from being screwed up by our life?'

Bobby was right, this was her chance to have a family. She pulled her shirt up to look at her boobs again. It was gonna take steaming hot girl sex to be a mom in the first place. She was curious, to say the least. It' was gonna be weird, but Dean was suddenly feeling adventurous.

She locked the door to her room, stripped down to her undies, lay down on her bed and prayed. "Cas?"

It didn't need more. The angel was instantly standing next to her bed. His eyes went wide again as he took in her delicate figure, only covered with a bit of lace. Dean grinned and reached up to him. Cas didn't need more invitation to sit down next to her and to lean over her to capture her lips. That part didn't feel much different, Dean pondered, sinking into the kiss.

'Oh, that does feel different' she wondered, when Cas slung his arm around her slim waist and pressed her close. As if her waist was made for an arm to drape around it. Her body arched automatically as Cas pressed her close.

Cas looked deeply into her green eyes. "Are you sure you want it?"

"Yeah, of course. Man, how many dudes can try this?"

Cas rested a hand on her belly. "You want to conceive?"

"Oh...uh. No, not yet. I haven't figured it all out just yet."

Cas backed away reluctantly.

"Hey, where you think you're going?" Dean complained.

"Until you want to conceive, or until you are a man again, we should not..."

"Don't say engage in coitus." Dean chuckled.

"...fuck." Castiel closed pointedly, smirking slightly.

Dean smiled and shook her head. Nobody had explained that to him yet?

"There is something called protection, Cas. It will keep me from getting pregnant and we can still fuck."

A smile spread on Cas face, and he moved back closer to her again.

"I have never done it with a woman." he admitted.

"I know. That's something we have to take care of, don't we?" Dean grinned mischievously. "We'll figure it out."

Cas' arm wrapped around her waist again and he gently kissed her neck. Dean felt him fumbling with the fastener of her bra. She moved her hands to help him, but her fingers were more in his way than a help. She knew just perfectly how to flip a bra open on some random chick, but she hadn't gotten the hang of it for herself just yet. She laughed a bit when they finally managed to get the damn thing off. It took them nearly as long as it had taken Dean to get it on, which was way too long.

"You're wearing too many damn layers." Dean complained. Cas captured her lips for another heated kiss, she felt the air shift around them and bare skin was pressing against her. Normally, she didn't like it when Cas just mojoed them off, but right now they were both too impatient to fumble with too many buttons, so it was okay. Cas was slowly, but surely developing a sense for when he was allowed to go the faster way.

"That's better." She grinned when Castiel released her again. She still thought it was a crime to wear so many damn layers if you had such a delicate, lithe body beneath it.

Cas pulled back to look at her exposed breasts. Dean's breath hitched as he covered a breast with his hand. Wow, they were sensitive! Keeping his hand on her breast, he leaned forward again to nip the skin of her collarbone.

"You smell different," Cas muttered and placed another kiss, "taste different too."

"Different, but good." He added, with his deep, husky bedroom voice. Dean could get hard from that voice alone. Except, she couldn't technically get hard anymore, but she felt her body react. She was feeling all tingly between her legs and...wet. It was all kinds of weird, to say the least.

Cas moved gently, exploring her new body with awe. Dean was thankful for it, and happily let Cas take the lead for now. Cas carefully watched her as he began to massage her breast. With each time he touched her, a tingle raced through her body. Each touch felt so different, but yet so familiar at the same time. It was now that she didn't only realize that this was her body, but also accepted it. And she wanted this body, her body, to be touched.

Dean kissed him. "You know, I'm still not out of sugar, babe." Dean teased. Her body was aching for more, she wanted to feel more of Cas, to feel him everywhere. She took one of Cas hands and guided it down between her legs and moaned loudly when Cas touched her pleasure spot. She had no idea what to expect.

Cas removed his hand, but only long enough to get rid of the last bit of clothing that was still in their way. Dean's panty went flying through the room. Cas' hand was back again immediately, and he went on by instinct, watching Dean's reactions to see what she liked. Cas kissed his way down over her breasts and further down, lingering a moment at her belly button before he reached the spot where his hands already worked dirty moans out of Dean. Dean gasped when she suddenly felt a hot tongue intrude between her legs. Dean was soon squirming under Cas' attention and moaning loud, finally crying out Cas' name as she came, her whole body trembling.

"Oh my god Cas..." Dean gasped, panting heavily. Cas pulled up to her and gathered her in his arms.

"No, I'm still just an angel." Cas huffed, annoyed.

"Sorry." Dean grinned. She felt his length press hard against her leg. Any other man would be touching himself now. But Cas, the saint, didn't.

She reached down to stroke his length and bent over to kiss Cas. He tasted odd, different, and it took her a moment to realize that was her new taste. She had no idea how long she would need to recover, now that she was a girl, but she wouldn't let him get away without a treat.

"I love you." Cas said, gazing deeply into her eyes with his brilliant blue ones. Her heart swelled and she nearly forgot to continue stroking him. In moments like this, she wondered what she had done to deserve this. Her own guardian angel lover. He would always be there, and if he ever died, she could still pester at Gabriel to pester at Michael to bring him back. If Gabriel wasn't able to bring him back all by himself.

"I love you too." She whispered quietly into his ear and pulled back to look into his eyes. The three little words seemed too small for all that she was really feeling. A flock of little butterflies seemed to be making wild dances in her belly, screwing around in it. She lost herself in his eyes again, as it always happened so easily. It dawned on her in that moment that Cas would truly be there for her forever, and for a child. He would do everything in his power to protect the little one.

"You know what, fuck protection! Let's make a baby!" she exclaimed suddenly. Cas' eyes lit up with utter happiness, and Dean could see how much the angel himself wanted this. Cas grabbed her neck and pulled her into a loving, passionate kiss.

It didn't take her body any more time to recover. The kisses heated up fast, Cas' mouth and hands roaming demandingly over her body. She felt his cock twitch in her hand. Cas moaned, frustrated, when she let go of his cock and pulled back from him. He stared at her with lustful blown eyes, dark with intent and clearly disapproving her withdrawal.

But it was not Dean's intention to stop now. She pushed him back into the mattress and climbed on top of him. Straddling his hips with hers, she sat down slowly on his cock, carefully guiding the hard shaft into her. It felt so weird, but good at the same time. She could simply take all of him at once, no need for slow and gentle probing, no need for lube. She let out a satisfied moan and delved in the feeling of him in her slick new hole. Slowly and testing, she rolled her hips and tried rocking back and forth a bit, feeling him deep within her. Cas groaned in pleasure beneath her and it made her even more wet than she was already. She rocked forth and back, finding a rhythm to settle in.

Cas sat up, shifting their position so she ended up sitting in his lap, still filled with him. He groaned and captured her mouth for another heated kiss. His arms wrapped around her, grinding her more into him as she pushed down against him. Dean wrapped her arms around him, digging her hands into his ruffled dark hair. They were as so close to each other as they could possibly be. They rocked together, with their bodies pressed against each other, capturing each other's lips or biting down at the soft flesh of the neck, until Cas pressed her head into the crook of his neck. Dean caught a glimpse of light and immediately closed her eyes as Cas groaned out her name as he came inside her, rocking through it until Dean came also.

Panting heavily, they kept sitting entangled with each other. Cas was still in her and so close to her, with her boobs pressed against his chest. Dean's head rested against Cas' neck, and he was caressing the nape of her neck tenderly.

"Huh, I'm a chick now..." Dean suddenly said.

Castiel pulled back to look at her and tilted his head in confusion. "You have been for a day now."

"I know. But you know, I don't feel much different. My body is weird, but I'm still ticking the same way up here. I think."

"I do not really understand the difference." Cas admitted.

"I know. But Sam's still the bigger girl, even if I am the one with boobs!"

"Come down ya idjits, grub's ready!" Bobby's yell suddenly sounded through the house, completely scattering the tenderness of the moment.

The smell of fresh food caught Dean's attention. "We should get clean and down before they eat our share!"

They shared another tender kiss before they moved apart reluctantly.

Collecting her panty from the lamp it had landed on, Dean was slightly annoyed as she found Cas standing there with all those layers on again when she turned back.

"No." she said matter-of-factly and went over to strip Cas' upper half. He watched her, confused. "Wear this." she said, tossing one of her old male t-shirts at him. It was a little too big, but far better than the dress-shirt-suit-tie-trench coat combo. Even when she had to admit, the tie came in handy from time to time. She lingered a moment, looking at him.

"I'm as tall as you now." Dean realized. It was even easier to get lost in his eyes.

"We should get you some jeans the next time we go shopping." she finally shrugged, picked up her stuff and went for a quick shower.



* * *

Bobby had been cooking his famous chili. Even Gabriel waited impatiently. Being an angel, he didn't really need food, but his was still the biggest mouth to feed.

"Hey, I'm still growing!" he exclaimed at Sam's incredulous look at his enormous plate.

Sam rolled his eyes and concentrated on his own serving.

"You're such a big child." Bobby grumbled. "I always wondered," he continued, "how many of them legends about tricksters have grown on your pile of dirt? We all see your fondness for sweets, but you don't really need them, being an angel an' all."

"That will always remain a mystery." Gabriel said, and wiggled his eyebrows.

Sam groaned. "Gabe, honey... don't say that word."

"Which one?" Gabriel asked obliviously.

"Mystery. It reminds me of the mystery spot."

Gabriel's mouth formed a silent o of understanding.

"I still don't understand how you could forgive him for that one." Bobby grumbled and shrugged, "But hey, that's none of my business."

"Hey, I was trying to teach him a lesson! Good intentions an' all!"

"Oh yeah? It wasn't funny to see my brother dying over and over again!" Sam snapped.

"Well, it takes some harsh tricks to get something into that big, stubborn mule head of yours." Gabriel shrugged nonchalantly. "Believe me, I've seen it all. I've been around a long time. But no, we don't believe the trickster 'cause he's an evil monster."

Dean and Cas entered the room just that moment to find Sam staring, hurt, at Gabriel, Gabriel not noticing anything because he was concentrating on his plate and Bobby looking uncomfortable in his own house.

Bobby was somewhat glad to be distracted by Castiel's unusual appearance. He gave the angel a quick once over.

"Hmpf. Never thought he'd be such a slim boy under all those layers." he commented.

"Finally!" Gabriel exclaimed "What did you do to get him to change his stuff, Dean? Fuck him?"

"Actually, yes." Dean grinned and pulled the chili pan closer to her plate.

Sam stared at her, trying to wrap the giant computer, also called his brain, around his brother having girl-sex with his/her boyfriend. It didn't compute.

"I don't understand why my clothing is of any importance." Cas deadpanned.

"You should get him some jeans." Bobby suggested, ignoring everyone else on the table.

"Yeah, I know. You got some he can borrow? Mine are too big." Dean asked.

Bobby glanced at Castiel. "Hell no. Get him his own stuff. Besides, he looks more like Gabriel's size."

"I'm not giving him anything!" Gabriel chimed in.

"Why don't you mojo something?" Sam asked.

"Now, where would the fun in that be?" Gabriel asked and crossed his arms. "I'm not your happy mojo machine for every little shit you need!"

Castiel cleared his throat. The deep, rumbling sound got the attention of everyone in an instant.

"We have something more important to discuss." Castiel stated. He covered Dean's hand with his own in a gesture he had learned from her, even though Dean never used it in public. The small gesture was not lost on the others on the table, but they knew better than to comment on it. Dean looked as if she didn't know if she should withdraw her hand or not.

"Dean and I have..."

"Don't say: engaged in coitus." Gabriel laughed. "We've all noticed that. Can't you keep yourself together, Cassie? Always need to make the show with all the lights flickering and everything?"

"And you haven't stopped the lights from flickering." Sam snapped at his boyfriend.

"Why should I?" Gabriel asked.

Dean looked horrified. She hadn't known that anything happened besides Cas' grace peeking out. Now that she thought about it, it was quite obvious it had to.

"It's true, boy." Bobby muttered.

"That was not what I was going to say." Castiel grumbled, glaring at his brother. "I was going to say: Dean and I have reached a decision."

"Yeah!" Dean blurted out, "We are going to have a baby, guys!"

"That's great!" Sam grinned. Bobby smiled. Gabriel smirked knowingly. They didn't seem surprised at all, but nonetheless happy about the news.

"And there is still nobody thanking me for this!" Gabriel sighed in an offended fuss.

"Hey, I thanked you!" Sam snapped. Sometimes he had the feeling Gabriel didn't really notice him.

"Hm, okay, thank you Gabe." Dean admitted grumpily. "That's pretty awesome. But I'm not saying this twice, so remember it good."

"Thank you, brother." Cas deadpanned.

"See? Wasn't so bad now, was it?" Gabriel smirked self-satisfied.

Bobby suddenly took Dean's beer bottle away.

"Hey, I was still drinking that!" Dean complained.

"No, you ain't!" Bobby scolded. "If you're having a baby, you'd better stop drinking sooner than later or I'll hit ya idjit head so hard it flies!"

Dean glared at Bobby for a second, but didn't protest. Cas touched two fingers to her forehead and she felt a familiar wave of healing energy flowing through her body, clearing her of any remnants of her long history of alcohol abuse. She met his eyes but neither of them commented on it. Then she stared down at her empty plate. She was full already after only one serving. Everyone was finished with their chili now, and Gabriel clicked his fingers. Everything was cleaned up in an instant and a huge tower of sweets was standing in the middle of the table. Dean caught sight of an apple crumble pie and reached for it immediately. There was always room for some pie.

Chapter 2