(no subject)
I think my boredom with life is disappearing. Which is quite a good thing, the end of the school year had me pretty worried. I'm once again free as a bird, which brings back all sorts of feelings that I've had before. The amount of freedom actually bothers me a little, as sometimes I feel like I have nothing to accomplish. I'm trying desperately to land myself a job, because I'm in a load of financial shit right now (and no, it's not just the money I owe Brian ;) Not Vicklund sized financial shit, but it's enough to make me care.
I read something about being completely incomplete, and the more I think about it, the more I think I can relate. To me, it means a million different tiny fibers (insert bad South Park joke if you like) of my mind and all its cares have woven themselves together in this bizarre tapestry that I like; however, I'm having a harder time interpreting it than modern art. Quite frustrating, because I think it has some answers that I'd really like to hear, especially those regarding what I really want. The questions all involve the typical B.S. that comprises young adult male life. Girls, the future, friends, money, all the usual suspects are present with no surprises.
I'm thankful my urges to be irresponsible that I had last summer have died off. I will totally let loose and have some fun the summer, but the burning desire I had last summer to push the envelope labeled "dumb" is gone. Maybe that urge is something everyone gets right after high school, and needs to get out of their system. It's no big deal really and nothing terrible happens, but I'm glad I don't have it anymore.
Life's pretty good, just missing some things.
But if you study the logistics
And heuristics of the mystics
You will find that their minds rarely groove in a line
So it's much more realistic
To abandon such ballistics
And resign to be trapped on a leaf in a vine.