Hey
I've known for years that I'm gonna die by my own hand. And in the last few weeks I seem to be getting closer and closer to the inevitable event.
I spent a few days in hospital because of the Bi-Polar. Am in a damaging depressive episode. But I ended up discharging myself due to feeling so so alone! I bring my loneliness on myself due to my anxiety and paranoia but it doesn't stop it being lonely!
So now I'm going to day hospital ( Which is pretty cool! ) and seeing the Home Treatment Team most nights.
It's weird thinking that other people care for me when I've given up! Even if these people are bing paid for caring.
Leg's slow at healing but at my last appointment they think it's catching up to most peoples breaks. It's still got a clear broken line in both legs but now one of them has bone growing around it, like candy floss. I'm happy with that and on one crutch now.
Crazy, mad snow today! Feel sorry for the horses! And walking in the snow on a crutch does suck! We stopped at Sainsburys on the way hoe and I bought a 'Sylar Spock' figure for £2.50 :-] I like things like that. Small pleasures hep delay the obvious.
On the subject of good things, my brother bought me a 'Frankie Boyle' ticket for christmas. Next october. Now I've just got to get through the next few months. Blueagh! Sometimes it feels painful to breath!
I spent a few days in hospital because of the Bi-Polar. Am in a damaging depressive episode. But I ended up discharging myself due to feeling so so alone! I bring my loneliness on myself due to my anxiety and paranoia but it doesn't stop it being lonely!
So now I'm going to day hospital ( Which is pretty cool! ) and seeing the Home Treatment Team most nights.
It's weird thinking that other people care for me when I've given up! Even if these people are bing paid for caring.
Leg's slow at healing but at my last appointment they think it's catching up to most peoples breaks. It's still got a clear broken line in both legs but now one of them has bone growing around it, like candy floss. I'm happy with that and on one crutch now.
Crazy, mad snow today! Feel sorry for the horses! And walking in the snow on a crutch does suck! We stopped at Sainsburys on the way hoe and I bought a 'Sylar Spock' figure for £2.50 :-] I like things like that. Small pleasures hep delay the obvious.
On the subject of good things, my brother bought me a 'Frankie Boyle' ticket for christmas. Next october. Now I've just got to get through the next few months. Blueagh! Sometimes it feels painful to breath!