figure out what's stopping us...
This week has been such a roller coaster. Work is crazy- surreal things keep happening at the shop. For instance, a man dressed as a gnome (blue outfit, red tights, elf shoes, red cone hat) came in and sat at a corner table making origami flowers for an hour before closing. A man brought his own flask (specific contents unknown but we have guesses) to pour into his latte on Saturday. A customer randomly told me that before she dies (she is probably in her mid forties) she wants to make a movie like Al Gore.
We took Gracie for a walk today. She has a little tiny leash that she loves and parades around like a princess, sniffing things, squeaking. Before that, when I got out of work, it was so beautiful and warm that I walked from my apt to the U District and got bubble tea and a few things at Half Price. I've been trying to at least balance out my junkie-ish breve love with some activity, and since we all know my views on exercise, this has not been an easy task. But as it's getting nicer out, I've been walking everywhere rather than taking my car ten blocks down the street to QFC, or saying to myself "ok, yes, you can have the mango and sticky rice BUT we will walk to Lotus instead of driving like a lazy slacker." And I'm doing yoga/ pilates- which, let me tell you, is making my "core" hurt like nothing else- but some little voice in my head (the one not demanding coffee) keeps saying it's good for me. Hooray for an active lifestyle.
So knowing that I am deeply, decidedly geeky about these sorts of things- why did no one clue me in on how fabulous the movie "awakenings" is? I heart Oliver Sacks. It is scary and then also refreshing to watch movies that document cases and conditions like this one, just in that it's amazing to me that we have come so far and yet still know so little about brain functioning, about neurotransmitters and why drugs make our bodies and our brains react a certain way. What was it about the L-Dopa that caused the encephalitic patients to come out of their catatonic states? And what happened to make them dyskinetic- what is it about L-Dopa that causes this, that we still don't have tangible ways to combat this when it onsets in Parkinson's patients? Ahhhh... This is why I'm going into the research areas I'm hoping for. Too many damn questions.
My dad is coming to visit, I'm picking him up at the airport on Saturday. It will be good, we always have a good time. And Tyler, that adorable lovely boy, is planning something secret for Friday night. He won't give me details, only that I'm to inform my dad I'm not free next Friday evening. Bothersome- I dislike surprises- but it is cute.
I haven't heard back from BU, but I'm assuming it's a no also. Just as well... I don't know that I'm ready to leave Seattle. Things are starting to come together in a way, and I'm excited to see what happens this next year. I've been in a "do it now" mindset lately, scared that if I don't jump now and go for it, it might not happen. That might seem backwards in light of my zen attitude towards grad school, but in terms of getting myself together, in trying to get healthier, to learn more, to read more, to get more experience, it's all now now now or it might never come through. I think part of this is the season- it's been six years as of March 3rd since Jason and Alina died, and even though it's not the clawing gaping pain it was in the beginning, March always makes me a little wistful and melancholy for the loss, and the timing. In some ways I feel like they both would have done such incredible things, that maybe we have to push ourselves harder to make up for the gap? Or at least to try to not take the goodness for granted. I'm lucky, I might not have been able to get into the #2 neuro program in the country- hah- but I have a great research job working with one of the top Health Services/ Quality of Life researchers in the world, and opportunities to grow. And Jaime encouraging me, and everyone being so supportive...
Being a little Pollyanna I suppose, but that's what the pretty weather does to me. Check back when I'm wanting to bang my head against the wall for the sheer frustration of closing without my Brandy tomorrow night.
We took Gracie for a walk today. She has a little tiny leash that she loves and parades around like a princess, sniffing things, squeaking. Before that, when I got out of work, it was so beautiful and warm that I walked from my apt to the U District and got bubble tea and a few things at Half Price. I've been trying to at least balance out my junkie-ish breve love with some activity, and since we all know my views on exercise, this has not been an easy task. But as it's getting nicer out, I've been walking everywhere rather than taking my car ten blocks down the street to QFC, or saying to myself "ok, yes, you can have the mango and sticky rice BUT we will walk to Lotus instead of driving like a lazy slacker." And I'm doing yoga/ pilates- which, let me tell you, is making my "core" hurt like nothing else- but some little voice in my head (the one not demanding coffee) keeps saying it's good for me. Hooray for an active lifestyle.
So knowing that I am deeply, decidedly geeky about these sorts of things- why did no one clue me in on how fabulous the movie "awakenings" is? I heart Oliver Sacks. It is scary and then also refreshing to watch movies that document cases and conditions like this one, just in that it's amazing to me that we have come so far and yet still know so little about brain functioning, about neurotransmitters and why drugs make our bodies and our brains react a certain way. What was it about the L-Dopa that caused the encephalitic patients to come out of their catatonic states? And what happened to make them dyskinetic- what is it about L-Dopa that causes this, that we still don't have tangible ways to combat this when it onsets in Parkinson's patients? Ahhhh... This is why I'm going into the research areas I'm hoping for. Too many damn questions.
My dad is coming to visit, I'm picking him up at the airport on Saturday. It will be good, we always have a good time. And Tyler, that adorable lovely boy, is planning something secret for Friday night. He won't give me details, only that I'm to inform my dad I'm not free next Friday evening. Bothersome- I dislike surprises- but it is cute.
I haven't heard back from BU, but I'm assuming it's a no also. Just as well... I don't know that I'm ready to leave Seattle. Things are starting to come together in a way, and I'm excited to see what happens this next year. I've been in a "do it now" mindset lately, scared that if I don't jump now and go for it, it might not happen. That might seem backwards in light of my zen attitude towards grad school, but in terms of getting myself together, in trying to get healthier, to learn more, to read more, to get more experience, it's all now now now or it might never come through. I think part of this is the season- it's been six years as of March 3rd since Jason and Alina died, and even though it's not the clawing gaping pain it was in the beginning, March always makes me a little wistful and melancholy for the loss, and the timing. In some ways I feel like they both would have done such incredible things, that maybe we have to push ourselves harder to make up for the gap? Or at least to try to not take the goodness for granted. I'm lucky, I might not have been able to get into the #2 neuro program in the country- hah- but I have a great research job working with one of the top Health Services/ Quality of Life researchers in the world, and opportunities to grow. And Jaime encouraging me, and everyone being so supportive...
Being a little Pollyanna I suppose, but that's what the pretty weather does to me. Check back when I'm wanting to bang my head against the wall for the sheer frustration of closing without my Brandy tomorrow night.