Ugh.
I'm not happy today.
I'm tired. I'm sick. I'm desperately lonely. I hate sitting at a desk, ruining my wrists with repetitive data entry that helps my company's bottom line but destroys my soul in the process.
I want to break free.
(I want to break free)
(I want to break free)
I want to break free from your lies
You're so self satisfied I don't need you
I've want to break free
God knows, God knows I want to break free
~ Queen
What do you do when you just can't bring yourself to type in one more sheet of paper? What do you do when you want to dump your school onto someone else's lap because you're sick of dealing with it? What do you do when you're so desperately lonely and needing someone to love you and understand you?
You break free.
But how? How do you escape a prison that you yourself helped to create? They fashioned the bars and the walls and you walked right into the cell and closed the gate behind you. So now what? Are you a hypocrite for trying to break out of this jail that you so willingly walked into? Do you have any right to feel angry, sad, depressed, or lonely?
Fuck yeah, you do.
But while feeling those things, you have to do something about it, something other than sitting around pouring your heart out to your online journal, one that you have to use a proxy to get to anyway because your company banned its use.
I want to get out of Arizona. I can't stand it here. I never liked it here. I want to move to San Diego, or LA, or New York.
I can't stand how everywhere you go, you're bombarded with pictures of happy couples, and find your soulmate at this singles site, or be matched up by 29 dimensions of compatibility at this site, and everywhere you look everyone else is just so flippin' happy, reminding you just how alone you are. It sucks. And what also sucks is that they pick the most perfect looking people for those ads - guy with ripped abs and girl with flawless skin and blonde hair. What they don't show is the guys who REALLY hit on you - bald, fat, jobless, selfish, sexist creeps. Or the super nice guy who would practically die for you but unfortunately you just aren't attracted to and when you tell the super nice guy that, they suddenly rain hellfire down on you like you are the devil incarnate, call you a bunch of nasty names (so much for being the nice guy), then skulk away grumbling about how nice guys finish last.
I hate how you take a job right after high school because your a-hole of a mom won't let you leave the state to go to the art school of your choice, and you just keep working so you can afford to move away from your a-hole mother, and then before you know it 10 years have passed and you're still living in Arizona, working at jobs you can't stand to pay for shit you don't really want and you still haven't gone to art school.
I wish I was 8. Life was much simpler when I was 8. All I needed were cartoons, Kool-aid, and my blankie and I was a happy little clam. Fuck this grown-up shit. I quit.
I'm tired. I'm sick. I'm desperately lonely. I hate sitting at a desk, ruining my wrists with repetitive data entry that helps my company's bottom line but destroys my soul in the process.
I want to break free.
(I want to break free)
(I want to break free)
I want to break free from your lies
You're so self satisfied I don't need you
I've want to break free
God knows, God knows I want to break free
~ Queen
What do you do when you just can't bring yourself to type in one more sheet of paper? What do you do when you want to dump your school onto someone else's lap because you're sick of dealing with it? What do you do when you're so desperately lonely and needing someone to love you and understand you?
You break free.
But how? How do you escape a prison that you yourself helped to create? They fashioned the bars and the walls and you walked right into the cell and closed the gate behind you. So now what? Are you a hypocrite for trying to break out of this jail that you so willingly walked into? Do you have any right to feel angry, sad, depressed, or lonely?
Fuck yeah, you do.
But while feeling those things, you have to do something about it, something other than sitting around pouring your heart out to your online journal, one that you have to use a proxy to get to anyway because your company banned its use.
I want to get out of Arizona. I can't stand it here. I never liked it here. I want to move to San Diego, or LA, or New York.
I can't stand how everywhere you go, you're bombarded with pictures of happy couples, and find your soulmate at this singles site, or be matched up by 29 dimensions of compatibility at this site, and everywhere you look everyone else is just so flippin' happy, reminding you just how alone you are. It sucks. And what also sucks is that they pick the most perfect looking people for those ads - guy with ripped abs and girl with flawless skin and blonde hair. What they don't show is the guys who REALLY hit on you - bald, fat, jobless, selfish, sexist creeps. Or the super nice guy who would practically die for you but unfortunately you just aren't attracted to and when you tell the super nice guy that, they suddenly rain hellfire down on you like you are the devil incarnate, call you a bunch of nasty names (so much for being the nice guy), then skulk away grumbling about how nice guys finish last.
I hate how you take a job right after high school because your a-hole of a mom won't let you leave the state to go to the art school of your choice, and you just keep working so you can afford to move away from your a-hole mother, and then before you know it 10 years have passed and you're still living in Arizona, working at jobs you can't stand to pay for shit you don't really want and you still haven't gone to art school.
I wish I was 8. Life was much simpler when I was 8. All I needed were cartoons, Kool-aid, and my blankie and I was a happy little clam. Fuck this grown-up shit. I quit.