Big Update...
Yea, I know I havent been on here for a good long time...been really stressed, angry, irritated, upset, sad, out of control basically. Im getting a little better...theres so much going on right now that Im freaking out and found myself in a REALLY big, scary rut with something and cant get out. I kinda' messed things up with Brett and I...which I really feel bad about but I know noone thinks I do. Im apparently heartless and lie...which Im not...and dont. I just ran into some troubles...long story! I spent V-day just the way I like it...alone...doing nothing...pretending it's just another day. I DID see Shaun for a very short amount of time...which was nice...I went to my Aunt and Uncles anniversary last night and was pretty much myself again...but it was all kinda' pretend so noone would notice I was so fuckered up. I was laughing and being gay like normal, funny how well people can fake a smile. I miss Jenni Poos and feel like I havent seen or talked to her in forever, which bothers me. She's like my best friend and has kept me glued together for the most part. Everyone is worried because Ive been acting weird and stuff lately. I cant make anything right at the moment so I just hope my good, true friends hang in there...I cut my finger tip open the other night and thought I would bleed to death [not REALLY] because it had the "splatter effect" and ended up all over the sweatshirt...my PINK sweathshirt!! Im getting my tat Friday night...thank god, Im so excited. Im talking to Drew...AKA: Hair Doll Boy...compliments to Cait. He's always been around and kinda' keeps sneaking back into my life somehow, dont know exactly what all that means but I supposse Ill figure it out eventually. I just wanna' chill, I need a vacation soon. I need a JOB by March 1st because I quit my AM job...Im hoping to work at Dover with Jenni Poos but I dont know if they will take me...Im hoping she can pull some strings or something but I hate asking her because its not HER problem, it's my own. My car is getting fixed...that's cool, Ive been driving my truck everywhere...lots of gas, my 2nd life problem is almost resolved...that's unreal, and Ive spent over $350.00 in like...two days...THAT sucks!! Anyways, just figured I would fill all you lovely viewers in on my life as I know it because I know how intently you guys wait for me to update this ish!! Im off to get Cait from school...