Regrets? I’ve got a few…
An hour ago, I received an email from the roommate of a good friend of mine, whom I’ve been trying to contact for a while now. As it turns out, my friend died September last year of complications during an operation to remove a tumor from her brain. Sandra had been fighting for years against returning brain cancer. It was the main reason she had to bow out of competing for the Canadian Olympic Athletic team when she was younger. She never let on how bad it got, not even to her closest friends and family. She lived her life to the fullest.
We never met face to face. We’d planned on it for last year, but her health precluded that. Last time we emailed, was in July last year. She told me how she wasn’t going to Germany that year, like she’d planned because her health took a turn for the worse.
When we talked, no topic was off limits. From conspiracy theories to more personal topics, everything and anything could be and was talked about. We met for the first time, in one of those online chatrooms with 3D avatars. From there, we learned more and more about each other.
After our last talk, I didn’t make the time to email her as often as I used to do. Also, the fact she left the chatroom I was using for another limited our time spend chatting. Every few weeks, I’d sent an email to her, but never received any reply. Truth be told, I wasn’t really worried. Too much to do, what with work, family and other stuff. And now, finding out she’s gone.
My cousin, a guy I hang out with a lot, recently had a heart attack. They had to put him in a coma for five days before they did a triple bypass on him. My mom, has been suffering from all kinds of stuff, predominantly listlessness, that I keep thinking is maybe related to the winter weather we’re having, since it’s not something she’s known for. And now this?
It really hits home.
Do I have regrets? If there is one, it’s not saying “To Hell with It” and going over there myself and seeing her.
Sandra, wherever you may be, it’s time to rest.
Love,
Saffi