hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul...
i write. it's what i do. it helps me. i'm okay now. matt and i had a good talk today. we're gonna be friends, or rather i guess we are friends. that makes me happy...because there is no reason we shouldn't be. at the same time, i can't help but wonder if i will ever truly be 'over him.' i can't necessarily say that i want to be, but i don't really have a choice...i need to be. i hate when people try to relate, because they can't. it's not just...oh we broke up. there is other stuff going on...stuff bigger than losing a relationship. i'm gonna be here to help, and to be his friend and to be a shoulder to lean on. i hope that one day i am able to understand why this all happened. my mind is so boggled and so clear and...just everything, all at the same time.
i want him to realize how great he is, how wonderful, what an amazing person he is...all of those things that words are never enough for. all of those things that are indescribable, where words can only begin to scratch the surface. i want him to be okay, to be happy. i want myself to be be all of that too, and i think i will be. i know he will be too but i just wish i could help.
i have come up with a million and one solutions for me to regroup and just 'get away' but i need something larger than life right now. i need hope. i think i have found strength, but hope is where i feel i am lacking. i know i can't be 100% okay and i know things take time.
i just need hope that things will be okay for everyone, not just me. i'm so scared.
and you know...the other thing is...when it rains, it pours.
life is funny. it is heart-wrenching. it is difficult. if you are lucky, you'll find a few moments, few and far between, that will make you feel happiness like you've never felt.
i want him to realize how great he is, how wonderful, what an amazing person he is...all of those things that words are never enough for. all of those things that are indescribable, where words can only begin to scratch the surface. i want him to be okay, to be happy. i want myself to be be all of that too, and i think i will be. i know he will be too but i just wish i could help.
i have come up with a million and one solutions for me to regroup and just 'get away' but i need something larger than life right now. i need hope. i think i have found strength, but hope is where i feel i am lacking. i know i can't be 100% okay and i know things take time.
i just need hope that things will be okay for everyone, not just me. i'm so scared.
and you know...the other thing is...when it rains, it pours.
life is funny. it is heart-wrenching. it is difficult. if you are lucky, you'll find a few moments, few and far between, that will make you feel happiness like you've never felt.