heat-makers! this the jam, yup, put your hands up!
So normally this would go on my LJ under lock and key where I bitch about why my fic actually gets off on making me miserable and unable to do anything besides chew my gum angrily and stare myself blind at a blinking cursor- HOWEVER! I'm thinking that I'll try something different (and hopefully more effective) in an effort to combat a fucking redic
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But that stuff is all basic for like... the mechanics? If it's a confidence issue, then that's different. lol You know I talk my shit and whatever, but it's always hard getting yourself to write when you feel like it might be in vain. Like putting down lines and wondering if people are reading them or if you're just too damn irrelevant for them to even bother skimming. But idk this fandom is huge and even if it's only a few people, there's bound to be someone who checks for your updates? I go back and read comments and try to remind myself that there are people who don't think my fic is the worst thing to happen to fandom. Getting down on yourself will no doubt block your ability to write. But also, as hard as it is, you gotta try to get back into a place where you're writing this for yourself. Which is why I think it's a good idea to look at what you're writing and really think about why you're doing it. I'm writing something I know will get passed over, but I love the 'verse and I love Kibum and in the end that's worth more to me than comment count- which we know is, for the most part, arbitrary anyway. Be confident in what you've got to offer and consider your improvements and know that things take time and there are no guarantees or measures for success- all the effort and the emotion that you put into a fic are worth so much more, you can't let a few off-handed words or numbers make or break you. You have to do that kind of thing, through your attitude and work, for yourself. /sigh, I stopped making sense on like the first sentence in. Coherency, I do not have it ;;
Honestly? It was the fact that people hated him before he'd given them a reason. So I thought, well shit, he's making them real fucking nervous- and you know they hate on you if you're a threat, so there must be something really fucking epic about this guy. Lo and behold rofl he is straight up fabulous. Plus he just looked really, really intense at some parts in Super Girl and then they'd cut to a clip of him laughing and trying to dance and looking like an utter goober and I was like ROFL ROFL SHEEP IN WOLF'S CLOTHING, K FANDOM? He's got a bit of a devil-may-care attitude and I find that to be the most appealing thing ever. He's so strong in the face of all the undeserved bullshit he gets, he never lets them see him sweat and keeps on doing whatever the fuck he likes with a smile on like, lol u still wish u were me~ I really admire his strength and perseverance and the fact that he doesn't let any of this make him bitter- to me, that would be an impossible task, but he makes it look effortless. I wanna stick him on my bias list so badly but I think having four biases might be a bit much >.> but gfdi, like it or not, I'm pretty sure he's on it anyways ;;
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Ah yes, in my colossal narcissism, I felt like you tailored your second part of the comment just for me ;______; and if so, I am eternally grateful ♥ . I do waver between moments were I'm wondering if all I'm doing is in vain because I'm not good enough no matter how much I improve from my first fic and moments where I let things go and just want to indulge my own fantasies about my OTPs and how they interact with each other regardless whether people want to read it or not. You made a lot of sense bby and I am bolstered by it /pumps fist.
Oh my god, yesssss, Zhou Mi has earned my and so many other people's utmost respect for everything he's been through and not only not be embittered by it, but still remains ~fabulous~ and kind and just beautiful inside and out. But wait, who are your four biases? I'm counting them up and seem to running short if it's sans Zhou Mi. Anyway, don't mind me /creeps like a creepy creeper.
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lmao lmao, negl I did~ We've got the same affliction lol not having the confidence/constant feedback can definitely destroy any desire to write. But I think your good and I think my taste is good too :3 So you're all set~ AND TOTALLY WRITE WHATEVER THE HELL YOU WANT \O/////
fffffffffffff right? I have no idea how he manages, he's just a complete miracle to me and I wish I could be as chill about shit as he is. Biases tho lol In no particular order~ Kangin, Yesung and Shindong (THROWS ZHOU MI IN THERE BECAUSE THE FUCKER WILL NOT TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER. GODDAMN HIS ADORABLE PERSONALITY BITING ME IN THE ASS)
/ROLLS ON YOU ADORINGLY
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