(no subject)
this week i've come to feel that : there's really nothing special about me.
i feel like a waste of space, but i don't want to be!
i want to feel like i'm doing something.
but i feel like it's going to have to wait.
and that life will get better in two weeks. when i move.
but sometimes i feel like i'm just kidding myself.
only tomorrow and monday left of summer school. thank goodness.i hate it.
i have a huge project due on monday for analytical reasoning.
and i really need to start on it.
but instead here i am watching food network instead.
i went to chico this weekend. it was fun. strange a little, but good.
i called burnside on saturday, for the first time in 3 months.
he hasn't said a word to me since the beginning of may.
i called because it was his birthday. he's 23 now.
i figured he wouldn't pick up, so i was going to just leave a nice message.
but he answered. i tried to keep our conversation short and told him i was just calling to wish him a happy birthday. he asked me about stuff though, like when i'm coming back to chico. i told him, and he was like "i'll probably see you soon then" it was weird. like...he was talking like nothing had happened. like he hasn't been avoiding me for the last three months.
we'll see what happens. hopefully we'll be okay. i miss him.
i think it was smart not trying to talk to him this time. we'll see.
hopefully we can be friends.
but ugh, i'm trying not to be, but i'm sick of being alone.
I JUST WANT TO MOVE ALREADY. i hope things get better.
on the upside...harry potter VII is amazing!!!
i feel like a waste of space, but i don't want to be!
i want to feel like i'm doing something.
but i feel like it's going to have to wait.
and that life will get better in two weeks. when i move.
but sometimes i feel like i'm just kidding myself.
only tomorrow and monday left of summer school. thank goodness.i hate it.
i have a huge project due on monday for analytical reasoning.
and i really need to start on it.
but instead here i am watching food network instead.
i went to chico this weekend. it was fun. strange a little, but good.
i called burnside on saturday, for the first time in 3 months.
he hasn't said a word to me since the beginning of may.
i called because it was his birthday. he's 23 now.
i figured he wouldn't pick up, so i was going to just leave a nice message.
but he answered. i tried to keep our conversation short and told him i was just calling to wish him a happy birthday. he asked me about stuff though, like when i'm coming back to chico. i told him, and he was like "i'll probably see you soon then" it was weird. like...he was talking like nothing had happened. like he hasn't been avoiding me for the last three months.
we'll see what happens. hopefully we'll be okay. i miss him.
i think it was smart not trying to talk to him this time. we'll see.
hopefully we can be friends.
but ugh, i'm trying not to be, but i'm sick of being alone.
I JUST WANT TO MOVE ALREADY. i hope things get better.
on the upside...harry potter VII is amazing!!!