A Nerd Fallacy

[sistermagpie]

I threw out a little theory on Fandom!Secrets that had to do with something I've been thinking about lately...I hesitate to say it because it’s a simple answer for a complicated thing done by many different people, but I still wonder if there's not a strain of this in fandom.

Comments

[sistermagpie]

I definitely think the social aspect is sometimes the most damning. And just that whole...what you totally describe here. First that there's a resentment of people putting their minds towards social situations at all, caring about those sorts of things. It's hard not to relate that to the many metas I've read about people who definitely want to be seen as the person who can't do that, who just doesn't have that ability (even though it's really not being presented as an ability but the sign of a weaker character), or claims that fandom social groups are based around completely different things that reject all of that. Which is why it's sometimes funny to read the many things about the first part, where people talk about BNFs in fandom being those cool kids because it's like some people need that story in their lives no matter what. Like it's more about their defining themselves as being shut out by this vague concept of "cool" than whatever is really going on. Heh. Like there was that one person who did a whole history of the BNF clique and I remember it reading like it was written by some sort of alien who didn't believe people could ever become friends without it being part of some master plan.

Or also Archie and Nero Wolfe where Archie is totally the Watson character, and he doesn't share Nero's particular genius (or the crippling rigidity that goes with them) but you'd be a fool to think of Archie as dumb just because he makes that part of his persona as much as Nero makes his quirks part of his. Archie's facility with language and his ability to understand people is a form of high intelligence in himself.

I definitely think McCoy has an advantage there being a doctor, though. Doctor is a specific skill that people can appreciate while keeping within its limits.

Here via metafandom.

[baka_kit]

First that there's a resentment of people putting their minds towards social situations at all, caring about those sorts of things. It's hard not to relate that to the many metas I've read about people who definitely want to be seen as the person who can't do that, who just doesn't have that ability (even though it's really not being presented as an ability but the sign of a weaker character)

I'm trying -- and failing -- to figure this one out. Maybe because I don't see it as some magical ability that some people are granted and others aren't, but as a specific set of skills, which to some extent can be picked up by most people?

I was one of those poorly socialized fen. Ridiculously awkward and had a had time with social cues. But I made a conscious decision to learn to emulate proper social behavior. I'm still shy, especially around groups of new people, but I can handle myself.

Obviously, some people are born with a natural talent for socializing, just like for singing or gymnastics or whatever. And maybe all of my hard work will never get to the level that some people can achieve effortlessly. But my experience at picking up the skill of social interaction (like learning to sing) has given me new ways to express myself. In the end, the hard work was worth it. And as a bonus, I find myself a lot less resentful of the people who have that particular talent.

I'm rambling a bit, I know. Migraine meds are starting to kick in.

Re: Here via metafandom.

[sistermagpie]

I'm trying -- and failing -- to figure this one out. Maybe because I don't see it as some magical ability that some people are granted and others aren't, but as a specific set of skills, which to some extent can be picked up by most people?

That is a really good point. In a way sometimes intelligence gets seen the same way, where people want to make it a magical ability that appears in only certain ways. When really social ability is a combination of different things and is definitely something you can learn. Even people who would be considered good at it sometimes stumble if they're in a different social setting where they don't know the rules or the signals are different. But sometimes the people who want to define themselves as incapable of that sort of thing are really saying that they want to be the person who doesn't do it.