Re: REVISION REQUESTEDfoundaplaceNovember 22 2010, 00:51:36 UTC
Sorry for being such a pest; I'm used to games with less-stringent requirements, so I didn't really put my all into my first drafts. Here we go!
Personality: Miwako grew up highly sheltered; she was kept so far in the dark by her parents that she never even realized the purpose of the medicine she took or the surgeries she underwent. She's quiet and shy; talking to strangers practically gives her a panic attack. For a very long time, she was confused and ashamed of her body. She believed that it was impossible for anyone to love her because of it. Since meeting Haru, she's grown stronger and slightly more outgoing, and has learned to embrace all of herself. She doesn't want to tell anyone else about being I.S. because she doesn't want to have to explain what it means, but she's finally admitted it to herself.
Miwako started out as a very girly girl, wearing long, flowing clothes and with an interest in flowers. Though she states that she leans more toward being a girl, now that she's accepted her intersexuality she seems more interested in breaking down gender boundaries. She laments that after finally accepting herself for who she is, she has to wrap herself in the symbol of a gender (her school uniform) to go outside; and though she wouldn't mind being a princess, she's more interested in going after her prince on her own rather than waiting for him to come to her. It's not an automatic change of mind; she still has her doubts and still wonders if she can actually achieve happiness as she is, but she takes it one step at a time and that seems to work pretty well.
Miwako is quiet and keeps to herself, but when someone says something ignorant or hurtful to her she can explode. Without even thinking about it, she'll start shouting about how the person she's talking to doesn't know the first thing about anything. It's clear that she never intends to make anyone feel bad or hurt their feelings, but she can't help blowing up. Once she realizes what she's done, she'll get quiet, even run away to hide if possible.
She hasn't had many people accept her for who she is, so she gets a bit clingy and desperate when she finds someone who does. She can be frighteningly passive-aggressive; when she and Haru discuss Haru's crush on a boy named Kenji, she encourages Haru to go for it... because she's sure that it would end in disaster and Haru would rebound onto her. She's not a bad person at heart, but she can't stand the thought of being alone and she still has an instinctive fear of being rejected because of her body, so she does what she believes she has to.
Sample:
It was raining. Miwako didn't like the rain -- it made her hair cling to her head and weighed her clothes down -- but she had to walk through it to get home, now that she'd started attending school again. Her mind was racing, as usual; today had been better than yesterday, which had been better than the day before. It did get better the more she pushed herself. Maybe, eventually, she would stop trembling when she spoke to people. Maybe someday...
Her train of thought cut itself off. She was looking down at the sidewalk as she went, so she noticed the box and was able to keep from stumbling over it. Curious, she knelt down and picked it up. There was a little plastic window on the top, through which she could see...
"A cake?" She looked the box over -- it was from Haru's father's bakery. Of course it was; that was the closest bakery from here. But that didn't really explain why it was sitting out in the middle of the sidewalk.
Miwako suppressed a smile as she realized what this meant. She'd have a perfectly good excuse to go there and ask about it -- and Haru should be working today, too. What a pleasant surprise.
That's fine, samples are my weak point, so it's my fault! Would it be all right to link to a thread where she's not only from an earlier canon point, but also AU and a mutant?
I'm going to work on an actual non-fail sample just in case the answer is no.
What to do now: ♥ Put in a request to join queenofheartsrp, queenoflogs, and queenofooc. ♥ If necessary for your character, create a permissions post. ♥ Go here and fill out the form to have your character put on the taken list. ♥ Optionally, join queenofwhat (our community for spam, memes, and general fooling around). ♥ Once your membership has been approved, introduce yourself in queenofooc so we can get to know you and your character.
Personality: Miwako grew up highly sheltered; she was kept so far in the dark by her parents that she never even realized the purpose of the medicine she took or the surgeries she underwent. She's quiet and shy; talking to strangers practically gives her a panic attack. For a very long time, she was confused and ashamed of her body. She believed that it was impossible for anyone to love her because of it. Since meeting Haru, she's grown stronger and slightly more outgoing, and has learned to embrace all of herself. She doesn't want to tell anyone else about being I.S. because she doesn't want to have to explain what it means, but she's finally admitted it to herself.
Miwako started out as a very girly girl, wearing long, flowing clothes and with an interest in flowers. Though she states that she leans more toward being a girl, now that she's accepted her intersexuality she seems more interested in breaking down gender boundaries. She laments that after finally accepting herself for who she is, she has to wrap herself in the symbol of a gender (her school uniform) to go outside; and though she wouldn't mind being a princess, she's more interested in going after her prince on her own rather than waiting for him to come to her. It's not an automatic change of mind; she still has her doubts and still wonders if she can actually achieve happiness as she is, but she takes it one step at a time and that seems to work pretty well.
Miwako is quiet and keeps to herself, but when someone says something ignorant or hurtful to her she can explode. Without even thinking about it, she'll start shouting about how the person she's talking to doesn't know the first thing about anything. It's clear that she never intends to make anyone feel bad or hurt their feelings, but she can't help blowing up. Once she realizes what she's done, she'll get quiet, even run away to hide if possible.
She hasn't had many people accept her for who she is, so she gets a bit clingy and desperate when she finds someone who does. She can be frighteningly passive-aggressive; when she and Haru discuss Haru's crush on a boy named Kenji, she encourages Haru to go for it... because she's sure that it would end in disaster and Haru would rebound onto her. She's not a bad person at heart, but she can't stand the thought of being alone and she still has an instinctive fear of being rejected because of her body, so she does what she believes she has to.
Sample:
It was raining. Miwako didn't like the rain -- it made her hair cling to her head and weighed her clothes down -- but she had to walk through it to get home, now that she'd started attending school again. Her mind was racing, as usual; today had been better than yesterday, which had been better than the day before. It did get better the more she pushed herself. Maybe, eventually, she would stop trembling when she spoke to people. Maybe someday...
Her train of thought cut itself off. She was looking down at the sidewalk as she went, so she noticed the box and was able to keep from stumbling over it. Curious, she knelt down and picked it up. There was a little plastic window on the top, through which she could see...
"A cake?" She looked the box over -- it was from Haru's father's bakery. Of course it was; that was the closest bakery from here. But that didn't really explain why it was sitting out in the middle of the sidewalk.
Miwako suppressed a smile as she realized what this meant. She'd have a perfectly good excuse to go there and ask about it -- and Haru should be working today, too. What a pleasant surprise.
Reply
(Sorry for requesting twice! I actually really like the character concept.)
Reply
That's fine, samples are my weak point, so it's my fault! Would it be all right to link to a thread where she's not only from an earlier canon point, but also AU and a mutant?
I'm going to work on an actual non-fail sample just in case the answer is no.
Reply
What to do now:
♥ Put in a request to join queenofheartsrp, queenoflogs, and queenofooc.
♥ If necessary for your character, create a permissions post.
♥ Go here and fill out the form to have your character put on the taken list.
♥ Optionally, join queenofwhat (our community for spam, memes, and general fooling around).
♥ Once your membership has been approved, introduce yourself in queenofooc so we can get to know you and your character.
Reply
Leave a comment