Picfic: Olaf's Table
Olaf: *sigh* I've been sitting on my butt for hours and I still don't have any customers. How will I write down people's Christmas lists, give in depth psychological evaluations, tell the future and hand out free hot chocolate all at the low low price of one penny if I have no customers? *gasp* I know! I'll just find some customers! Now, where to look...where to look. Hey! You two down there!
Olaf: Hi I'm Olaf and I like warm hugs! Do you guys want to be my customers? I'll make sure your Christmas lists get to the north pole and we have free hot chocolate.
Boy: *whisper* Keep your eyes closed and he'll go away.
Olaf: Hello? Anyone in there? Oh, you must be sleeping. Maybe next time. Hmmm. *gasp* Look! More people!
Olaf: Hi I'm Olaf and I like warm hugs! I have a business located at this very table that I'm laying on! I'm highly qualified and have a PhD in fun!
Duckie: Quack!
Olaf: Yes, quack! Do you want to come over? It only costs one penny!
Duckie: No.
Marshmallow: But...that was our table last year...
Olaf: Hi!
Snuffles: You know, this was Marshmallow's and my table last year and we really loved it---
Olaf: Oh, no. I stole your table? Oh no...oh no. I have guilt...oh no...oh no...the pain is unbearable.
Snuffles: Don't feel guilt, it's alright. We just wanted to know if we can maybe use it again every once and a while?
Olaf: Oh, sure! Do you want me to tell your future or something? It only costs one penny.
Snuffles: Maybe another time. See ya later Olaf.
Olaf: Now what...there's no one else around... *sigh*
Olaf: *sigh*
Olaf: *sigh*
Olaf: *sigh sigh sigh*
Walter: *off camera* Hey Olaf!
Walter: Whatchya doing?
Olaf: Oh, I opened a business at this table here and no one is showing up. It's getting pretty boring.
Walter: Oh...hey I know! I can help you and be your businessmuppet!
Olaf: Yeah! What's a businessmuppet?
Walter: I just help you with your getting your new business started and stuff.
Olaf: Oh!
Walter: Ok, first things first! Your business needs a name and a sign. I came up with this. What do you think?
Walter: *off camera* Since your name is Olaf and your business is located at a table I thought is was appropriate to name your business Olaf's Table. Catchy right? And this is your sign. Look, your face is the O!
Olaf: Oh, I love it! Now my business is perfect!
Water: *off camera* Aaaand...
Walter: Tada! This is where your customers put the monies.
Olaf: 'Give us your monies here'. Oh I like that!
Walter: Now you just need a customer! I'll be right back!
Walter: This is Little Scoops, Olaf. He's your very first customer.
Little Scoops: H-h-hi.
Walter: Don't be nervous Little Scoops, Olaf is an expert. At least I think he is...not that I've ever seen him do anything...hey Olaf what's this business about anyway?
Olaf: Christmas lists, psychological evaluations, futures and free hot chocolate. Speaking of futures... I'm sorry Walter but you have to leave now. If I tell anyone else other than Little Scoops his future it won't come true.
Walter: But I'm your businessmuppet...Alright I'll go. But I better get precentage of that penny.
Olaf: Sure! We'll get a chainsaw and cut the pennies I get in half at the end of the day.
Walter: Ok! Sounds good! I'll sit over there and hand out the hot chocolate.
Little Scoops: So...um...
Olaf: Wait! Monies first!
Little Scoops: Oh, sorry.
Olaf: Uh, I've never done this before so uh...Hi! I'm Olaf and I like warm hugs! What do you want for Christmas this year? My friend Elsa is good friends with The Snow God so I can get you whatever you want!
Little Scoops: Anything?
Olaf: Anything!
Little Scoops: There's nothing I want more in the world but to be taller. My twin brother, Big Scoops, is at least four snowballs taller than me. It makes me feel so weak and inferior.
Olaf: Aw, but it's not how tall you that matters but what's inside. If you had a ticking time bomb inside that would problematic but you have snow inside and I love snow! Who knows maybe one day you'll grow wings and learn to fly! Then you'll be taller than everybody!
Little Scoops: Oh, you know, you're right. That makes me feel much better. Thanks Olaf. So what's my future?
Olaf: Beats me! You should go and check to see if Walter has finished making the free hot chocolate though. Enjoy!
Mr. Top Hat: Is this where we put in our lists for the North Pole this year?
Olaf: Yeah! Monies first though.
Mr. Top Hat: Let's see, I need some top hat shiner, shoe shiner, button shiner, sled shiner, sleigh shiner and teeth shiner.
Olaf: Hmmm, it seems like you love shining things. Also, you have no teeth so why would you need teeth shiner? That's very peculiar.
Mr. Top Hat: Why...yes. I guess I do love shining things. I think it's because I own a sleigh body shop so I'm always shining sleighs. I never realized I didn't have teeth though.
Olaf: See? You learn something new about yourself every day! Ok, now for your future! You will eat a single strawberry on Friday!
Mr. Top Hat: Hmm, interesting. Thank you Olaf this has been a very fullfilling experience.
Olaf: You're welcome! Walter is handing out the free hot chocolate so be sure to grab some. Have fun shining things. Bye! Next customer!
Cottonball: And I want a step machine, a motorcycle, a hand bag for my hand weights, a pilates set, some dumbbells---
Olaf: Oh you shouldn't call yourself dumb. I don't think you're dumb. You seem like a very intellegent snowman!
Cottonball: *tears up* Thank you. You know everybody sees me as this dumb, macho tough guy who doesn't know what 2+2 is but I'm actually a really sensitive guy and I love to read. Thank you for seeing me for who I really am.
Olaf: No problem! Ok, it's future time! You will get a speck of dust in your eye tomorrow so go and buy some eyewash! Remember there is free hot chocolate on the way out! Next customer!
Mr. Cool: I want some cool sunglasses, some cool gloves, a cool iphone, and a cool ice cube because I'm a cool dude. Cool cool cool cool cool.
Olaf: Cool! You seem very cool indeed but don't forget to bring some warmth into your life as well. Haha, did you like that? I found it on a a fortune cookie. I remebered it because I love warmth! Anyway...Do you want to hear your future now?
Mr. Cool: Sounds cool.
Olaf: You will sleep until noon on Wednesday!
Mr. Cool: Cool. See you later, cool dude.
Olaf: Bye! Don't forget your free hot chocolate!
Olaf: I guess that's it for the customers today. Now I have to work on making all my new friends' wishes come true!
???: *clears throat*
Olaf: Hi! Sorry we're closed.
Snowcap: I've brought a gold coin as a bribe.
Olaf: Well...alright! I can't turn down a friend in need!
Snowcap: I need you send my Christmas list to the north pole, evaluate my psychological state and tell my future. The whole caboodle! Also, I demand that you give me two cups of hot chocolate instead of one. DO YOU HEAR ME!
Olaf: You seem stressed. I think you need a warm hug!
Snowcap: NO HUGS! I'M FEELING TOO MUCH ENNUI FOR HUGS!
Olaf: Oh...hey do you mind if I sit on the table? I've ran out of creative ways to sit on this chair.
Snowcap: Oh no, not at all.
Snowcap: I've been feeling a sense of deep sorrow and woe this Christmas season. First things first, I've been working on this world domination thing for a couple years now and sometimes I feel like things are never going to go anywhere. It's a dream of mine to have the planet Earth reshaped in my image but that dream seems so far away. Also, last year there were a couple of things I asked Santa to get me for Christmas that he didn't get me, namely my very own kingdom and a bellydancing DVD. The pain of not getting that bellydancing DVD is a pain that still resides with me to this day and I don't think I can take another stab in the gut like that. Olaf? Hey are you still listening, Olaf?
Olaf: Huh? Oh, of course!
Carrotnose: *off camera* Snowcap come back here! Give me my gold coin back!
Snowcap: Uh, hehe, I actually stole that gold coin from my brother and now he's looking for me sooooo....BYE!
Olaf: Bye, Snowcap! Oh, wait I forgot to give you your future. Um, you will trip on a patch of ice on the very near future! Be careful!
Snowcap: *off camera* *trips on a patch of ice* OOOOUCH!!!!
Olaf: I did say the very near future.
Snowcap: *off camera* SHUT UP!
Olaf: Hmm, last customer of the day! Now I need to get started on my next project! But first I need a nice cup of hot chocolate!
THE END.
Let's just forget the fact that Olaf and Snowcap are supposed to be on adventure together right now alright? Lol.
Wow that took forever to write. I apologize if there's any typos, grammar problems or text missing. I've read this thing so many time I've become blind to the mistakes. I hope it's enjoyable and the jokes don't fall flat. It's far too late to get started on the other Picfic I wanted to post but it'll be up tomorrow.
Also, the ending with Snowcap tripping on the patch of ice, is a little reference to a running gag in the Muppets Family Christmas special. I highly recommend Muppet Family Christmas (http://youtu.be/ojtGHXsTXmU), it might be my favorite Christmas special ever. And the Muppets' Christmas music video (http://youtu.be/zEgcLrgxUOw) they did with CeeLo Green last year is awesome as well. Especially Walter's part at 2:50. Those are my Christmas recommendations for the year. Lol.
Merry Christmas again! :D