This time tomorrow I'll be at the airport

Jan 30, 2012 21:38




I'm almost all packed (except for my laptop, my laptop charging cable, my handphone and a pouch of last minute toiletries like powder, lip balm and a comb I'll need in the morning) for tomorrow morning's flight to Perth. I'll be studying Classics and Ancient History (and considering double majoring in Medieval and Early Modern History) at the University of Western Australia, though Orientation only starts on February 13th and classes start on the 27th.

Everyone keeps assuming I'm excited and can't wait to go. Yeah, I guess I am, a little bit. I want to study these things. But I'm also afraid.

I mean, for one, I'm going to be living in a new country. I've got to learn to get around, to take care of my own groceries and laundry and so on (at least I did usually go with Dad and do most of the house's grocery shopping, so I'm somewhat used to that, and I always do my own laundry and washing up and cleaning and so on anyway), to get used to living in a place where most of the shops close at 5pm after living in Singapore with its 24-hour shopping malls and eateries, to not being able to leave the cockroaches to Dad to kill, to learn to pay bills, to just pretty much live on my own. Yes, I will be living with an Indian family (an old student of my dad's and her husband and kids) so I don't have to worry about rent or electricity bills, but they're not vegetarian and I am and I cannot expect them to provide for me so I'll probably have to cook for myself, and if I'm tired after class it's bread or cereal for me. Also, I have a terrible sense of direction, and if I get lost there I can't ask Dad to come pick me up.

I wasn't this scared at first, but my family is all, "YOU CAN'T SURVIVE ON YOUR OWN!" and scolding me and lecturing me about everything and it really frustrates and stresses me. :/

And the daunting prospect of being on my own aside, I'm also worried about university. I love Greek and Roman myth, history and culture, and am definitely excited by the prospect of learning Latin and Greek. But despite all the books I've read and the documentaries I've watched, I've never actually studied them in school (obviously) or written essays or learned Latin sentence structure, and I have no idea how good I'll be at all that. Plus I pretty much had 2011 off from school, and I feel like my brain's decayed a little. XD

Also, I hated secondary school. I was miserable and even suicidal, briefly. (Thankfully a dear friend talked me out of that and I have never considered it since.) I struggled in almost every subject but English, English Literature and Geography (though Tamil was okay), and I was a social outcast and teased and bullied and lonely. Junior college was amazing, though; I finally came to accept myself and was really happy there, and leaving it made me sad; I still miss it. I really hope that university will be a bit like junior college in that aspect, but part of me can't help but fear that it'll be more like secondary school. *points to icon*

Still, for years I've identified as a Gryffindor (even if Pottermore did put me in Ravenclaw). I'm scared, sure, but I have a chance to study something I love and I wouldn't give that up for fear. Hell, I've packed my Gryffindor scarf and I'm going to wear it proudly in winter. XD

Australia, here I come.

Also, it's January 30th, so HAPPY BIRTHDAY LILY EVANS-POTTER! ♥

This entry was originally posted at http://sivaroobini.dreamwidth.org/73388.html. Please comment there using OpenID.

uwa, friends and family, school (essays and stuff), harry potter

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