005 [video]

[azarathmetrion]

[As the video comes on, Raven is on the street, holding up a copy of a library book with a disgruntled expression. The precise book is a little blurry, but those with acute vision will see that it's this.]Not to sound like a librarian, but come on. Some of these books are really in bad shape. And really? Someone underlined "'I love balls', said

Comments

voice;

[hexyoutotuesday]

[Laughing. Just...laughing.]

voice;

[azarathmetrion]

What.

voice;

[hexyoutotuesday]

Do an online search for teabagging. Right now.

voice;

[azarathmetrion]

Wh...

[A very long pause.

In fact, she just maintains a stony silence.]

voice;

[hexyoutotuesday]

[Snickering.]

You probably grabbed a book that was required for some college intro class.

voice;

[azarathmetrion]

[After another long pause...]

I really pulled a Starfire here, huh.

voice;

[hexyoutotuesday]

We might as well put you in a belly shirt and hand you off to some Robin.

Don't worry. I won't hold this against you for too long.

voice;

[azarathmetrion]

I'm guessing you're going to be measuring "too long" in years.

voice;

[hexyoutotuesday]

Probably. I'm thinking I'll knock it off when you're old enough to drink in America.

Have you found a job yet?

voice;

[azarathmetrion]

[Sigh. But that's actually about as good as she could hope for. And the subject change is even better.]

I've just been doing odd jobs from place to place.

voice;

[hexyoutotuesday]

[She is so going to hate herself for this later.]

...you interested in being a waitress at a cabaret?

voice;

[azarathmetrion]

[...]

[And then:]

...

I guess it's not any more absurd than some of the things I've been doing.

Uh, but do you really think I could do something like that? I--don't really even know what that entails.

voice;

[hexyoutotuesday]

To say your social skills were lacking would be the understatement of the year, you're creepy, a downer, but you'd probably look better in fishnets than most of the girls applying. You're also less annoying than bimbos. Only slightly.

[She exhales with a groan.] You'd just be, like, walking around. Taking orders, giving people drinks and food, turning down everyone who hits on you...

voice;

[azarathmetrion]

Yeah, you're super charming, too. A real sweetheart.

[She pauses.]

...that doesn't sound too bad.

voice;

[hexyoutotuesday]

Aren't I? Taking pity on a poor, jobless teenage girl who would otherwise be fed to the wolves. I'm a real saint.

Good. Then you're hired. You'll start on the thirty-first. I'll take you out shopping beforehand and show you around the place.

voice;

[azarathmetrion]

[Eyeroll.] I'll be sure to nominate you to the canonization authorities.

...all right then. Well, thanks.

[Not that saying that doesn't still mildly rankle.]