♑ text.
WhAt'S uP aNd GoOd In ThIs ChIlLeSt Of MoThErFuCkIn HoOdS, y'AlL??
hOnK!
aLrIgHt, So ThIs DuDe ToLd ThIs JoKe At Me ThE oThEr DaY aNd I tHoUgHt, DaAaMn, I sHoUlD bE gETtInG tO sHaRe ThIs ShIt!
It'S fUcKiN hIlArIoUs, My BrOtHeRs AnD bItChEs. So SiT bAcK, cHiLl ThE fUcK oUt, AnD eNjOy wHiLe I kIcK tHiS hAhA iNtO mOtIoN.
JuSt LeT mE cRaCk OpEn A bOtTlE oF gRaPe FlAvOrEd MiRaClEs To GeT wArMeD Up.
Or CoOlEd Up, HaHaHa.
OkAy, So . . .
ThErE's ThIs ChIcA tHiNg cAlLeD a BlOnDe wHo'S zOoMiN aRoUnD iN tHiS pImPiN mOtHeRfUcKiN rIdE.
sHe'S jUsT cHiLlInG, cOnTrOlLiNg tHiS bItChTiTs BeAsT Of A fOuR wHeElEd VeHiClE aNd MaKiNg It FlY aLl OvEr ThE mOtHeRfUcKiN rOaD!!
bUt SeE, tHeRe WaS tHiS oThEr DuDe WoRkInG hIs ShIt WiTh *HiS* rIdE.
i ThInK iT's CaLlEd A cAr. Or A tRuCk. I fOrGoT.
BuT hE wAs ThErE, yEaH? aNd ShE aLl CuT rIgHt In FrOnT oF hIm.
MoThErFuCkEr AlMoSt GoT hUrT :o(
sO hE sTaRtS bReAkInG aLl HeR mOtHeRfUcKiN wInDoWs BuT sHe'S jUsT lAuGhInG sO fUcKiN hArD!
oH.
WaIt . . .
FuCk ThAt DoEsN't HaPpEn YeT.
hOlD uP . . . |
aIgHt sO hE aLmOsT gOt hUrT, aNd ThIs JuSt MaKeS hIm FeEl So FuCkIn SaLtY.
So ThEy BoTh StOp ThEiR sHiT aNd He GeTs OuT tO dRaW a CiRcLe On ThE gRoUnD.
aNd ThEn He'S aLl LiKe, "YoU gEt OuT oF tHeRe AnD cHiLl In ThIs MoThErFuCkIn PuNiShMeNt CiRcLe If YoU dOn'T wAnT sOmE tErRiBaD sHiT gOiNg AlL dOwN! >:o("
WhIlE sHe'S gEtTiNg HeR sTaNd On, He TaKeS tHiS kNiFe OuT oF FuCkIn NoWhErE aNd StArTs SlIcInG hEr SeAtS uP.
WhIcH aIn'T rEaLlY cOoL, bUt He'S dAmN sErIoUs HeRe.
NoW tHaT hE's CaLmInG hIs TiTs, He TuRnS aRoUnD, aNd ShE's KiNdA SmIlInG rEaL bIg.
ThIs JuSt GeTs To MaKe ThE mOtHeRfUcKeR sTaRt GeTtInG mAd AlL oVeR aGaIn.
LiKe, He'S fUmInG lEgIt FuMeS oF rAgE.
So He GoEs BaCk To HiS cAr AnD fInDs ThIs BaT.
rEaL mOtHeRfUcKiN cOnVEnIeNt . . . ( PsSt, It'S tHe MiRaClEs, Y'AlL :o) )
aNd He StArTs BrEaKiNg aLl HeR MoThErFuCkIn WiNdOwS bUt ShE'S jUsT lAuGhInG sO fUcKiN hArD!!
hE's GeTtInG hIs ExTrA rAgE fAcE oN nOw. He'S lIkE, sIsteR, yOu DoNe FlIpPeD mY aNgRiEsT pIsSeD tHe FuCk OfF sWiTcHeS, aNd I'm GoNnA gEt My HaRsH oN aBoUt It WiTh YoUr RiDe!!
ReMeMbEr ThE kNiFe He GoT bEfOrE? wElL, hE's GoNnA uSe It AgAiN.
pOpPiNg AlL tHe TiReS tHaT mAkEs ThAt FuCkEr RiDe SmOoTh, So It DoN't RiDe No MoRe.
At ThIs PoInT, mY fRiEnDs, ThIs SiStEr Is HaViNg A lAuGh AtTaCk SaNdWiCh sErVeD wItH cHuCkLeFuCk DiP oN tHe SiDe.
hErE cOmEs ThE mOtHeRfUcKiN pUnCh LiNe, So HoLd On To YoUr HoRnS . . .
oR yOuR uH . . . sTuFf If YoU dOn'T gOt No HoRnS.
sO oUr AnGrY mAiN DuDe GeTs AlL iN hEr fAcE aNd GoEs "WhAt'S sO mOtHeRfUcKiN fUnNy SiS?! tHiS sHiT iS sErIoUs AnD i'M sO aLl MeAnInG iT!!"
hAhAhA, fUuUuCk MaN i'M gEtTiNg AlL cHuCkLy HeRe ToO.
sO aNyWaY, sHe FrOnTs ThIs PiEcE oF nOiSe RiGhT aT hIm:
"BrOtHeR, eVeRy TImE yOu WeReN't LoOkInG, i StEpPeD oUt Of ThAt WIcKeD pUnIsHmEnT cIrClE yOu AlL tOlD mE tO sTaY iN!"
hOnK hOnK hOnK hOnK hOnK hOnK hOnK hOnK hOnK hOnK
:o)
what's up and good in this chillest of motherfuckin hoods, y'all??
honk!
alright, so this dude told this joke at me the other day and i thought, daaamn, i should be getting to share this shit!
it's fuckin hilarious, my brothers and bitches. so sit back, chill the fuck out, and enjoy while i kick this haha into motion.
just let me crack open a bottle of grape flavored miracles to get warmed up.
or cooled up, hahaha.
okay, so . . .
there's this chica thing called a blonde who's zoomin around in this pimpin motherfuckin ride.
she's just chilling, controlling this bitchtits beast of a four wheeled vehicle and making it fly all over the motherfuckin road!!
but see, there was this other dude working his shit with *his* ride.
i think it's called a car. or a truck. i forgot.
but he was there, yeah? and she all cut right in front of him.
motherfucker almost got hurt :o(
so he starts breaking all her motherfuckin windows but she's just laughing so fuckin hard!
oh.
wait . . .
fuck that doesn't happen yet.
hold up . . . |
aight so he almost got hurt, and this just makes him feel so fuckin salty.
so they both stop their shit and he gets out to draw a circle on the ground.
and then he's all like, "you get out of there and chill in this motherfuckin punishment circle if you don't want some terribad shit going all down! >:o("
while she's getting her stand on, he takes this knife out of fuckin nowhere and starts slicing her seats up.
which ain't really cool, but he's damn serious here.
now that he's calming his tits, he turns around, and she's kinda smiling real big.
this just gets to make the motherfucker start getting mad all over again.
like, he's fuming legit fumes of rage.
so he goes back to his car and finds this bat.
real motherfuckin convenient . . . ( psst, it's the miracles, y'all :o) )
and he starts breaking all her motherfuckin windows but she's just laughing so fuckin hard!!
he's getting his extra rage face on now. he's like, sister, you done flipped my angriest pissed the fuck off switches, and i'm gonna get my harsh on about it with your ride!!
remember the knife he got before? well, he's gonna use it again.
popping all the tires that makes that fucker ride smooth, so it don't ride no more.
at this point, my friends, this sister is having a laugh attack sandwich served with chucklefuck dip on the side.
here comes the motherfuckin punch line, so hold on to your horns . . .
or your uh . . . stuff if you don't got no horns.
so our angry main dude gets all in her face and goes "what's so motherfuckin funny sis?! this shit is serious and i'm so all meaning it!!"
hahaha, fuuuuck man i'm getting all chuckly here too.
so anyway, she fronts this piece of noise right at him:
"brother, every time you weren't looking, i stepped out of that wicked punishment circle you all told me to stay in!"
honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk
:o)
( ooc: text permissions post here! )
hOnK!
aLrIgHt, So ThIs DuDe ToLd ThIs JoKe At Me ThE oThEr DaY aNd I tHoUgHt, DaAaMn, I sHoUlD bE gETtInG tO sHaRe ThIs ShIt!
It'S fUcKiN hIlArIoUs, My BrOtHeRs AnD bItChEs. So SiT bAcK, cHiLl ThE fUcK oUt, AnD eNjOy wHiLe I kIcK tHiS hAhA iNtO mOtIoN.
JuSt LeT mE cRaCk OpEn A bOtTlE oF gRaPe FlAvOrEd MiRaClEs To GeT wArMeD Up.
Or CoOlEd Up, HaHaHa.
OkAy, So . . .
ThErE's ThIs ChIcA tHiNg cAlLeD a BlOnDe wHo'S zOoMiN aRoUnD iN tHiS pImPiN mOtHeRfUcKiN rIdE.
sHe'S jUsT cHiLlInG, cOnTrOlLiNg tHiS bItChTiTs BeAsT Of A fOuR wHeElEd VeHiClE aNd MaKiNg It FlY aLl OvEr ThE mOtHeRfUcKiN rOaD!!
bUt SeE, tHeRe WaS tHiS oThEr DuDe WoRkInG hIs ShIt WiTh *HiS* rIdE.
i ThInK iT's CaLlEd A cAr. Or A tRuCk. I fOrGoT.
BuT hE wAs ThErE, yEaH? aNd ShE aLl CuT rIgHt In FrOnT oF hIm.
MoThErFuCkEr AlMoSt GoT hUrT :o(
sO hE sTaRtS bReAkInG aLl HeR mOtHeRfUcKiN wInDoWs BuT sHe'S jUsT lAuGhInG sO fUcKiN hArD!
oH.
WaIt . . .
FuCk ThAt DoEsN't HaPpEn YeT.
hOlD uP . . . |
aIgHt sO hE aLmOsT gOt hUrT, aNd ThIs JuSt MaKeS hIm FeEl So FuCkIn SaLtY.
So ThEy BoTh StOp ThEiR sHiT aNd He GeTs OuT tO dRaW a CiRcLe On ThE gRoUnD.
aNd ThEn He'S aLl LiKe, "YoU gEt OuT oF tHeRe AnD cHiLl In ThIs MoThErFuCkIn PuNiShMeNt CiRcLe If YoU dOn'T wAnT sOmE tErRiBaD sHiT gOiNg AlL dOwN! >:o("
WhIlE sHe'S gEtTiNg HeR sTaNd On, He TaKeS tHiS kNiFe OuT oF FuCkIn NoWhErE aNd StArTs SlIcInG hEr SeAtS uP.
WhIcH aIn'T rEaLlY cOoL, bUt He'S dAmN sErIoUs HeRe.
NoW tHaT hE's CaLmInG hIs TiTs, He TuRnS aRoUnD, aNd ShE's KiNdA SmIlInG rEaL bIg.
ThIs JuSt GeTs To MaKe ThE mOtHeRfUcKeR sTaRt GeTtInG mAd AlL oVeR aGaIn.
LiKe, He'S fUmInG lEgIt FuMeS oF rAgE.
So He GoEs BaCk To HiS cAr AnD fInDs ThIs BaT.
rEaL mOtHeRfUcKiN cOnVEnIeNt . . . ( PsSt, It'S tHe MiRaClEs, Y'AlL :o) )
aNd He StArTs BrEaKiNg aLl HeR MoThErFuCkIn WiNdOwS bUt ShE'S jUsT lAuGhInG sO fUcKiN hArD!!
hE's GeTtInG hIs ExTrA rAgE fAcE oN nOw. He'S lIkE, sIsteR, yOu DoNe FlIpPeD mY aNgRiEsT pIsSeD tHe FuCk OfF sWiTcHeS, aNd I'm GoNnA gEt My HaRsH oN aBoUt It WiTh YoUr RiDe!!
ReMeMbEr ThE kNiFe He GoT bEfOrE? wElL, hE's GoNnA uSe It AgAiN.
pOpPiNg AlL tHe TiReS tHaT mAkEs ThAt FuCkEr RiDe SmOoTh, So It DoN't RiDe No MoRe.
At ThIs PoInT, mY fRiEnDs, ThIs SiStEr Is HaViNg A lAuGh AtTaCk SaNdWiCh sErVeD wItH cHuCkLeFuCk DiP oN tHe SiDe.
hErE cOmEs ThE mOtHeRfUcKiN pUnCh LiNe, So HoLd On To YoUr HoRnS . . .
oR yOuR uH . . . sTuFf If YoU dOn'T gOt No HoRnS.
sO oUr AnGrY mAiN DuDe GeTs AlL iN hEr fAcE aNd GoEs "WhAt'S sO mOtHeRfUcKiN fUnNy SiS?! tHiS sHiT iS sErIoUs AnD i'M sO aLl MeAnInG iT!!"
hAhAhA, fUuUuCk MaN i'M gEtTiNg AlL cHuCkLy HeRe ToO.
sO aNyWaY, sHe FrOnTs ThIs PiEcE oF nOiSe RiGhT aT hIm:
"BrOtHeR, eVeRy TImE yOu WeReN't LoOkInG, i StEpPeD oUt Of ThAt WIcKeD pUnIsHmEnT cIrClE yOu AlL tOlD mE tO sTaY iN!"
hOnK hOnK hOnK hOnK hOnK hOnK hOnK hOnK hOnK hOnK
:o)
what's up and good in this chillest of motherfuckin hoods, y'all??
honk!
alright, so this dude told this joke at me the other day and i thought, daaamn, i should be getting to share this shit!
it's fuckin hilarious, my brothers and bitches. so sit back, chill the fuck out, and enjoy while i kick this haha into motion.
just let me crack open a bottle of grape flavored miracles to get warmed up.
or cooled up, hahaha.
okay, so . . .
there's this chica thing called a blonde who's zoomin around in this pimpin motherfuckin ride.
she's just chilling, controlling this bitchtits beast of a four wheeled vehicle and making it fly all over the motherfuckin road!!
but see, there was this other dude working his shit with *his* ride.
i think it's called a car. or a truck. i forgot.
but he was there, yeah? and she all cut right in front of him.
motherfucker almost got hurt :o(
so he starts breaking all her motherfuckin windows but she's just laughing so fuckin hard!
oh.
wait . . .
fuck that doesn't happen yet.
hold up . . . |
aight so he almost got hurt, and this just makes him feel so fuckin salty.
so they both stop their shit and he gets out to draw a circle on the ground.
and then he's all like, "you get out of there and chill in this motherfuckin punishment circle if you don't want some terribad shit going all down! >:o("
while she's getting her stand on, he takes this knife out of fuckin nowhere and starts slicing her seats up.
which ain't really cool, but he's damn serious here.
now that he's calming his tits, he turns around, and she's kinda smiling real big.
this just gets to make the motherfucker start getting mad all over again.
like, he's fuming legit fumes of rage.
so he goes back to his car and finds this bat.
real motherfuckin convenient . . . ( psst, it's the miracles, y'all :o) )
and he starts breaking all her motherfuckin windows but she's just laughing so fuckin hard!!
he's getting his extra rage face on now. he's like, sister, you done flipped my angriest pissed the fuck off switches, and i'm gonna get my harsh on about it with your ride!!
remember the knife he got before? well, he's gonna use it again.
popping all the tires that makes that fucker ride smooth, so it don't ride no more.
at this point, my friends, this sister is having a laugh attack sandwich served with chucklefuck dip on the side.
here comes the motherfuckin punch line, so hold on to your horns . . .
or your uh . . . stuff if you don't got no horns.
so our angry main dude gets all in her face and goes "what's so motherfuckin funny sis?! this shit is serious and i'm so all meaning it!!"
hahaha, fuuuuck man i'm getting all chuckly here too.
so anyway, she fronts this piece of noise right at him:
"brother, every time you weren't looking, i stepped out of that wicked punishment circle you all told me to stay in!"
honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk
:o)
( ooc: text permissions post here! )