[video]

[atrumcanis]

[The video feed shows-- for those who know it-- the living room of the Super Secret Firehouse. It's empty for the moment, but one can hear muffled yips in the background. Jack's voice is first.]

Attention, Newcomers of Siren's Port! I think there's a goddman epidemic goin' on here! First Jinx, and now--

Stoppit, hold-- [It's a mutter at first,

Comments

video.

[troparion]

Second time, and still nobody's gotten married! I gotta say, I'm ashamed of this community.

video.

[cowboy_newsie]

I don't think we can, actually.

video. herp derp, really just 1/1.

[troparion]

What, too expensive?

video.

[cowboy_newsie]

Yup. That's exactly it.

video.

[troparion]

- That ain't a problem! I'll cut a deal for you two, if you'd like.

video.

[cowboy_newsie]

. . . are you a priest?

video.

[troparion]

Yup. Father Nicholas D. Wolfwood, at your service.

You fellows are gonna have a service, yeah?

video.

[cowboy_newsie]

I don't think the church is too big on two guys gettin' hitched, Father.

video.

[troparion]

Pretty sure a fella can't get pregnant, either, so today's the day for breaking norms, ain't it?

Anyway, I don't judge.

video.

[cowboy_newsie]

Nicest priest I ever met. [A pause.] No offense.

video.

[troparion]

Aw, c'mon. Flattering won't be getting you an even lower price. I gotta eat, too.

Re: video.

[cowboy_newsie]

I ain't even proposed, I can't think o' that sorta stuff yet.

video.

[troparion]

Little bit late for thinking about it, isn't it?

[a beat.]

And no offense taken, but I can't believe the other guys you met were that bad. Dunno what church you were talking about, either; my world, it'd be crazy to think anyone would care about technical details like that.

video.

[cowboy_newsie]

You're Catholic, yeah? Jesus, Mary, Holy Ghost, all that?

video.

[troparion]

... Sure. Why?

video.

[cowboy_newsie]

Just makin' sure we're talkin' about the same Church and all. The one who, y'know, hates everyone for everythin'.