Life and other Four-Letter Words
Meme stolen from missymeggins.
I am:
Happy. Sad. A good friend. Adventurous. Shy. Confident. Procrastinating. A male. Bored. Anxious. Clumsy. Sociable. Always punctual. Selfish. Intelligent. Funny. A female. Sarcastic. Insecure. Sick. Beautiful. Articulate. Loud. Kind. Even tempered. Honest. Short. Tall. Medium height. Proud of myself. Loving. Witty. Down to earth. Outspoken. Determined. High-maintenance. Pretty. Assertive. Organized. Selfless.
I have:
Brown hair. Brown Eyes. Blue Eyes. Curly hair. Long fingernails. Braces. Chipped nail polish. Long legs. Straight hair. A side-fringe. Long eyelashes. Sore feet. Freckles. Dark skin. Medium skin. Green eyes. Blonde hair. Dyed hair. Short legs. Red hair. Big boobs. Rosy cheeks. Wavy hair. Black hair. Small-ish waist. Tattoos. Piercings. Big ears. Short hair.
I love:
Flowers. Kisses. Summer. Coffee. The rain. Candles. Incense. Late night talk shows. Insects. Hugs. Attention. The beach. Chocolate. Music. Beanies. Harry Potter. Twilight. Facebook. Black and white photos. Sleeping in. Driving. Narrating my pet's thoughts. Opening gifts. Buying gifts. Halloween. Cute texts. Apples. Compliments. Country music. Hip hop. Sushi. Sports. Art. Singing. Seeing my loved ones happy. Surprises. Sunsets and sunrises. Skinny dipping. Horror movies. Simon Cowell. Family Guy. Garlic. Hearing somebody talk in their sleep. Being right. KFC. Abstract photography. Concerts and festivals. Tanning. Oversized t-shirts.
I would love to be a:
Police officer. Lawyer. Doctor. Teacher. Fruit picker. Mother. Greenpeace volunteer. Hippie. Groupie. Rockstar. Footballer's wife. Therapist. Singer. Actress. Diving instructor. Lottery winner. Company owner. Housewife. Nurse. Builder. Race car driver. Website developer. An inspirational talker. Music teacher. Artist. Chef. Makeup artist. Hairdresser. Restaurant owner. Homeless shelter volunteer. Fitness trainer. Vet. Radio show host. Band manager.
I like to eat:
Fruit. Vegetables. Fast food. Sushi. In bed. Rice. Sandwiches. Subway. Chicken. Cakes. Seafood. A lot. Pasta. Rice crackers. When I'm bored. Cheese. Ice cream. Garlic bread. Peanut butter out of the jar. Eggs. Lots of ethnic foods. Pancakes. Honey. Lunch. Bread crusts. Low calorie foods. Soy products. Gluten free products. Only when I'm hungry. Toast. Breakfast. Pizza. Noodles.
I dislike:
Cold mornings. Baths. People dissing my taste in music. People in front of me walking really slowly. Having my personal space invaded. Cleaning. Going to bed early. Wine/beer. Religion arguments. Coffee. The beach. Rain. Children. Having my photo taken. Drama. Gossiping. Hip hop. Cooking shows. Drugs. Cats. People singing happy birthday to me. Selfish people. Social networking sites. Swimming. Snow. Eminem. Seafood. One word text messages. Awkward silences. Alarm clocks. Hypocrites.
Life's been a mess lately. There's tons and tons of endless stuff to do that just keeps coming no matter how much I get done. A student here at college committed suicide a couple of weeks ago, and the campus is still recovering. My cousin just died of a horrible alcohol-related car accident; she came out with awful injuries and brain damage, and my family pulled the plug. I'm trying to juggle abandonment issues of being ditched by one of my best friends. I'm constantly terrified by the reality of the situation of med schools, and it keeps hitting me that there's a very real chance of me not getting into med school at all and having to find a new career.
Oh, and a giant spider just crawled on my arm and I nearly had a heart attack.
Yeah, life is awesome.
To be fair, there are good things, too. I got into Sigma Delta Pi, the Hispanic Studies honor society. My sister's getting married (though that kind of contributes to the "endless stuff to do" part above) to a guy she loves and I think is awesome. And I'm studying abroad for the summer in a few weeks. That's the one I keep telling myself to keep focused.
I realize whenever I complain about things going wrong, though, that I'm in such a position of comfort to start off with. Whatever massive things happen that dump me down however many hundred levels of happy, I have to be grateful for what I have. It's hard sometimes, but I don't want to be that whiny upper-middle-class white brat that can't appreciate what they've already been given. I've met that kid and sometimes I've been that kid, and it's not a good thing to be. I dunno. It's really hard for me to strike an honest balance about actually handling bad things in my life, trying to avoid both becoming a maudlin, ungrateful twat and becoming someone who feels like they can't mourn or process sadness without being guilty about it.
I dunno. I think it would be different if it weren't for the fact that my safety net has been remarkably... unsafe lately. Most of the people I turn to are ones I can't do that to right now. That best friend that's dumping me is one that I'm so used to having around and talking to about everything. My roommate's been gone for the whole semester, studying in Italy (which is awesome for her - I don't begrudge her that at all - but is kind of lonely for me.) And one of my other best friends knew the student who committed suicide really well, and I don't want to unload all of this on her. We're kind of acting as crutches for each other right now, and I don't think either of us want to be the one that puts on the straw that breaks the camel's back.
Gosh, this sounds so ridiculously emo. I don't mean it to. This isn't some long-winded plea for help or anything. Promise.
I like these two...
You will weep no more. How gracious he will be when you cry for help! As soon as he hears, he will answer you. Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them. Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying 'This is the way; walk in it.' - Isaiah 30:19-21
In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith - of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire - may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory, and honor, when Jesus Christ is revealed. - 1 Peter 1:6-7
I am:
Happy. Sad. A good friend. Adventurous. Shy. Confident. Procrastinating. A male. Bored. Anxious. Clumsy. Sociable. Always punctual. Selfish. Intelligent. Funny. A female. Sarcastic. Insecure. Sick. Beautiful. Articulate. Loud. Kind. Even tempered. Honest. Short. Tall. Medium height. Proud of myself. Loving. Witty. Down to earth. Outspoken. Determined. High-maintenance. Pretty. Assertive. Organized. Selfless.
I have:
Brown hair. Brown Eyes. Blue Eyes. Curly hair. Long fingernails. Braces. Chipped nail polish. Long legs. Straight hair. A side-fringe. Long eyelashes. Sore feet. Freckles. Dark skin. Medium skin. Green eyes. Blonde hair. Dyed hair. Short legs. Red hair. Big boobs. Rosy cheeks. Wavy hair. Black hair. Small-ish waist. Tattoos. Piercings. Big ears. Short hair.
I love:
Flowers. Kisses. Summer. Coffee. The rain. Candles. Incense. Late night talk shows. Insects. Hugs. Attention. The beach. Chocolate. Music. Beanies. Harry Potter. Twilight. Facebook. Black and white photos. Sleeping in. Driving. Narrating my pet's thoughts. Opening gifts. Buying gifts. Halloween. Cute texts. Apples. Compliments. Country music. Hip hop. Sushi. Sports. Art. Singing. Seeing my loved ones happy. Surprises. Sunsets and sunrises. Skinny dipping. Horror movies. Simon Cowell. Family Guy. Garlic. Hearing somebody talk in their sleep. Being right. KFC. Abstract photography. Concerts and festivals. Tanning. Oversized t-shirts.
I would love to be a:
Police officer. Lawyer. Doctor. Teacher. Fruit picker. Mother. Greenpeace volunteer. Hippie. Groupie. Rockstar. Footballer's wife. Therapist. Singer. Actress. Diving instructor. Lottery winner. Company owner. Housewife. Nurse. Builder. Race car driver. Website developer. An inspirational talker. Music teacher. Artist. Chef. Makeup artist. Hairdresser. Restaurant owner. Homeless shelter volunteer. Fitness trainer. Vet. Radio show host. Band manager.
I like to eat:
Fruit. Vegetables. Fast food. Sushi. In bed. Rice. Sandwiches. Subway. Chicken. Cakes. Seafood. A lot. Pasta. Rice crackers. When I'm bored. Cheese. Ice cream. Garlic bread. Peanut butter out of the jar. Eggs. Lots of ethnic foods. Pancakes. Honey. Lunch. Bread crusts. Low calorie foods. Soy products. Gluten free products. Only when I'm hungry. Toast. Breakfast. Pizza. Noodles.
I dislike:
Cold mornings. Baths. People dissing my taste in music. People in front of me walking really slowly. Having my personal space invaded. Cleaning. Going to bed early. Wine/beer. Religion arguments. Coffee. The beach. Rain. Children. Having my photo taken. Drama. Gossiping. Hip hop. Cooking shows. Drugs. Cats. People singing happy birthday to me. Selfish people. Social networking sites. Swimming. Snow. Eminem. Seafood. One word text messages. Awkward silences. Alarm clocks. Hypocrites.
Life's been a mess lately. There's tons and tons of endless stuff to do that just keeps coming no matter how much I get done. A student here at college committed suicide a couple of weeks ago, and the campus is still recovering. My cousin just died of a horrible alcohol-related car accident; she came out with awful injuries and brain damage, and my family pulled the plug. I'm trying to juggle abandonment issues of being ditched by one of my best friends. I'm constantly terrified by the reality of the situation of med schools, and it keeps hitting me that there's a very real chance of me not getting into med school at all and having to find a new career.
Oh, and a giant spider just crawled on my arm and I nearly had a heart attack.
Yeah, life is awesome.
To be fair, there are good things, too. I got into Sigma Delta Pi, the Hispanic Studies honor society. My sister's getting married (though that kind of contributes to the "endless stuff to do" part above) to a guy she loves and I think is awesome. And I'm studying abroad for the summer in a few weeks. That's the one I keep telling myself to keep focused.
I realize whenever I complain about things going wrong, though, that I'm in such a position of comfort to start off with. Whatever massive things happen that dump me down however many hundred levels of happy, I have to be grateful for what I have. It's hard sometimes, but I don't want to be that whiny upper-middle-class white brat that can't appreciate what they've already been given. I've met that kid and sometimes I've been that kid, and it's not a good thing to be. I dunno. It's really hard for me to strike an honest balance about actually handling bad things in my life, trying to avoid both becoming a maudlin, ungrateful twat and becoming someone who feels like they can't mourn or process sadness without being guilty about it.
I dunno. I think it would be different if it weren't for the fact that my safety net has been remarkably... unsafe lately. Most of the people I turn to are ones I can't do that to right now. That best friend that's dumping me is one that I'm so used to having around and talking to about everything. My roommate's been gone for the whole semester, studying in Italy (which is awesome for her - I don't begrudge her that at all - but is kind of lonely for me.) And one of my other best friends knew the student who committed suicide really well, and I don't want to unload all of this on her. We're kind of acting as crutches for each other right now, and I don't think either of us want to be the one that puts on the straw that breaks the camel's back.
Gosh, this sounds so ridiculously emo. I don't mean it to. This isn't some long-winded plea for help or anything. Promise.
I like these two...
You will weep no more. How gracious he will be when you cry for help! As soon as he hears, he will answer you. Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them. Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying 'This is the way; walk in it.' - Isaiah 30:19-21
In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith - of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire - may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory, and honor, when Jesus Christ is revealed. - 1 Peter 1:6-7