New beginings
Ok I have decided its time to stop messing around and actually knuckled down and get myself sorted. I won’t go into the reasons for this; there was no epiphany, no seeing the light on the road to Damascus, nothing like that. But its something that has been nagging at me, and enough is enough.
I’m 26 now, and I'm really not getting anything out of my life, I am capable of so much more and I've been lazy and just drifted along being immature and childish, not taking responsibilities for my actions. I do annoy myself at times, well most the time. In many ways I am blessed. I have the unique ability to see things so incredibly deeply and get such immense pleasure from the most trivial matters, however I am an artistic dreamer who is ruled by emotion.
On my day I know no one can beat me, I have a lot of ability and insight, however I am also plagued by self-doubt and periods where my confidence just crumbles. No one can get the better of me, but I can, and often do, bring around my own downfall. I am at the stage now where it is possible to actually achieve some of what I am capable of in life and fulfil my abilities and to get what I want. My life can be so rich, I have a partner who will be there for me and look after me when I need it, when my confidence dips, a partner who will be my foundation as I press on. It’s now all down to me now, to stand up and stop being so passive, to be the person I can be and not waste my soul. I am already haunted by my past; I don’t want to be haunted by any other era of my life.
I could be the catalyst that sparks the revolution
I could be an inmate in a long-term institution
I could dream to wide extremes, I could do or die
I could yawn and be withdrawn and watch the world go by
What a waste, what a waste, what a waste….
Its time for me to focus now, and not to just go for the superficial, easy, shallow path of least resistance.
I don’t want to die wondering.
I’m 26 now, and I'm really not getting anything out of my life, I am capable of so much more and I've been lazy and just drifted along being immature and childish, not taking responsibilities for my actions. I do annoy myself at times, well most the time. In many ways I am blessed. I have the unique ability to see things so incredibly deeply and get such immense pleasure from the most trivial matters, however I am an artistic dreamer who is ruled by emotion.
On my day I know no one can beat me, I have a lot of ability and insight, however I am also plagued by self-doubt and periods where my confidence just crumbles. No one can get the better of me, but I can, and often do, bring around my own downfall. I am at the stage now where it is possible to actually achieve some of what I am capable of in life and fulfil my abilities and to get what I want. My life can be so rich, I have a partner who will be there for me and look after me when I need it, when my confidence dips, a partner who will be my foundation as I press on. It’s now all down to me now, to stand up and stop being so passive, to be the person I can be and not waste my soul. I am already haunted by my past; I don’t want to be haunted by any other era of my life.
I could be the catalyst that sparks the revolution
I could be an inmate in a long-term institution
I could dream to wide extremes, I could do or die
I could yawn and be withdrawn and watch the world go by
What a waste, what a waste, what a waste….
Its time for me to focus now, and not to just go for the superficial, easy, shallow path of least resistance.
I don’t want to die wondering.