LOVE The Wet Spots... here's some lyrics to prove it!
From the Wet Spots... I love this song.
PSA (the lyrics)
HER:
Honey if like us you linger
Around your backside with a finger
And... stimulate your prostate, just for fun,
HIM:
It's natural to fantasize
About a toy of larger size
And by all means friend, go out and purchase one.
HER:
But should your prude-ish-ness preempt it
Then you may be sorely tempted
To improvise with what you have on hand
TOGETHER:
I know it seems a perfect fit
We advise you - wait a bit
Listen to this song and you will understand...
HER:
Never put a fish in your bum, chum.
Not even one tiny little fishstick in your bum.
Never put a fish in your hole, Joel.
That frozen snapper's gonna be too cold.
HIM:
It'll give you an erection but it's sure to cause infection.
TOGETHER:
So never never never never never never never never put a fish in your bum.
HER:
Never put a vacuum in your bum chum.
Never put that shiny 10-foot hose in your bum.
HIM:
(And don't put it on your cock either.)
HER:
Never put a vacuum in your crack, Jack.
There's better ways to tidy up 'round back.
HIM:
I'll bet you one hundred fifty bucks that the experience is really gonna suck.
TOGETHER:
So never never never never never never never never put a vacuum in your bum.
HER:
Never put a cell phone in your bum, mum.
That's just a general rule of thumb.
Never put a cell phone in your ass,
HIM:
Cass.
HER
Aint no reception up your (?) pass
The radiation causes serilization and eventual loss of all sensation.
TOGETHER:
So never never never never never never never never put a cell phone in your bum.
HER:
Never put a bowling ball up your ass.
HIM:
(That's just crass!)
HER:
That mother's never goinna pass
Don't roll that big thing up your lane, Jane
Have you gone totally insane?
HIM:
Although it's safer than a trout,
It can be hard to get the damned thing out.
TOGETHER:
So never never never never never never never never put a bowling ball into your bum.
[Spoken...
HER:
Folks, folks the Wet Spots... the Wet Spots care about your buns
HIM:
We love your buns.
HER:
And every year thousands of people are hospitalized because they made - bad anal choices.
HIM:
That's right honey.
HER:
And we want you to know that you can save yourself a trip to the emergency room
if you just make a short detour to the toy store and buy yourself a quality silicon butt plug.
HIM:
I hear women's wear is nice...
HER:
Not that kind of plug, honey...
But you should know never to buy a novelty toy because novelties are meant to be kept on your knick knack shelf, beside your fake vomit and your whoopie cushion.
if it's a novelty it might be made out of softened PVC which is a material so toxic that Health Canada banned its use for dog toys
HIM:
(howling)
HER:
So buy silicon folks and remember - your ass, is not a joke.]
TOGETHER:
If you accept these tips in your pursuit of anal kicks,
You're sure to have a lotta good clean fun.
Your going to have a ball.
Just relax and start out small.
And don't forget to wash it when you're done!
HER:
Shoo be doo be doo be doo doo-whah!
PSA (the lyrics)
HER:
Honey if like us you linger
Around your backside with a finger
And... stimulate your prostate, just for fun,
HIM:
It's natural to fantasize
About a toy of larger size
And by all means friend, go out and purchase one.
HER:
But should your prude-ish-ness preempt it
Then you may be sorely tempted
To improvise with what you have on hand
TOGETHER:
I know it seems a perfect fit
We advise you - wait a bit
Listen to this song and you will understand...
HER:
Never put a fish in your bum, chum.
Not even one tiny little fishstick in your bum.
Never put a fish in your hole, Joel.
That frozen snapper's gonna be too cold.
HIM:
It'll give you an erection but it's sure to cause infection.
TOGETHER:
So never never never never never never never never put a fish in your bum.
HER:
Never put a vacuum in your bum chum.
Never put that shiny 10-foot hose in your bum.
HIM:
(And don't put it on your cock either.)
HER:
Never put a vacuum in your crack, Jack.
There's better ways to tidy up 'round back.
HIM:
I'll bet you one hundred fifty bucks that the experience is really gonna suck.
TOGETHER:
So never never never never never never never never put a vacuum in your bum.
HER:
Never put a cell phone in your bum, mum.
That's just a general rule of thumb.
Never put a cell phone in your ass,
HIM:
Cass.
HER
Aint no reception up your (?) pass
The radiation causes serilization and eventual loss of all sensation.
TOGETHER:
So never never never never never never never never put a cell phone in your bum.
HER:
Never put a bowling ball up your ass.
HIM:
(That's just crass!)
HER:
That mother's never goinna pass
Don't roll that big thing up your lane, Jane
Have you gone totally insane?
HIM:
Although it's safer than a trout,
It can be hard to get the damned thing out.
TOGETHER:
So never never never never never never never never put a bowling ball into your bum.
[Spoken...
HER:
Folks, folks the Wet Spots... the Wet Spots care about your buns
HIM:
We love your buns.
HER:
And every year thousands of people are hospitalized because they made - bad anal choices.
HIM:
That's right honey.
HER:
And we want you to know that you can save yourself a trip to the emergency room
if you just make a short detour to the toy store and buy yourself a quality silicon butt plug.
HIM:
I hear women's wear is nice...
HER:
Not that kind of plug, honey...
But you should know never to buy a novelty toy because novelties are meant to be kept on your knick knack shelf, beside your fake vomit and your whoopie cushion.
if it's a novelty it might be made out of softened PVC which is a material so toxic that Health Canada banned its use for dog toys
HIM:
(howling)
HER:
So buy silicon folks and remember - your ass, is not a joke.]
TOGETHER:
If you accept these tips in your pursuit of anal kicks,
You're sure to have a lotta good clean fun.
Your going to have a ball.
Just relax and start out small.
And don't forget to wash it when you're done!
HER:
Shoo be doo be doo be doo doo-whah!