Dream
I was at a grocery store and looking for something specific. I kept circling the produce section, scanning for what I THOUGHT was and should be there and could not find it. Then, I noticed I didn't even know what I was looking for, but I kept circling. Noticed that others were noticing how long I was spending and I hadn't even gone to the other sections of the store yet. I started to be aware of time and the pressure of having to be at a company picnic and that I was the person coordinating it and I hadn't even delegated games or anything. I hadn't communicated specifics and yet knew all these people, including my boss and bosses above would be there.
I finally stopped circling and dashed through the rest of the store putting in more traditional fast foods in bags and boxes with sodas because I knew everyone would consume those things.
I was checking out and saw my old boss in the parking lot. He came in as I was finishing and helped me put the bags in his car since he was going over to the park and asked me to stop at this young secretary's house to get her on the way. I felt relief that he had the food and that at least it would get there on time.
I went to the young woman's home which was a very nice apartment not far from the park. She was in a panic and running late. Apparently, she had volunteered to put together a game booth and I was freaked because I didn't make other plans for games. But she was more freaked, so I talked with her, listening to her, helping her focus and calm down. We ended up painting some walls of the booth. I tried to paint a dog. I remember starting with the eyes and dark black and brown, but drew in the little reflected light pools and went for yellow and red. I tried to paint in long strokes with a sort of dry-brush technique to get thin little "hairlike" motions and to paint up the ears... but it was looking more like a blobbish bear and not a dog. The energy with me and the young woman was quiet and focused and at that moment, my only concern was problem-solving the matter of painting a dog so it looked like a dog and not a rabid bear...
Then I heard noises outside and looked up out her window to see a lot of people from BOBJ-SJ engineering group going across the lawn toward the park. I saw them carrying food and game stuff. I then saw a tractor thing pulling a long set of built game booths and felt mixed relief that others were taking care of things and fear that I would be judged as a slacker or as incompetent or something bad for not orchestrating things better.
I noticed I felt safe in the woman's home and just wanted to keep painting. However, even with the window open, it still felt kind of dark and cavelike there and it was warm and bright outside. I wanted both. And I didn't want to feel attacked or judged.
I heard some noise outside
I finally stopped circling and dashed through the rest of the store putting in more traditional fast foods in bags and boxes with sodas because I knew everyone would consume those things.
I was checking out and saw my old boss in the parking lot. He came in as I was finishing and helped me put the bags in his car since he was going over to the park and asked me to stop at this young secretary's house to get her on the way. I felt relief that he had the food and that at least it would get there on time.
I went to the young woman's home which was a very nice apartment not far from the park. She was in a panic and running late. Apparently, she had volunteered to put together a game booth and I was freaked because I didn't make other plans for games. But she was more freaked, so I talked with her, listening to her, helping her focus and calm down. We ended up painting some walls of the booth. I tried to paint a dog. I remember starting with the eyes and dark black and brown, but drew in the little reflected light pools and went for yellow and red. I tried to paint in long strokes with a sort of dry-brush technique to get thin little "hairlike" motions and to paint up the ears... but it was looking more like a blobbish bear and not a dog. The energy with me and the young woman was quiet and focused and at that moment, my only concern was problem-solving the matter of painting a dog so it looked like a dog and not a rabid bear...
Then I heard noises outside and looked up out her window to see a lot of people from BOBJ-SJ engineering group going across the lawn toward the park. I saw them carrying food and game stuff. I then saw a tractor thing pulling a long set of built game booths and felt mixed relief that others were taking care of things and fear that I would be judged as a slacker or as incompetent or something bad for not orchestrating things better.
I noticed I felt safe in the woman's home and just wanted to keep painting. However, even with the window open, it still felt kind of dark and cavelike there and it was warm and bright outside. I wanted both. And I didn't want to feel attacked or judged.
I heard some noise outside