And now for something completely different
Alex and I just finished watching the new Battlestar Galactica....I think. I have no idea what I watched and I'm starting to think the paint fumes and stress from work created a fever dream while watching some American version of Evangelion.
What did I just watch?
Why is everyone an idiot? Why is the president acting like Janeway? Have none of them played The Sims or Civilization?
Why is Gaius Baltar the only one who knows basic astronomy? Why not just pick a life bearing planet and hide there? Why not stay on Kobol or the algae planet? Why was there the exact same algae on that planet? Where was it growing, tiny underground puddles?
Why has no one tried to get the arrow to Kobol before the cyclon attack? Was no one interested in the prophecies until they were all doomed? Why would the constellations be the same after thousands of years?
Why did they settle in Vancouver and not spread out in New Caprica? Why didn't they have penicillin? Were they too dumb to make bread to get moldy? If Baltar knew about farming, why wasn't there any?
What the hell is Starbuck (other than a raging bitch resembling a drunk Bella Swan)? why did she fly into, a plothole?
Why are there chords on their phones and record players? Are there phone lines in the ship? Is one of the ships int he fleet a satellite purely fro communications? How can they call ships without it? Is it God doing that, as well as putting sound in space?
Are the humanoid cyclons really machines? They interact with organic ships and vats of KY jelly pretty well and can bleed to death.
What was the opera house about? Why was everyone hallucinating the same thing? What was the crap about Baltar being important when he spent longer giving a random speech than helping the kid?
If they spent years learning the importance of freewill, why did they give up tech and go for the plot of Star trek insurrection? If there are over 38,000 humans wandering around, scattered all over the earth, why weren't their bones dug up? What happened to them; did they all kill themselves with tetanus within days? Why didn't the modern humans on New Earth find Cyclon bones? Who the hell bred with Hera, that kid with the bad kidney? Why didn't they find remains of the plane?
What are the hallucination people? Angels? Demons? Genies? Pissed off aliens who are tired of us dragging this crap back and forth across the galaxy? How do we know they actually know anything and aren't just making up vague prophecies and then taking credit when things happen?
If that's the end, what am I supposed to take away from this? Is this about humanity? Republicans? Is it a representational story about ducks crossing a pond? The Matrix? The Truman show? Is this the largest computer in the world calculating the meaning of life and it got a computer virus that made it miscount by five? Is it just one long series about how South Korea will kill us with robots? Should we not be happy with luxuries? If technology is bad because it outdoes the soul, then why were we supposed to be sad when the spaceship broke?
When is 'island' a verb?
I think my paint theory makes more sense.