(no subject)
I've had two hours of sleep and I'm too awake for my own good. Soon, my house will be filled with noise of my roommates getting drunk.
I just wish for quiet.
It's raining outside, and that helps, in some respect, but I'm still here, thrashing in my own skin, trying to accept my situation and move on. I want to be floating on a cloud in a deep sleep.
I think I am locking myself in the room for the day. I am not taking phone calls. It is rainy outside, and by definition, I am ill. My body needs rest. I'd sleep on my couch if my house wouldn't be filled with drunken rambling within the next couple of hours. But there are no walls or doors around it. So I am here.
I'll open the windows to let the sound and smell of rain in. And maybe I'll get past this restlessness that just wants me to bike out in the damp, gray world. I have no place to go, no business to conduct. But I could use a warm meal and would bike out in search of one if my body had more time to rest, and also, if See-Jay didn't have my bike right now - he is at the liquor store. Hooray. Only not.
Take it in stride, she said. I am on vacation. Why can't I cheer up a little more?
I just wish for quiet.
It's raining outside, and that helps, in some respect, but I'm still here, thrashing in my own skin, trying to accept my situation and move on. I want to be floating on a cloud in a deep sleep.
I think I am locking myself in the room for the day. I am not taking phone calls. It is rainy outside, and by definition, I am ill. My body needs rest. I'd sleep on my couch if my house wouldn't be filled with drunken rambling within the next couple of hours. But there are no walls or doors around it. So I am here.
I'll open the windows to let the sound and smell of rain in. And maybe I'll get past this restlessness that just wants me to bike out in the damp, gray world. I have no place to go, no business to conduct. But I could use a warm meal and would bike out in search of one if my body had more time to rest, and also, if See-Jay didn't have my bike right now - he is at the liquor store. Hooray. Only not.
Take it in stride, she said. I am on vacation. Why can't I cheer up a little more?