G.I. Joe: Cabbages and Kings #4:
Title: Anastomosis
Series: Cabbages and Kings #4 (BH/CG)
Fandom: G.I. Joe
Rated: PG-13
Summary: Some people regress. Some people... don't. And sometimes it takes a little anesthesia for people to say what they really mean...
Disclaimer: Holy cow, I definitely don't own them... these days, they own ME!
Notes: Otherwise known as 'when fanfiction meets my everyday life...'
Anastomosis
Anastomosis: Scalpel
“Nnn… ah? Oh. Ah. Hey. Darlin’.”
“Hey. Hey, there, Ranger Man. Welcome back.”
“Mmh. You’re a heck of a sight to wake up to, you know that?”
“Wha… Heh. Aww! Oh, Beach Head, you are so going to be mad at yourself when you’re more awake…”
“What d’you mean, Princess? Hey, what’re you doin’ in my… wait… why’re you holdin’ my hand-wait, what in the blue blazes-“
“Yep, there we go. Whoa, easy there. Don’t sit up. Hey!”
“Cover Girl? What’s-where the Hell-“
“Easy, Beach. S’okay. Easy. You’re in the hospital. You’re just waking up.”
“What?! Why am I… and why does my voice sound…”
“Lie down, damn you, before I have to sit on you. I will hold you down, just you watch.”
“Pfft, you kidding, I could bench press you with one arm! Just you try it, Cinderella, just you-“
“You know how pissed you’re going to be if I actually can? Don’t you remember what happened? C’mon, Beach, right now you’re numero uno on the injured list..”
“Wha-someone took me down in battle? Shit.”
“Er… uh… that’d be a negative, Master Sergeant.”
“Cover Girl…”
“You, uh… you kind of… collapsed, more like.”
“I did wha-ah-fuckin’ A-OW!“
“Oh, geez, Beach! Don’t sit up like that, you’re gonna pop your staples or split your stitches open or… or something!”
“Staples? What the fuckin’ Hell is goin’ on here, Cover Girl?!”
“Oh, stop yelling. You’re going to scare the nurses, and not even you can be intimidating in a hospital gown, let me tell you.”
“When I get my hands on you, Princess-“
“Yeah, yeah, you’ll make me do push-ups with my nose, or something equally creative and painful. Look, if you just relax some, I’ll tell you what happened.”
“No. I need some water-my mouth feels like damned Trucial Abysmia.”
“Uh… that’d be a ‘negative’ on the water, too, Beach. Doctor’s orders. No eating, no drinking, or you might… explode, or something. Hey-don’t pull on that!”
“What do you mean, don’t pull on it, it’s a fuckin’ tube up my nose!”
“Yeah, and you probably need it! Simmer down, Wayne!”
“Are you telling me what I can and cannot do, Corporal?!”
“Yes! I mean-seriously, I think your body’s telling you that! I’m serious, Beach. Ease up. Come on, please. You’re really gonna hurt yourself again.”
“…Again, huh?”
“Yeah. Again. You had us all really worried for awhile, there… you’ve been totally out of it for… I think it’s been five days.”
“Five… days. Ah, fuck. I… ah… so you gonna… tell me why the Hell can’t I feel my legs?”
“You can’t feel your-?! Oh. Oh, wait. That’s right. Your legs are fine. Um, you’ve got a pain catheter in your back. A… whatsit, an epidural. Like they give pregnant ladies, you know?”
“What the Hell-“
“…wow, that was an amazingly stupid choice of words on my part. Let me rephrase. Okay. You’re waking up from surgery. The pain catheter is in your back because you’ve got a big honking scar across your belly, and I’m pretty sure they had to cut muscle to get where they needed to be. And you can’t eat or drink because you had surgery on your belly. There’s a big sign over your head.”
“So why’s it my throat that’s killing me? My voice sounds weird.”
“Oh, I dunno, I think it’s kinda sexy. All gravelly.”
“Ha. Ha. Ha. You’re makin’ fun now, Cinderella, but once I’m outta here…”
“Uh-huh. Two words, again. ‘Hospital gown.’ Not even a little bit scary.”
“I got a real long memory, Princess, just you remember that. You’re not tellin’ me something real important, here, Cover Girl. What did I get surgery for? Somethin’ must’ve clocked me real hard-I don’t even remember the mission…”
“There wasn’t any mission, you hard-headed PT demon. You know what, that’s right, I’ve got a bone to pick with you. Why didn’t you tell someone you were sick?”
“Sick? I wasn’t sick.”
“My ass you weren’t sick!”
“What the Hell are you getting’ all hysterical about?”
“Hysterical-Beach Head, right now, you’re on the injured list, so I’m not going to hit you. But when you’re out of this damned place, you and I, we are gonna have it out so hard-okay. You telling me you weren’t in some kind of pain? Feeling rotten? Throwing up?“
“What’re you… oh, you mean that? I wasn’t at my peak, but Hell, Cinderella, you think a little bellyache’s gonna keep me down? So I had some bad gumbo, big deal-”
“A little bellyache-Beach, you had appendicitis!Snake-Eyes found you down when you missed hand-to-hand… you were lying on the floor in your quarters! Hell, you were so delirious you gave poor Snakes a black eye when he tried to see if you were okay!”
“I… I what?!”
“You heard me-Lifeline almost had a heart attack, your fever was so high! They airlifted you out-even LL thought you were going to die, you big stupid macho idiot! And all Hawk would tell us was, ‘he’s getting the best medical care available; I know you’re worried, but you’ve got jobs to do!’ He wouldn’t even tell us where you were!”
“Mmm. Yeah. Good advice. Hawk’s a good man.”
“…”
“What? Don’t give me that look.”
“Beach…”
“You know it’s true. If I went down… well, fuck, if I went down on the field and stayed down, you’d damned well keep goin’, right? Ain’t nothing you coulda done for me. Might as well get back to work. You thinkin’ of me or not thinkin’ of me, don’t make no difference to me, but if the mission’s not right, someone’s gonna die. The job always comes first. I haven't got time for tears and worrywarts.”
“…”
“You hearin’ me?”
“Yeah. Sure. Right. Of course.”
“Whoa-what’re you getting all your panties in a bunch-“
“You know what, I’m done. I’m out of here. Nice to see you’re going to live… I guess. I’ve got to go… get back to the Pit. You know how it is.”
“What the fu-Cinderella, you cryin’?!”
“No! You know what, Beach? If you can’t appreciate the fact that I was worried sick about you-but… you know what? No. I’m the stupid one. See you later, Ranger Man. I’ll tell the team you’re doing fine. Back to your old self, in fact.”
“Courtney-wait-I didn’t-ah, fuck.“
Anastamosis: Hand-Tie
“Are you… miss Krieger? I think I spoke to you on the phone. Ah… oh. Are you... okay?”
“Hmmm? Oh… hello. Yes. Yes, I’m... fine. I'm fine. Are you… you’re his surgeon, right?”
“Doctor Marinello, yes. How is he?”
“He’s fine, I think. Far as I can tell. He doesn’t like not being able to get up or have a drink, though.”
“Oh, you can say that again.”
“Uh-oh. What do you mean? I mean, he’s being… nevermind. As far as grumpy goes, he’s really not that bad today…”
“Not that… hah! I’ll have to tell the nursing staff that.”
“Really? I always thought nurses were pretty tough. I mean… I’ve been in the hospital, they don’t normally let someone being grouchy get in their way.”
“You’re absolutely correct. They don’t.”
“Uh-oh. Ma’am, I can see ‘something you’re not telling me’ coming at me from all the way down the hall…”
“Miss Krieger, didn’t you wonder why you were the only one in that room?”
“I mean… no, not really.”
“Oh, our nursing staff is excellent, and very attentive… normally. But every time Sergeant Sneeden’s woken up to find someone within arm’s reach, he’s threatened them with serious, ah, bodily harm if they approach him. We’re lucky he still has an IV site; I don’t know that nursing would be able to get another one, and I don’t even want to think about his central line. We haven’t even been able to get blood pressures on him.”
“Oh… Wayne, you idiot… I’m so sorry, Doc.”
“It’s really all right, miss. I understand that the disorientation following a surgery and anesthesia-especially with the massive infection he had-can be worse for members of our Armed Forces… you know, all things considered. I once had a patient wake up and think he was in Afghanistan…”
“Oh. Uh… Yeah. He… I think he’ll be better now. I think.”
“Heh, yes, I suspect so. Often, having a visitor will do that.”
“Oh. So… why did you call me? Why not General Hawk?”
“Hmmm? Who?”
“Uh… General Abernathy. His CO, his commanding officer.”
“I did call General… Abernathy, was it? He was listed as the contact number. But… you understand, this isn’t a VA facility, and you were the one Sergeant Sneeden was asking for when he woke up. Generally, we try and accommodate those requests-patient first, you know.”
“He was… asking for… me? Wait, wait. What? But you told me when we talked on the phone that he was still asleep…”
“Oh, he was… well, in a manner of speaking. People wake up a number of times, after surgery, and he’d just gotten some Versed. It’s a sedative.”
“Oh. So he’s been awake?”
“Er… yes and no? Sergeant Sneeden woke up in our post-anesthesia unit, after he was extubated this morning. Caused quite a stir, let me tell you! Then he started trying to tear out his lines, and that’s why he got the Versed.”
“Oh, no…”
“Heh, Miss Krieger, it happens. We’re used to it. Many patients don’t even remember it happened at all, and most, well, they don’t remember a thing that they’re told post-anesthesia. But he kept asking for ‘Courtney,’ and in the interest of, er, preserving the peace, I asked his commanding officer who that was, and if she could be reached. He was the one who gave me your number.”
“You asked Hawk if… oh, brother.”
“Is this a… problem? Most people would like to be with their loved ones in their convalescence, especially after a time like he’s had. I can have nursing bring over a cot or recliner, if you would like to stay over tonight.”
“Uh… but I’m not family, or anything.”
“Oh, goodness. That’s really all right. He’s stable, and we’re not the Catholic church; significant others can stay overnight if they want to.”
“I… this is awkward. Ma’am… let’s start again. I’m Corporal Courtney Krieger. He and I serve together. I’m, uh, not his girlfriend.”
“…oh. Oh. Oh, no. I’m so sorry, I just… oh, geez. I’m sorry.”
“I, uh… it’s… no problem, doctor.”
“That… well, that makes a lot more sense, now.”
“It does?”
“Well, yes. I wasn’t there when he woke up, you understand, but the PACU nursing staff said that he kept yelling for you to ‘sing out.’”
“Hah! Yeah. He would.”
“It was just… I don’t know, perhaps I’m misconstruing things, but he seems rather fond of you. Am I wrong?”
“Actually, if you asked him, he’d probably tell you I’m his cross to bear. And then... he'd probably go on in that vein for awhile.”
“Really? But he kept calling you ‘darlin’’ and ‘Princess,’ so we just sort of assumed…”
“You’re very good at imitating his accent, you know. Oh. He… oh, yeah. He calls me that, sometimes. He calls me Cinderella, too… right before he makes me run laps. Frankly, he’ll call people whatever suits him.”
“Hah! That I will believe. I’m so sorry you went through all the trouble to come here… What with that thing about the snakes, I suppose we really shouldn’t have taking his ramblings too seriously.”
“…snakes? What about snakes?”
“Oh-something about how he’d, quote, ‘wipe out every damned hissin’ cobra in the eff-in' universe if they so much as touched my girl,’ unquote. Something like that. People do say strange things coming out from under anesthesia.”
“Oh. Um. Cobras, huh. Uh… yeah. Ha ha.”
“I really apologize for bringing you all the way here. That’ll teach me.”
“It’s no problem. I wanted to see him, anyway. We’ve all been… worried.”
“Well, it was very good of you to come, my misunderstanding aside. I suppose you’re on your way back to base, then? Feel free to call the nursing station if you need any updates-yes, that’s the number. And they can page me if you or your commanding officer have any questions they can’t answer.”
“Um… Doctor Marinello? Can I ask just one more question?”
“Of course, of course.”
“How how bad was it, really? So I can, y’know, take an update back to the guys.”
“Well… how much do you want to know?”
“Tell it to me straight, ma’am.”
“Ah… honestly? He’s just… incredibly lucky. It was one of the worst cases of peritonitis-um, that’s inflammation inside the abdomen-that I’ve ever seen, Corporal. He was septic; that was why we had to go back in.”
“Septic? Go back… in? In where? Wait, what? For an appendix?”
“Yes? Well… in a manner of speaking? It wasn’t just inflamed, it’d ruptured, and from how unstable he was when he got here, not recently, either. During the surgery… well, never mind that. He must have been in agony-I really don’t know how it got that bad.”
“Oh, Lord. I do. So… so what happened? He got better, right?”
“Worse before it got better, Corporal. We rushed him to the OR and took out that appendix, but the damage was pretty much already done, by then. He’s really been touch-and-go in the ICU for the past few days, and this morning… well, we made the decision to operate again, see if we could clean out the nidus of infection. Looks like we got it, though.”
“…oh. Jesus. He’s had two operations since he’s been here?”
“Yes-an appendectomy, and an ex-lap, an exploratory laparotomy. That’s why his incision is so large.”
“Oh, man. That sounds… really… bad.”
“It was. But it could have gone much, much worse. He seems to have tolerated the whole ordeal rather well, actually. Medically, anyway. Oh… is he complaining that his throat hurts?”
“Actually… yes, and his voice sounds really rough…”
“Ah, that’s unfortunate. Yes, well, he has had a machine breathing for him for the past four days… but other than that, he’s made a rather remarkable recovery of it thus far. I admit, I was against extubating him, but it was anesthesia’s call, and he woke up right away! Let me tell you, Miss Krieger, it’s a pure miracle to see him on the regular floor rather than back in the ICU.”
“So… so he’s going to be okay, right?”
“Mm-hm. We’re going to have to keep him for awhile longer-he needs a metric ton of IV antibiotics-but right now, yes, he’s looking like he’s going to be fine. Grumpy, perhaps, but fine. You can tell your team that we’re watching over him.”
“Thanks, ma’am.”
“Well, literally just watching over him, since we can’t really get any vitals on him… kind of funny, almost. Thank goodness he still has his central line, or else we wouldn’t have labs, either.”
“Oh… yeah, about that. Tell your people to be careful… I mean, he doesn’t mean to be an ass, but he kind of forgets that there are people outside the military who aren’t, y’know, actually under his command…”
“It’ll be fine. We might not be military, Corporal, but if he doesn’t cooperate, I do come armed with succinylcholine.”
“What’s that?”
“Full-body paralytic.”
“…oh, geez. I don’t think he’s going to like that…”
“I’m just kidding, miss Krieger.”
“I… I… oh. Heh. Thank you, doc. Thanks so much. Thanks for taking care of him. Even if he is being a pain.”
“Not at all. You’re very welcome, and thank you for coming to see him. Hopefully, he’ll be a bit more cooperative now. Ah-where’s my pager-dratted thing. I’m sorry, I have to go. Anything else I can do for you?”
“Um… actually…”
“Yes?”
“Is there any way I could ask someone about that cot you mentioned earlier?”
~fin~
Start: June 8, 2009
End: June 9, 2009
Anastomosis = joining two parts together to make them contiguous. ^_~ A hand-tie is one of the ways of bringing the two parts together--slow and tedious and meticulous.
I'm currently giving Courtney an eye-roll: yeah, that'll teach him to watch his mouth, won't it, Cover Girl? Ah, well, I guess she can't help it.
There’s no way they would have extubated him postop, if he was actually that sick-he’d have hung around in the ICU for a few more days. But it seemed to work better this way for story purposes, you know? After all, ICU rooms definitely don’t allow overnight sleepovers…
I was deciding between pancreatitis, complicated appendicitis, and pneumonia. Surgical solutions are so much more dramatic, but... putting poor Beach through a Puestow or something seemed... excessive. People don’t often get septic from perforated appendices, but it happens?
Post-anesthesia disorientation: very true, in some people. The doctor actually telling CG about all this… probably not true. Deus ex machina, anyone?
Series: Cabbages and Kings #4 (BH/CG)
Fandom: G.I. Joe
Rated: PG-13
Summary: Some people regress. Some people... don't. And sometimes it takes a little anesthesia for people to say what they really mean...
Disclaimer: Holy cow, I definitely don't own them... these days, they own ME!
Notes: Otherwise known as 'when fanfiction meets my everyday life...'
Anastomosis
Anastomosis: Scalpel
“Nnn… ah? Oh. Ah. Hey. Darlin’.”
“Hey. Hey, there, Ranger Man. Welcome back.”
“Mmh. You’re a heck of a sight to wake up to, you know that?”
“Wha… Heh. Aww! Oh, Beach Head, you are so going to be mad at yourself when you’re more awake…”
“What d’you mean, Princess? Hey, what’re you doin’ in my… wait… why’re you holdin’ my hand-wait, what in the blue blazes-“
“Yep, there we go. Whoa, easy there. Don’t sit up. Hey!”
“Cover Girl? What’s-where the Hell-“
“Easy, Beach. S’okay. Easy. You’re in the hospital. You’re just waking up.”
“What?! Why am I… and why does my voice sound…”
“Lie down, damn you, before I have to sit on you. I will hold you down, just you watch.”
“Pfft, you kidding, I could bench press you with one arm! Just you try it, Cinderella, just you-“
“You know how pissed you’re going to be if I actually can? Don’t you remember what happened? C’mon, Beach, right now you’re numero uno on the injured list..”
“Wha-someone took me down in battle? Shit.”
“Er… uh… that’d be a negative, Master Sergeant.”
“Cover Girl…”
“You, uh… you kind of… collapsed, more like.”
“I did wha-ah-fuckin’ A-OW!“
“Oh, geez, Beach! Don’t sit up like that, you’re gonna pop your staples or split your stitches open or… or something!”
“Staples? What the fuckin’ Hell is goin’ on here, Cover Girl?!”
“Oh, stop yelling. You’re going to scare the nurses, and not even you can be intimidating in a hospital gown, let me tell you.”
“When I get my hands on you, Princess-“
“Yeah, yeah, you’ll make me do push-ups with my nose, or something equally creative and painful. Look, if you just relax some, I’ll tell you what happened.”
“No. I need some water-my mouth feels like damned Trucial Abysmia.”
“Uh… that’d be a ‘negative’ on the water, too, Beach. Doctor’s orders. No eating, no drinking, or you might… explode, or something. Hey-don’t pull on that!”
“What do you mean, don’t pull on it, it’s a fuckin’ tube up my nose!”
“Yeah, and you probably need it! Simmer down, Wayne!”
“Are you telling me what I can and cannot do, Corporal?!”
“Yes! I mean-seriously, I think your body’s telling you that! I’m serious, Beach. Ease up. Come on, please. You’re really gonna hurt yourself again.”
“…Again, huh?”
“Yeah. Again. You had us all really worried for awhile, there… you’ve been totally out of it for… I think it’s been five days.”
“Five… days. Ah, fuck. I… ah… so you gonna… tell me why the Hell can’t I feel my legs?”
“You can’t feel your-?! Oh. Oh, wait. That’s right. Your legs are fine. Um, you’ve got a pain catheter in your back. A… whatsit, an epidural. Like they give pregnant ladies, you know?”
“What the Hell-“
“…wow, that was an amazingly stupid choice of words on my part. Let me rephrase. Okay. You’re waking up from surgery. The pain catheter is in your back because you’ve got a big honking scar across your belly, and I’m pretty sure they had to cut muscle to get where they needed to be. And you can’t eat or drink because you had surgery on your belly. There’s a big sign over your head.”
“So why’s it my throat that’s killing me? My voice sounds weird.”
“Oh, I dunno, I think it’s kinda sexy. All gravelly.”
“Ha. Ha. Ha. You’re makin’ fun now, Cinderella, but once I’m outta here…”
“Uh-huh. Two words, again. ‘Hospital gown.’ Not even a little bit scary.”
“I got a real long memory, Princess, just you remember that. You’re not tellin’ me something real important, here, Cover Girl. What did I get surgery for? Somethin’ must’ve clocked me real hard-I don’t even remember the mission…”
“There wasn’t any mission, you hard-headed PT demon. You know what, that’s right, I’ve got a bone to pick with you. Why didn’t you tell someone you were sick?”
“Sick? I wasn’t sick.”
“My ass you weren’t sick!”
“What the Hell are you getting’ all hysterical about?”
“Hysterical-Beach Head, right now, you’re on the injured list, so I’m not going to hit you. But when you’re out of this damned place, you and I, we are gonna have it out so hard-okay. You telling me you weren’t in some kind of pain? Feeling rotten? Throwing up?“
“What’re you… oh, you mean that? I wasn’t at my peak, but Hell, Cinderella, you think a little bellyache’s gonna keep me down? So I had some bad gumbo, big deal-”
“A little bellyache-Beach, you had appendicitis!Snake-Eyes found you down when you missed hand-to-hand… you were lying on the floor in your quarters! Hell, you were so delirious you gave poor Snakes a black eye when he tried to see if you were okay!”
“I… I what?!”
“You heard me-Lifeline almost had a heart attack, your fever was so high! They airlifted you out-even LL thought you were going to die, you big stupid macho idiot! And all Hawk would tell us was, ‘he’s getting the best medical care available; I know you’re worried, but you’ve got jobs to do!’ He wouldn’t even tell us where you were!”
“Mmm. Yeah. Good advice. Hawk’s a good man.”
“…”
“What? Don’t give me that look.”
“Beach…”
“You know it’s true. If I went down… well, fuck, if I went down on the field and stayed down, you’d damned well keep goin’, right? Ain’t nothing you coulda done for me. Might as well get back to work. You thinkin’ of me or not thinkin’ of me, don’t make no difference to me, but if the mission’s not right, someone’s gonna die. The job always comes first. I haven't got time for tears and worrywarts.”
“…”
“You hearin’ me?”
“Yeah. Sure. Right. Of course.”
“Whoa-what’re you getting all your panties in a bunch-“
“You know what, I’m done. I’m out of here. Nice to see you’re going to live… I guess. I’ve got to go… get back to the Pit. You know how it is.”
“What the fu-Cinderella, you cryin’?!”
“No! You know what, Beach? If you can’t appreciate the fact that I was worried sick about you-but… you know what? No. I’m the stupid one. See you later, Ranger Man. I’ll tell the team you’re doing fine. Back to your old self, in fact.”
“Courtney-wait-I didn’t-ah, fuck.“
Anastamosis: Hand-Tie
“Are you… miss Krieger? I think I spoke to you on the phone. Ah… oh. Are you... okay?”
“Hmmm? Oh… hello. Yes. Yes, I’m... fine. I'm fine. Are you… you’re his surgeon, right?”
“Doctor Marinello, yes. How is he?”
“He’s fine, I think. Far as I can tell. He doesn’t like not being able to get up or have a drink, though.”
“Oh, you can say that again.”
“Uh-oh. What do you mean? I mean, he’s being… nevermind. As far as grumpy goes, he’s really not that bad today…”
“Not that… hah! I’ll have to tell the nursing staff that.”
“Really? I always thought nurses were pretty tough. I mean… I’ve been in the hospital, they don’t normally let someone being grouchy get in their way.”
“You’re absolutely correct. They don’t.”
“Uh-oh. Ma’am, I can see ‘something you’re not telling me’ coming at me from all the way down the hall…”
“Miss Krieger, didn’t you wonder why you were the only one in that room?”
“I mean… no, not really.”
“Oh, our nursing staff is excellent, and very attentive… normally. But every time Sergeant Sneeden’s woken up to find someone within arm’s reach, he’s threatened them with serious, ah, bodily harm if they approach him. We’re lucky he still has an IV site; I don’t know that nursing would be able to get another one, and I don’t even want to think about his central line. We haven’t even been able to get blood pressures on him.”
“Oh… Wayne, you idiot… I’m so sorry, Doc.”
“It’s really all right, miss. I understand that the disorientation following a surgery and anesthesia-especially with the massive infection he had-can be worse for members of our Armed Forces… you know, all things considered. I once had a patient wake up and think he was in Afghanistan…”
“Oh. Uh… Yeah. He… I think he’ll be better now. I think.”
“Heh, yes, I suspect so. Often, having a visitor will do that.”
“Oh. So… why did you call me? Why not General Hawk?”
“Hmmm? Who?”
“Uh… General Abernathy. His CO, his commanding officer.”
“I did call General… Abernathy, was it? He was listed as the contact number. But… you understand, this isn’t a VA facility, and you were the one Sergeant Sneeden was asking for when he woke up. Generally, we try and accommodate those requests-patient first, you know.”
“He was… asking for… me? Wait, wait. What? But you told me when we talked on the phone that he was still asleep…”
“Oh, he was… well, in a manner of speaking. People wake up a number of times, after surgery, and he’d just gotten some Versed. It’s a sedative.”
“Oh. So he’s been awake?”
“Er… yes and no? Sergeant Sneeden woke up in our post-anesthesia unit, after he was extubated this morning. Caused quite a stir, let me tell you! Then he started trying to tear out his lines, and that’s why he got the Versed.”
“Oh, no…”
“Heh, Miss Krieger, it happens. We’re used to it. Many patients don’t even remember it happened at all, and most, well, they don’t remember a thing that they’re told post-anesthesia. But he kept asking for ‘Courtney,’ and in the interest of, er, preserving the peace, I asked his commanding officer who that was, and if she could be reached. He was the one who gave me your number.”
“You asked Hawk if… oh, brother.”
“Is this a… problem? Most people would like to be with their loved ones in their convalescence, especially after a time like he’s had. I can have nursing bring over a cot or recliner, if you would like to stay over tonight.”
“Uh… but I’m not family, or anything.”
“Oh, goodness. That’s really all right. He’s stable, and we’re not the Catholic church; significant others can stay overnight if they want to.”
“I… this is awkward. Ma’am… let’s start again. I’m Corporal Courtney Krieger. He and I serve together. I’m, uh, not his girlfriend.”
“…oh. Oh. Oh, no. I’m so sorry, I just… oh, geez. I’m sorry.”
“I, uh… it’s… no problem, doctor.”
“That… well, that makes a lot more sense, now.”
“It does?”
“Well, yes. I wasn’t there when he woke up, you understand, but the PACU nursing staff said that he kept yelling for you to ‘sing out.’”
“Hah! Yeah. He would.”
“It was just… I don’t know, perhaps I’m misconstruing things, but he seems rather fond of you. Am I wrong?”
“Actually, if you asked him, he’d probably tell you I’m his cross to bear. And then... he'd probably go on in that vein for awhile.”
“Really? But he kept calling you ‘darlin’’ and ‘Princess,’ so we just sort of assumed…”
“You’re very good at imitating his accent, you know. Oh. He… oh, yeah. He calls me that, sometimes. He calls me Cinderella, too… right before he makes me run laps. Frankly, he’ll call people whatever suits him.”
“Hah! That I will believe. I’m so sorry you went through all the trouble to come here… What with that thing about the snakes, I suppose we really shouldn’t have taking his ramblings too seriously.”
“…snakes? What about snakes?”
“Oh-something about how he’d, quote, ‘wipe out every damned hissin’ cobra in the eff-in' universe if they so much as touched my girl,’ unquote. Something like that. People do say strange things coming out from under anesthesia.”
“Oh. Um. Cobras, huh. Uh… yeah. Ha ha.”
“I really apologize for bringing you all the way here. That’ll teach me.”
“It’s no problem. I wanted to see him, anyway. We’ve all been… worried.”
“Well, it was very good of you to come, my misunderstanding aside. I suppose you’re on your way back to base, then? Feel free to call the nursing station if you need any updates-yes, that’s the number. And they can page me if you or your commanding officer have any questions they can’t answer.”
“Um… Doctor Marinello? Can I ask just one more question?”
“Of course, of course.”
“How how bad was it, really? So I can, y’know, take an update back to the guys.”
“Well… how much do you want to know?”
“Tell it to me straight, ma’am.”
“Ah… honestly? He’s just… incredibly lucky. It was one of the worst cases of peritonitis-um, that’s inflammation inside the abdomen-that I’ve ever seen, Corporal. He was septic; that was why we had to go back in.”
“Septic? Go back… in? In where? Wait, what? For an appendix?”
“Yes? Well… in a manner of speaking? It wasn’t just inflamed, it’d ruptured, and from how unstable he was when he got here, not recently, either. During the surgery… well, never mind that. He must have been in agony-I really don’t know how it got that bad.”
“Oh, Lord. I do. So… so what happened? He got better, right?”
“Worse before it got better, Corporal. We rushed him to the OR and took out that appendix, but the damage was pretty much already done, by then. He’s really been touch-and-go in the ICU for the past few days, and this morning… well, we made the decision to operate again, see if we could clean out the nidus of infection. Looks like we got it, though.”
“…oh. Jesus. He’s had two operations since he’s been here?”
“Yes-an appendectomy, and an ex-lap, an exploratory laparotomy. That’s why his incision is so large.”
“Oh, man. That sounds… really… bad.”
“It was. But it could have gone much, much worse. He seems to have tolerated the whole ordeal rather well, actually. Medically, anyway. Oh… is he complaining that his throat hurts?”
“Actually… yes, and his voice sounds really rough…”
“Ah, that’s unfortunate. Yes, well, he has had a machine breathing for him for the past four days… but other than that, he’s made a rather remarkable recovery of it thus far. I admit, I was against extubating him, but it was anesthesia’s call, and he woke up right away! Let me tell you, Miss Krieger, it’s a pure miracle to see him on the regular floor rather than back in the ICU.”
“So… so he’s going to be okay, right?”
“Mm-hm. We’re going to have to keep him for awhile longer-he needs a metric ton of IV antibiotics-but right now, yes, he’s looking like he’s going to be fine. Grumpy, perhaps, but fine. You can tell your team that we’re watching over him.”
“Thanks, ma’am.”
“Well, literally just watching over him, since we can’t really get any vitals on him… kind of funny, almost. Thank goodness he still has his central line, or else we wouldn’t have labs, either.”
“Oh… yeah, about that. Tell your people to be careful… I mean, he doesn’t mean to be an ass, but he kind of forgets that there are people outside the military who aren’t, y’know, actually under his command…”
“It’ll be fine. We might not be military, Corporal, but if he doesn’t cooperate, I do come armed with succinylcholine.”
“What’s that?”
“Full-body paralytic.”
“…oh, geez. I don’t think he’s going to like that…”
“I’m just kidding, miss Krieger.”
“I… I… oh. Heh. Thank you, doc. Thanks so much. Thanks for taking care of him. Even if he is being a pain.”
“Not at all. You’re very welcome, and thank you for coming to see him. Hopefully, he’ll be a bit more cooperative now. Ah-where’s my pager-dratted thing. I’m sorry, I have to go. Anything else I can do for you?”
“Um… actually…”
“Yes?”
“Is there any way I could ask someone about that cot you mentioned earlier?”
~fin~
Start: June 8, 2009
End: June 9, 2009
Anastomosis = joining two parts together to make them contiguous. ^_~ A hand-tie is one of the ways of bringing the two parts together--slow and tedious and meticulous.
I'm currently giving Courtney an eye-roll: yeah, that'll teach him to watch his mouth, won't it, Cover Girl? Ah, well, I guess she can't help it.
There’s no way they would have extubated him postop, if he was actually that sick-he’d have hung around in the ICU for a few more days. But it seemed to work better this way for story purposes, you know? After all, ICU rooms definitely don’t allow overnight sleepovers…
I was deciding between pancreatitis, complicated appendicitis, and pneumonia. Surgical solutions are so much more dramatic, but... putting poor Beach through a Puestow or something seemed... excessive. People don’t often get septic from perforated appendices, but it happens?
Post-anesthesia disorientation: very true, in some people. The doctor actually telling CG about all this… probably not true. Deus ex machina, anyone?