(no subject)
I feel empty. Painfully so. I am stuck. I am fighting but it seems so bleak. I still have things to fight for at least. I should be more thankful. Right now it is so hard to see the light. I feel that I take one step forward only to fall backwards three steps. I thought I was getting better. I wasn't. I was just so busy I didn't realize the stall in my progression. I have not kept up with looking for a job. I blame my ankle when that is not what is holding me back. It is my lack of confidence and lack of ambition. I badly want a driving force in my life. Right now I feel that my life has no goals. I should be doing things right now. I should be applying for jobs. I should not be moping about feeling sorry for myself. I must fight the desire to disappear. I should fight the empty feeling. It is so hard I am shaking right now.