video;
You are absolutely crazy, completely out of your pan, are you even-- Look, I’m turning on my wearable, everyone’s seeing this shit-- Everyone’s seeing how fucking insane you actually are.
[ The scene: Terezi Pyrope is unhinging Karkat Vantas’ closet door. She is violating his sacred place. She is committing untold blasphemies, and Karkat will not go gentle into that good night. ]
LADIES AND GENTLETROLLS. GRUBS AND FUCKWITS, BEAR WITNESS TO THIS FEAT OF EXCEPTIONAL STUPIDITY. TEREZI PYROPE, NOOKFONDLING IDIOT EXTRAORDINAIRE, STEALING MY GODDAMN DOOR. COME ON, COME ALL. WITNESS THIS ACT OF DEPRAVED MADNESS. WITNESS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GROW UP IN A FUCKING TREE WITH FORESTIMPS AS YOUR ONLY FRIENDS.
[ Terezi lifts her head to actually pay attention to Karkat’s ranting for the first time in the video. One brow is cocked higher than the other. She is clearly using her cane sword to wedge the hinges apart. Bitch, please. ]
There is no possible way that you can say I didn’t warn you about this! Today is the day that I end this closet’s reign of terror over your life. And you can just suck it up and deal with it!
[ At which point Terezi stands and gives the ajar door a good solid kick. The remaining bits of hinges crack. There’s a clattering thud. Whoops. Door? What door? There was never a door here. ]
Nothing of value is lost. I can get a new door, you blind failure. I just need to record your acts of madness for posterity’s sake.
[ Karkat angles the video, getting a close-up of Terezi’s face. Her grin takes on a dangerous edge. ] In that case, I would hate to be a disappointment to posterity!
[ She gleefully sheathes her cane-sword with an audible ‘shnk’ and captchalogues the fallen door into her sylladex. Then she turns back to the closet, wields her cane like a club and sets about smashing the closet walls in. For Justice and the Alternian way. The closet itself must die.
In response, there is silence. Disbelieving silence. And then a screech. The most terrible, ear-drum shattering, little girl screech known to man and not man. If you are capable of hearing his next words, then you are a stronger man than I am. ]
Woah, woah, WOAH, WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING. I CAN’T STOP FUCKING WHY WHAT OH MY FUCKING SHITLOVING BITCHFUCK LOBEGULPING QUIVERING BULGEFLARPING YES YOU ARE FLARPING A BULGE--
[ the post cuts out. ]
[ The scene: Terezi Pyrope is unhinging Karkat Vantas’ closet door. She is violating his sacred place. She is committing untold blasphemies, and Karkat will not go gentle into that good night. ]
LADIES AND GENTLETROLLS. GRUBS AND FUCKWITS, BEAR WITNESS TO THIS FEAT OF EXCEPTIONAL STUPIDITY. TEREZI PYROPE, NOOKFONDLING IDIOT EXTRAORDINAIRE, STEALING MY GODDAMN DOOR. COME ON, COME ALL. WITNESS THIS ACT OF DEPRAVED MADNESS. WITNESS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GROW UP IN A FUCKING TREE WITH FORESTIMPS AS YOUR ONLY FRIENDS.
[ Terezi lifts her head to actually pay attention to Karkat’s ranting for the first time in the video. One brow is cocked higher than the other. She is clearly using her cane sword to wedge the hinges apart. Bitch, please. ]
There is no possible way that you can say I didn’t warn you about this! Today is the day that I end this closet’s reign of terror over your life. And you can just suck it up and deal with it!
[ At which point Terezi stands and gives the ajar door a good solid kick. The remaining bits of hinges crack. There’s a clattering thud. Whoops. Door? What door? There was never a door here. ]
Nothing of value is lost. I can get a new door, you blind failure. I just need to record your acts of madness for posterity’s sake.
[ Karkat angles the video, getting a close-up of Terezi’s face. Her grin takes on a dangerous edge. ] In that case, I would hate to be a disappointment to posterity!
[ She gleefully sheathes her cane-sword with an audible ‘shnk’ and captchalogues the fallen door into her sylladex. Then she turns back to the closet, wields her cane like a club and sets about smashing the closet walls in. For Justice and the Alternian way. The closet itself must die.
In response, there is silence. Disbelieving silence. And then a screech. The most terrible, ear-drum shattering, little girl screech known to man and not man. If you are capable of hearing his next words, then you are a stronger man than I am. ]
Woah, woah, WOAH, WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING. I CAN’T STOP FUCKING WHY WHAT OH MY FUCKING SHITLOVING BITCHFUCK LOBEGULPING QUIVERING BULGEFLARPING YES YOU ARE FLARPING A BULGE--
[ the post cuts out. ]