VIDEO

[reunified]

[ If you don't know Altman's voice, the first few seconds are your only real indication of who's working the camera right now--there's about a second and a half of his face as he flips on the wearable, then the video immediately swings down to... track pants, running shoes, and what looks to be an oversized roomba

Comments

text;

[selfkismesis]

YOUR ONLY OPTION IS TO KILL IT.

video;

[reunified]

You mean break it?

text;

[selfkismesis]

HAVING DIFFICULTY READING, ARE YOU?
I SAID KILL IT.
MURDER THAT METAL BASTARD IN COLD BLOOD.
MAKE IT PAY.
*MAKE IT PAY.*

video;

[reunified]

It's a robot. You can't kill something that isn't alive in the first place.

text;

[selfkismesis]

WOW.
YOU MUST BE FUCKING ILLITERATE.
I AM TELLING YOU TO KILL THAT SORRY SACK OF NUTS AND BOLTS BEFORE IT DECIDES TO KILL YOU FIRST.
THERE IS NO DISMEMBERING GOING ON HERE.
THERE IS NO DISCONTINUATION OF THIS ROBOT.
THERE IS NO OTHER SYNONYM YOU WOULD LIKE TO USE THE DENY THE FACT THAT YOU NEED TO KILL THAT THING RIGHT THE FUCK NOW.
THERE IS NO YOU STILL TALKING TO ME ON YOUR VIEWFINDER WHILE THAT THING CONTINUES TO ROBOTAROUND.
KILL
K
I
L
L
FOUR LETTERS.
YOU CAN READ IT.
YOU CAN DO IT.
COME ON, YOU NOOKSUCKING BULGEMUNCHER.
KILL IT.
KILL.

video;

[reunified]

[ what is this even ]

What do you want me to do, curb stomp it with my running shoes?

text;

[selfkismesis]

IF THAT'S YOUR PREFERRED METHOD OF KILLING SHIT, GO RIGHT AHEAD.
I WANT TO WATCH, THOUGH.

video;

[reunified]

...You want to watch.

[ Uh. ]

You know there are probably websites dedicated to that kind of thing, right?

text;

[selfkismesis]

WHAT THE FUCK
I DON'T NEED A GODDAMN BUCKETSHOW
JUST KILL THE THING
SHOW ME
AND I'LL KNOW IT'S DEAD FOR SURE.
I WANT CONFIRMATION THAT IT'S NOT GOING TO GET STRONGER FROM YOUR HALFASSED ATTEMPTS AT MURDER AND COME AFTER ME.

video;

[reunified]

It's a cleaning robot. What's it going to do, trip you down some stairs?

text;

[selfkismesis]

THE FIRST CHANCE IT GETS, I'M SURE IT WOULD.

video;

[reunified]

I really don't think you're in any serious danger unless you rolled in trash or something.