John Egbert ≈ Fifth Windy Thing ≈ [Video] [BACKDATED TO MID ACID TRIP DAY]

[ecto_biologist]

[Ahahaha, nobody told John about the water supply, whoops. His glasses are all askew, and he looks like he's seen a ghost.]

Guys.

Guys.

I have something really. Really important to tell you.

I'm not kidding around here, okay.

I saw her, alright. I saw her.

She's here.

The Batterwitch is among us.Game over, man. Game over! She's coming for us

Comments

[emberandash]

[SKEPTIC FACE FOREVER]

... Batterwitch.

[ecto_biologist]

Did I stutter? The confectionery catalyst, crusher of all of creation! The Batterwitch Betty Crocker!

[emberandash]

[just let her think for a few moments to try and figure out why that name sounds familiar]

That's the name of an Earth company.

[ecto_biologist]

An evil Earth company! Run by a witch!

An evil witch!

[emberandash]

... I'm going to assume that you're one of the people who was drugged.

[ecto_biologist]

She's trying to get me! I mean, obviously. Because I'm the only one who knows she's a threat! And she's already conquered Earth!

[emberandash]

A company conquered Earth.

[clearly she doesn't know enough about monopolies and oligopolies]

[ecto_biologist]

Well if she's in space, she must have!

[Or Egbertian logic.]

[emberandash]

That's not the way it works here.