no riddles...
only a moment ago, we had nothing but time
everything lasted forever and you were all mine
only a dream, i know
thinking you'd never go
tearing off pieces of myself
just for the time advise me
fold my heart up small
or break it into pieces
find somewhere, and keep it there
take it when you go
there, in the frame of your face and the cast of your eyes
i saw this coming but still, i am caught by surprise
all of this time i knew
that i'd be losing you
that doesn't mean that it's okay
that doesn't mean i'm ready
so fold my heart up small
or break it into pieces
find somewhere, and keep it there
take it when you go
when you go
some things you'll always remember, some things you forget
no way to take it back now, no room for regret
that's no good for anyone
and so i come undone
now i am less than what i was
whatever's left is yours now
so fold my heart up small
or break it into pieces
find somewhere, and keep it there
take it when you go...
i can't keep my eyelids from fluttering when i try to close my eyes, as a hundred little images move through my brain, twisted in flight. frenetically fast, i can't seem to calm my thoughts. an abundance of verdancy, golden with sunlight, wherever he takes me, the dreamy haze that seems to surround us when we fuck. gravel stabbing into my back at the park, the first time he put his arm around me, kissing in the dark to a real-life soundtrack of baby giggles. dawns of soft pleasure every day, with his skin all silky next to mine.
i knew it was too perfect, i remember saying i was waiting for something to ruin it. all for such stupid, superficial reasons, unnatural disaster. look at ME. focus on my entirety. demonized by outside forces, for one or two details, just look at the whole fucking piece of work. i must have done something to deserve this, and i wish i could undo it.
i can start a new life. i can fight to forget. i won't go back to destructive psuedo-lovers, despite the tiny voice that says i may as well, i'll go north. i'll get an idyllic job at the food co-op, and trudge through an idyllic little life, alone, and erase it from my brain. fuck this shit. fuck setting myself up to be hurt, over. and over. and over. i don't want any more children, i don't want any more lovers. i want to hold on to these things, but i want forget them, too.
thoughts keep slicing through me, most melodramatic, rash swells of emotion & impulse. no tears, i haven't even had to choke them back. i have to cling to my son, my sanity, my anchor in the tidal. i could be a million miles away right now. i wish i could just smoke myself retarded and get some fucking sleep.
everything lasted forever and you were all mine
only a dream, i know
thinking you'd never go
tearing off pieces of myself
just for the time advise me
fold my heart up small
or break it into pieces
find somewhere, and keep it there
take it when you go
there, in the frame of your face and the cast of your eyes
i saw this coming but still, i am caught by surprise
all of this time i knew
that i'd be losing you
that doesn't mean that it's okay
that doesn't mean i'm ready
so fold my heart up small
or break it into pieces
find somewhere, and keep it there
take it when you go
when you go
some things you'll always remember, some things you forget
no way to take it back now, no room for regret
that's no good for anyone
and so i come undone
now i am less than what i was
whatever's left is yours now
so fold my heart up small
or break it into pieces
find somewhere, and keep it there
take it when you go...
i can't keep my eyelids from fluttering when i try to close my eyes, as a hundred little images move through my brain, twisted in flight. frenetically fast, i can't seem to calm my thoughts. an abundance of verdancy, golden with sunlight, wherever he takes me, the dreamy haze that seems to surround us when we fuck. gravel stabbing into my back at the park, the first time he put his arm around me, kissing in the dark to a real-life soundtrack of baby giggles. dawns of soft pleasure every day, with his skin all silky next to mine.
i knew it was too perfect, i remember saying i was waiting for something to ruin it. all for such stupid, superficial reasons, unnatural disaster. look at ME. focus on my entirety. demonized by outside forces, for one or two details, just look at the whole fucking piece of work. i must have done something to deserve this, and i wish i could undo it.
i can start a new life. i can fight to forget. i won't go back to destructive psuedo-lovers, despite the tiny voice that says i may as well, i'll go north. i'll get an idyllic job at the food co-op, and trudge through an idyllic little life, alone, and erase it from my brain. fuck this shit. fuck setting myself up to be hurt, over. and over. and over. i don't want any more children, i don't want any more lovers. i want to hold on to these things, but i want forget them, too.
thoughts keep slicing through me, most melodramatic, rash swells of emotion & impulse. no tears, i haven't even had to choke them back. i have to cling to my son, my sanity, my anchor in the tidal. i could be a million miles away right now. i wish i could just smoke myself retarded and get some fucking sleep.