He came home..

[singininmysleep]

I cry. I keep crying. I can't help it. I want to die. I am all alone in this world right now. I am alone in my marriage. My kids hate me. The guy I am married to treats me like shit. My aunt is a bitch. My parents have too many of their own problems for me to confide in/talk to them. My sister has her own life now. My brothers aren't ever around.

Comments

[klemolp]

Laurie, ok im sorry but I have to ask this...

What do you want? Do you just want someone to listen to you vent about how bad your lot in life currently is, or do you want someone to actually help you?

Dont get offended by my tone. Its honestly inquisitive (hoping I spelled that right). I've been reading the things people have been saying to you and I'm not sure if you're actually listening or thinking about what you're hearing. It seems more like you're just happy that people take the time enough to show you they care what you think by replying.

Don't get me wrong. I read 97% of what you post (when its not a survey or something). Its just that you seem to go from being very very utterly upset with your situation to being almost kinda happy when he takes you out once or something. I do honestly understand that anyone in your situation would rather find some sort of happiness in their relationship rather than find an ending to it. I know people have said you need to seek counceling, AND ITS TRUE. I can not remember if you've said you've tried yet, but if you haven't, you should.

And also... you need to start keeping a small journal about him and his comings and goings. If things come to sh!t, this will give a good testimony to the type of father/husband/person he is. Include in it the time he wakes up, the time he naps, the time he spend watching tv or playing video games, the time he goes and comes back from the gym, etc. I'm not saying that you have to do this daily, but you can just do it when you see something significant and worth mentioning (like the time and dates when he actually does things with the kids or when there is a big chunk of the bank account missing without your knowledge).

sweetie

[singininmysleep]

I have listened to the replies. I am seeking counseling. As for him... he's on his own planet. I may have to leave and take the kids and that is what I am seeing help for. My doctor said that I just have to make a plan, my problems are with following through.

Re: sweetie

[klemolp]

right on.

i got your back, at the very least, mentally. i'm yet another one of your fans who will tell you all the time "call me if you need to talk".